Nighttime is the worst

[Lobouspo]

I came back to my apartment for the weekend. I don't know if I've said but I'd been staying with my mom with the kids, I just needed the break. It's so hard being in town though, I have adopted a bad habit. Before I go to my apartment I cycle an extra 10 mins around town looking in all the parking lots of the hotels to see if xMM's truck is there. I can't believe I'm admitting this to anyone but it's a routine now. He used to go with me to the hotels here so I know his favorites. I just keep praying I'll finally find him one of these days to have proof he went on to a new affair. I know he has, he needed constant contact, constant praise. He needed someone just showering him with attention. We haven't spoken since that Thursday he came over.

 

The bad truth- I broke NC.

 

I texted for him to come over the night before I got to town. It took him

over s full day to read it. He responded. "I'm just not sure" I texted 2x more times and he read but didn't text. Didn't come. Tonight I asked again to come over and he read but didn't respond, didn't come. The feeling of devastation is huge. I thought we had something amazing but also, his daughter is here. Isn't he curious???????

 

My reasoning, I needed him to not see me. I needed to feel okay in the 'big' email my lawyer told him to send tomorrow. I have to tell him to fill out the child support papers and mail them back or we're serving him by sheriff. My lawyer is a nice man and thinks we'll get more if we play fair. He wants xMM to step up on his own. If MM had come over this weekend I would have second guessed everything, including the filing. With him ignoring me again, I feel like it gives me more power to do what I need to. But the hurt of him not wanting to see the baby or me is so profound. I wept last night. Just wept for FOUR hours in my bed. I miss him so much and I've never known a hurt like this, ever. He had me so conditioned to expect constant contact and then *poof* he's gone and living with his baby is living with his ghost.

 

I don't expect him to respond to the email. I think one of two things will happen - one, he already got a lawyer and isn't concerned about any of this because he thinks he can get out of it. Two - he will be conflict avoidant and run away. He hinted at suicide after the last 'big' email. Wtf do I do if he does that?????? It will have been my fault so any shot of my daughter ever knowing that part of her family will be gone because they'll blame me and her. I'm scared he just might do that as a narcisstic **** you. I don't know how to navigate a life that he isn't in, but living life knowing he's not alive anymore? I don't think there would be any coming back for me from that.

 

So that's where I am. I already have the email drafted. I'm second guessing it but I crafted the words with enough of my personal hurt and 'business like' mindedness to hopefully make him understand I'm serious and I'm not backing down.

 

I'm off to go cry some more. Why didn't he come? He needed me 2-4 times a week due to his sex drive and now he's going without completely? I don't believe it. He told me he didn't replace me but he did, it's obvious. Why the **** couldn't he just be honest?

 

 

This man does not care one bit about you or his child. If you don't care about your emotional well being (and possibly physical well being) Please consider the well being of your child. I don't mean to sound harsh, but its not all about you. This man is married. This man despises the child he had with you because it could ruin his life. Why on earth are you wanting him to come over for a hook up? Given that you are pursuing child support is that really smart? (or safe?) . Please get into therapy, and don't make your beautiful child pay for some irresponsible choices you have made and might continue to make. I work in LE, trust me I've seen similar situations such as yours end tragically. Pursue child support, go strict NC and get a restraining order if necessary

[LivingWaterPlease]

Mayday2016, while i believe it's good that MM didn't come over when you asked him to, I do want to point out that though he may not seem to care for you or your child, don't take his attitude as an assessment of your ranking on his list of people he cares for. Because he cares for no one but himself. There's really no one on his list that matters except himself and maintaining the current status quo.

 

That said, your life and the life of your child could be in danger by having him see you. Please, whatever you do, if he should try to contact you at any point, don't let him see you and your child. You MUST take this stance for your little girl. She has no one to protect her but you. Please step up to the plate for her sake and for yours, too, by not allowing him near you or your daughter from now on.

 

When you are lonely for him you must remind yourself that he has reason to want to have you and your daughter no longer exist and then behave accordingly (not ask him to see you).

[whatatangledweb]

I came back to my apartment for the weekend. I don't know if I've said but I'd been staying with my mom with the kids, I just needed the break. It's so hard being in town though, I have adopted a bad habit. Before I go to my apartment I cycle an extra 10 mins around town looking in all the parking lots of the hotels to see if xMM's truck is there. I can't believe I'm admitting this to anyone but it's a routine now. He used to go with me to the hotels here so I know his favorites. I just keep praying I'll finally find him one of these days to have proof he went on to a new affair. I know he has, he needed constant contact, constant praise. He needed someone just showering him with attention. We haven't spoken since that Thursday he came over.

