Olie Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 I'm having conflicting feelings on something I did last year. I will make this as summarized as possible. Mid last year,I began suspecting my husband was cheating on me. I mean , he was constantly on his phone unlike before. He received suspecting calls at odd times and he made sure to leave the room if at all i was around then claiming it was "work call". My friend adviced I spy on him, I don't know why I listened to her but she made some compelling points then. She gave me an hackers mail who I contacted to clone my husband phone It seemed like the best decision then. I saw everything from the late night texts to the nude pictures everything .I cried for days . i didnt know my husband could be that romantic. I truly caught him without confronting him. I seeked out the lady he was cheating on me with and threatened her to stay off my family. I went to the extent of publicly humiliating her. I didn't confront my husband all these while .She broke it off but didn't tell my husband I was the cause. My husband suspected I had a hand in it but didn't have the courage to ask. Later on His attitude changed and he became more caring to me and his kids .God knows I didn't do all these just for myself , it was also for my kids. Who knows,he might have brought STD home from his infidelity. I still have the cloned phone. I couldnt get myself to destroy it. I'm confused. I think I have crossed the bridge of trust and can't get myself to come back again. What do I do . Link to post Share on other sites
moebius Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 I don't know if you could ever trust him again. But that won't happen if you don't confront him. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 What do you mean when you say you publicly humiliated the other woman? What did you do? I'm sure your husband knows that you know. It's time that both of you open up the communication in your marriage or you will never be