 

The bad truth- I broke NC.

 

I texted for him to come over the night before I got to town. It took him over s full day to read it. He responded. "I'm just not sure" I texted 2x more times and he read but didn't text. Didn't come. Tonight I asked again to come over and he read but didn't respond, didn't come. The feeling of devastation is huge. I thought we had something amazing but also, his daughter is here. Isn't he curious???????

 

My reasoning, I needed him to not see me. I needed to feel okay in the 'big' email my lawyer told him to send tomorrow. I have to tell him to fill out the child support papers and mail them back or we're serving him by sheriff. My lawyer is a nice man and thinks we'll get more if we play fair. He wants xMM to step up on his own. If MM had come over this weekend I would have second guessed everything, including the filing. With him ignoring me again, I feel like it gives me more power to do what I need to. But the hurt of him not wanting to see the baby or me is so profound. I wept last night. Just wept for FOUR hours in my bed. I miss him so much and I've never known a hurt like this, ever. He had me so conditioned to expect constant contact and then *poof* he's gone and living with his baby is living with his ghost.

 

I don't expect him to respond to the email. I think one of two things will happen - one, he already got a lawyer and isn't concerned about any of this because he thinks he can get out of it. Two - he will be conflict avoidant and run away. He hinted at suicide after the last 'big' email. Wtf do I do if he does that?????? It will have been my fault so any shot of my daughter ever knowing that part of her family will be gone because they'll blame me and her. I'm scared he just might do that as a narcisstic **** you. I don't know how to navigate a life that he isn't in, but living life knowing he's not alive anymore? I don't think there would be any coming back for me from that.

 

So that's where I am. I already have the email drafted. I'm second guessing it but I crafted the words with enough of my personal hurt and 'business like' mindedness to hopefully make him understand I'm serious and I'm not backing down.

 

I'm off to go cry some more. Why didn't he come? He needed me 2-4 times a week due to his sex drive and now he's going without completely? I don't believe it. He told me he didn't replace me but he did, it's obvious. Why the **** couldn't he just be honest?

 

Mayday, you keep setting yourself up for more pain. Why is it you really want? Him to leave his wife and be with you as a family? I'm sorry but I don't see that happening. He reduced you to just booty calls for the last months you saw him..at the end of his driveway of all places. He told you he did not want the baby. He has given you no hope but yet you still reach for it.

 

Your baby is a joy for you. For him, it is a nightmare as it will cost him in many ways. I really don't see him changing the way he views it. Stop reaching out to him. It just hurts you when it doesn't turn out the way you want. Let your lawyer do all the contacting.

 

I know you want the baby to know her father's family. But the reality is they may not want anything to do with her. MM's siblings may not view her the way you want. They may see her as an embarrassment. I'm sorry I am not trying to hurt you. I have seen this happen several times with people I know. You can not force her on them.

 

How are you supporting yourself now that you are divorced? You had said before that you were getting SS while you were divorcing. You really have to plan your future without MM in it. Maybe moving away from him would be best.

 

My heart breaks for you and I wish I could take the pain from you.

[Ms. Faust]

He was seeing someone else while seeing you.

He reduced you to a booty call.

He refuses to acknowledge his own daughter.

 

What are you trying to salvage with this man? I do hope you feel better. Having just had a baby and your hormones in flux this is a very tumultuous time for you.

[afoolto no end]

You have been giving the greatest gift on earth.....and you are letting someone not worth your time take away from that.....

He is not embracing you or his baby, he is angry he is still using you......

He feels trapped and he doesn't know how to end this whole mess for himself...

My guess is he just wants you to disappear so he can get away scot free and his life isn't disrupted, an affair is one thing that can be ended. but a child there is no hiding that....he is trying to find a way to do that......

If you stopped calling him asking him for support for your child you would never hear from him again or see him......

sorry to be so blunt but I think you would have seen something different from him by now if he cared at all......

This is so one sided.......and you deserve more than this we all deserve someone to love us, so much so that we know it with everything in us.......and you are stressed about it all........that is not any kind of love .......that is you just being desperate........stop and start enjoying the gift you have been given......

Build a great life for you and your children and when the right man comes along he will just make your already great life better, compliment it ......no stress no worry, just good feelings.........

this isn't it...

[Gigi2015]

Mayday:

 

He's done. He NEVER wanted a real relationship and was cake eating. You believed it is possible for someone to a BETRAY those closest to him( his wife) and still be a good guy. He was in affair mode....meaning fantasy mode. Yes he saw you 2-4 times/week....he enjoyed a HIMSELF immensely. You were wrong to believe him....BUT--- this does NOT diminish your value as a person. STOP forcing yourself on him....this will only bring more sadness and humiliation. His attitude toward you doesn't determine YOUR WORTH. Sorry about your pain. You put your eggs in a high risk basket. Give your time and energy to those who appreciate you....not only sexually but with actions that prove the relationship is true and honest...HUGS!!! Keep your head high!

[Gigi2015]

Also Mayday...no need to look for another OW to replace you...your replacement has always been his WIFE. You find it hard to accept that because of the way he behaved with you while he was married to her. But--he never left her. Be glad you're not HER. Can you imagine the love of your life shagging someone else 4x per week.... My guess is her life is about to CAVE in too...you both have one thing in common: a heartless jerk!

[Gigi2015]

Mayday, you keep setting yourself up for more pain. Why is it you really want? Him to leave his wife and be with you as a family? I'm sorry but I don't see that happening. He reduced you to just booty calls for the last months you saw him..at the end of his driveway of all places. He told you he did not want the baby. He has given you no hope but yet you still reach for it.

 

Your baby is a joy for you. For him, it is a nightmare as it will cost him in many ways. I really don't see him changing the way he views it. Stop reaching out to him. It just hurts you when it doesn't turn out the way you want. Let your lawyer do all the contacting.

 

I know you want the baby to know her father's family. But the reality is they may not want anything to do with her. MM's siblings may not view her the way you want. They may see her as an embarrassment. I'm sorry I am not trying to hurt you. I have seen this happen several times with people I know. You can not force her on them.

 

How are you supporting yourself now that you are divorced? You had said before that you were getting SS while you were divorcing. You really have to plan your future without MM in it. Maybe moving away from him would be best.

 

My heart breaks for you and I wish I could take the pain from you.

 

This happened to my beautiful sister and brings tears to my eyes! Well spoken...I wish I could've taken her pain away....but only you can save yourself!

[Mayday2016]

Well. I sent the email.

 

I turned off my phone after I did. It somehow ended up being turned back on an hour later (damn kids) and it was a series of texts telling me he cared for me and all he feels is affection toward me but he cannot be the baby's dad that he will lose his life and that I need to let him go and give him peace, an email telling me to tell him where to meet him, and then phone calls. My mother was in the room and told me to answer the phone. She hovered wanting to be right in the middle.

 

He cried. Wanting to know why I was doing this to HIM. He pleaded to see me to 'talk' but I showed no emotion and did not give in. I was cold. I said things I never thought I'd say. He actually asked me why I was being "so mean". He's never heard me talk that way. He kept saying he has no money for the baby and if he gives it he will lose his marriage, house, and life. That he can't give me anything and he can't be her father, at all or ever. That he will never, ever be a father to her. When he realized I wasn't backing down 10 minutes into the call he started swearing at me and then the phone went dead. I was fearful the rest of the day he'd try to hurt himself. I texted once telling him to get a lawyer because while I love him, this needs to be about our daughter. And then I texted again just to see if iMessage would show if he was ok enough to read it. All it showed was as 'delivered' - I cried myself to sleep not knowing if he was alright and I cried realizing finally he will never care about his daughter, never. I have ****ed her, either she grows up knowing her father never wanted her and rejected her before she could ever 'deserve' it or I lie to her.

 

I didn't hear from him again until this afternoon. It was a text. He said: "Please ask your lawyer to resend the papers to me at {work address}.**I will respond and we can find a resolution to get {baby's name} support. The originals were destroyed" ..

 

He's having all the communication going through his work, his wife will not be finding out. I'm guessing he went from freaking the frig out to being all calm today because he talked to HIS family or whoever controls his trust fund and they're going to try and pay me off. Maybe he finally got a lawyer yesterday when he realized I was serious about this. He was frantic and trying to appeal to my emotions until he realized I wasn't giving in. I actually thought this may all be exposed and I would t have to raise my daughter as a secret and she'd have a shot at having knowledge of her other family (his) but it looks like that will never happen.

 

I feel defeated. I fell in love with not just a married man but one who used me, exploited my feelings, and lacks a shred of decency. Yes, he was low enough to betray his own wife and have an affair but this is a child- a person, a living, breathing person he created and he's going to throw her away like he did me, because we aren't any use to him. /sigh

Edited February 24, 2016 by Mayday2016

[Gigi2015]

Mayday:

 

He's WIFE was ALSO a living breathing person...not just your child! Don't give into the you'll ruin my life....screw him!! He's about as dishonest as they come. Let him reap what he's sowed. EVERYONE involved needs to know what a scumbag he really is. Maybe he'll even grow a little!

[Doublegold]

Mayday....Please gather whaterever strength you have left and focus it on your lil baby girl. She needs you. You are her only voice right now. You are doing the right thing. Rise above the quagmire that this affair has created. Rise above and focus on what you need to do, what you must do, for your daughter.

 

Please try to not be bogged down by thoughts of the future and what that holds for your child--extended family etc. That is for another time. You must focus on her needs at this moment. You cannot control his actions or non-actions. He is who he is. All you can do is what you need to do--for yourself and your daughter.

 

Please know this is written with full empathy for your deeply distressed state and your very hurting heart. You have come so far, you are responsible for this young baby's life now. Hold onto her and be the strength she needs. Everything else is moot. He is not the answer. Let the law handle him. Draw strength from within and love from that beautiful gift of life you hold and love.

[RRM321]

I feel defeated.

 

But, you're not defeated. In fact you've finally begun to act with courage. You've stood up, and you've begun to dawn some armor. This is the miracle of what mother's do. This is the power your new daughter will come to know.

 

You're daughter is not and should never be a secret. You are the source of your own power, and the birth of hers. Give your lawyer the consent to do what lawyers do best.

 

Give yourself the freedom to be who you are, give your children the freedom to make the world their own, and make a promise that each day you'll make at least one step forward.

 

Search for support by being present and accounted for. Break out of the loneliness by becoming an active and involved member of your community. Work on healthy friendships within groups of other people and stay away from romantic relationships until you truly fall in love with yourself.

 

PS: In the darkest and loneliest of times never be afraid to tell your story. Never hesitate to cry for help. Call social services, the YMCA, Catholic charities, Red Cross, state representatives, police or anyone who might direct you to the help you need. These agencies exist so that the people like us who type these words to you have a means to get you the help and support you need. You're not alone.

Edited February 24, 2016 by RRM321

[Ms. Faust]

Thank you for the update. I'm sorry he is not who you thought he was.

[Gigi2015]

Thank you for the update. I'm sorry he is not who you thought he was.

 

Mayday:

You're scenario is exactly as my sister's experience upon the onset of pregnancy. She was discarded immediately...she delivered her baby with only my mom at her side. HORRENDOUSLY cruel. His wife found out about the child years later. The BS's reaction was not at all what my sis expected. The BS was appalled that her H had neglected his OWN child....saw her only 3 times in all those years. That he kept her a secret! Upon discovery she actually was very sweet to my niece....she felt terrible for her. My sister was amazed at her kindness. The BS filed for divorce not only due to the betrayal but the way he had treated his child. She saw a man that was selfish to the core.

Edited February 24, 2016 by Gigi2015

[ChickiePops]

Mayday why are you still protecting this deadbeat loser? Why won't you tell his wife what a piece of filth she's married to so that she can have the same freedom you have to walk away from him?

 

If he was truly going to hurt himself he would just do it. He wouldn't threaten you with it. And it would be in no way, shape or form yours or your daughters fault. He's saying that to keep you quiet. He's a coward and a loser and he deserves to have his life blown up, just as his wife deserves the truth, and your daughter deserves the chance to possibly meet the rest of her family someday once things have calmed down.

 

Tell her!!!

[Mayday2016]

Mayday why are you still protecting this deadbeat loser? Why won't you tell his wife what a piece of filth she's married to so that she can have the same freedom you have to walk away from him?

 

If he was truly going to hurt himself he would just do it. He wouldn't threaten you with it. And it would be in no way, shape or form yours or your daughters fault. He's saying that to keep you quiet. He's a coward and a loser and he deserves to have his life blown up, just as his wife deserves the truth, and your daughter deserves the chance to possibly meet the rest of her family someday once things have calmed down.

 

Tell her!!!

 

 

 

I can't. I don't know why, I just can't. It just feels like it should come from him. That if I were to do it it would look as if I'm trying to be vindictive or hurt or or something. Plus, the fact I haven't done it means a part of him still might trust me. If the baby needs anything in the future, I'm not even sure what, having that little bit of trust left might help me get what she needs? Idk, maybe that isn't rational thinking. Maybe telling her is the best thing but I'll be honest, I wouldn't even know how. Plus, I don't want to see/hear/encounter her resulting pain. learning this, I don't know how she deals with the things he does... She might be so used to his disastrous ways she comes to expect this but it isn't telling her- hey, I had a one night stand with your hubby. Instead it's hey, we were together for 15 months, he convinced me to move to your town, I got pregnant and he stayed with me through my pregnancy and for a month after our baby was born. We now have a child which he doesn't choose to acknowledge. He's offering to finally find a "resolution to get {baby's name} support" so I'm sorry, have a nice day.

 

Yeah. Not sure if I should be doing that. I kind of want to see what he says and does once he sends the papers back to my lawyer. If he wants to do all this outside of the courts. If he wants to offer me a lump sum or what. I need to do what's best for my baby. I need to ensure she's taken care of financially and if his wife leaves him and requests money from him too, I just don't know what that means for my daughter. I'm not trying to sound like I have dollar signs in my eyes but her hospital bills are 8,000USD alone.

[Mayday2016]

I will say chickiepops that I have my Facebook name searchable and all the pictures of my daughter I've posted are public. Just looking at her she looks like xMM, he has very distinct blue eyes which my daughter inherited. Anyone that knows him would be remiss to admit she looks so much like him. Dark brown hair, long limbs (he's 6'7" so our daughter will be tall, and brilliant blue eyes- she looks so much like him he'd be a fool to request a DNA test which he hasn't even asked to do. He just wants to go right to the money so even he is acknowledging she's his, probably on looks alone or the fact he believed me when I told him he was the only man I was with.

 

So if his wife ever learns my name and Facebook searches me, she'll see the baby.

[Ms. Faust]

Ahhhh, man you did not have medicaid for your pregnancy?

Edited February 24, 2016 by Ms. Faust

[ChickiePops]

I understand why this is a precarious moment because of the child support but I hope you do tell her once all the paperwork is signed. She deserves to know and your daughter deserves to not be a source of shame and secrecy and lies to her father (I know that's harsh but that is how he's treating her right now).

 

Why do you care what he or his wife think of you at this point anyway? Are you sure you're not still clinging to hope that he will suddenly stop being a disgusting excuse for a human being and be with you? Or be a good father? Because I don't see that happening anytime soon.

 

I'm sorry, I know you're hurting right now and I'm being harsh. I do hope your daughter is safe and healthy and happy and I hope he comes through with the money you need.

[Bufo]

You are engaging in long term wishful thinking and in short term thinking at the same time. That he will grow to have a wonderful loving relationship with his daughter is wishful thinking. That your situation vis a vis you and him and the baby constitute the universe of players in this game of life is short term thinking.

 

I'm not being cruel, just trying to inject a little realism into this picture.

 

He already has a family and may not wish to attempt to blend the two families together. That includes his wife and existing children. His refusal to see he baby makes me suspect this is a real possibility. Short term you are setting yourself up to accept any sort of support deal offered. Most states have a schedule for regular support based on income. You mentions trust fund so that adds a big layer of complexity. If you have a lawyer (and I hope you do) make sure that lawyer is aware of his trust fund situation. Even if he says it's impossible to "crack it open". Many family court judges would simply say ok but we'll impute $Xxxx to his monthly income. Your state may or may not follow this rule for child support.

 

Also the child won't be a baby forever. Needs can change for the worse. Child support is usually modifiable. A lump sum settlement probably not. And I suspect you have no clue how expensive it is to raise a child to eighteen. Like me dical dental insurance school fees and a myriad of other expenses.

 

Please consult your legal help and listen to the advice as though it were being given to a friend of yours in the same circumstances. Difficult to separate the heart from the head but it is what you must do.

[minimariah]

I can't. I don't know why, I just can't. It just feels like it should come from him.

 

i don't think you should tell her -- you don't know what her reaction will be. that's currently a risk, considering the fact that you have a little child - so it's really for the best that you keep quiet.

 

if i were you -- i'd look into other options of financial support. don't rely on your MM too much. one thing that really worries me is the fact that this man isn't emotionally okay -- you need to protect yourself and your child from him. do not contact him AT ALL or even communicate with him without a lawyer. let your lawyer handle everything.

 

you can't make him be a father - it is what it is. don't let him around her, he's not going to take care of her. accept that as a done deal. she will understand when she grows up, no worries. it's a bumpy road but you work with what you got. and please, protect yourself. this situation can be dangerous for you if this man has any violent tendencies, for example.

[OWAmy]

My thoughts are that you will continue to be in this turmoil until you and your baby become real and acknowledged. Sooner or later you will become very angry with him. This is not going to resolve itself amicably.

 

His wife will end up finding out. Better to hear the truth from you than the lies that spill from the mouth of this disgusting 'man'. Force him to face up to the truth regardless of the consequences it has on him.

[Mayday2016]

Bufo, my lawyer is helping me. XMM's income is over six figures, it may not be currently as he's on sabbatical but generally that's what he makes annually. We want to make sure baby is awarded the right monthly payment with stipulations for college. XMM has his Ph.D. Which he earned at an Ivy League school, his family is very, very big on education so my lawyer already stated if we even consider lump sum there needs to be money there for her to use toward college. Believe me, my lawyer is starting to crunch numbers and is considering we may have to do a discovery because he discovered xMM has a secondary stream of income which may be attributed to the trust fund. I have no idea about xMM's debt, it may be quite large but his revenue streams are too.

 

Chickiepops- I'd be willing to bet that xMM may stipulate that I sign some sort of NDA/confidentiality agreement.

 

I'm trying to be pragmatic and think only for my daughter, it's just hard. I'm still raw and vulnerable like an exposed nerve. I have stared at the text where he wrote "please care for me by letting me go and giving me peace"... It just hurts so ****ing much that he wanted to walk away clean while I would be left with our child and a crater in my chest where my heart once was. I honestly cannot adequately articulate what meeting him has done to me, I never experienced a passion or obsession like I did with him. He was not a process addiction, he was like discovering the one person that spoke to my soul. I know I focus on the bad because they are so profoundly bad but we had very intense moments and discoveries. It's like we were the only two people that spoke a particular language. Even after I told him I was pregnant we had moments where even he couldn't deny there was something that clicked between us. I'll always have a hang up for him because of this. And because he's my daughters father. I can't just turn it off, over time I can learn to ignore it but it will always exist. There will always be love in my heart for him even after the hate invades more and more.

[Dancewithme]

I can't remember if you've covered this or not, but are you in counseling? As awful as this whole situation is, as awful as MM has treated you, it seems even while acknowledging this, you still have stars in you eyes where MM is concerned. Time will help the fog clear, but your situation is so messy and with potential for danger, I think you need IC to help you get your head on straight.

 

Things are very real, a life has been created amidst a bad situation. You must snap out of it,put those big girl panties on, and gave razor focus on what is best for your daughter. Love, acceptance, support, stability; this is all on you. ( and hopefully, whatever child support your attorney is able to get for your baby).

 

MM has told you repeatedly that he does not want to be a father to your baby. He sounds emotionally unstable, desperate, dangerous, and disrespectful.I can't get the thought of the booty calls in the car in his driveway while you were pregnant out of my head, what kind of man treats a pregnant woman this way???!!!! It makes me ill!!! :sick:You should be mad, not pining for him!!! You should realize he is a sperm donor, and does not deserve to be anywhere near your baby. Let him go! Let the attorneys deal with the money.

 

I have several family members who were raised by single moms, no dad in the picture, and have done ok. The key is, take care of you, be the best you , rid yourself of toxic people. You can't force a family relationship with MM and his family, so make your own: your family, friends, other support figures. Give that baby all the love and support you have, she'll be ok.

 

In a perfect world, MM will get his head out of his a**, man up to his family and you, and be a father for your child. Don't hold your breath. Just stay away from him and his mess. If that day comes, your attorney and any counselor you obtain should help you navigate all that.

 

Remember, in the airplane safety presentation, they always say get your own oxygen mask working before you attempt to help someone else. Such is life. Get yourself running properly, then you will be better able to help you daughter.

 

Good luck!

[Mayday2016]

Well, I just got a notification that his wife liked 2 of my photos of the baby. No message, just the two likes. I went to her profile and she updated her profile photo and cover photo of xMM and their daughter posed together. She updated them around the time she liked my Facebook wall photos of the baby. I feel like I'm going to get sick and I'm shaking.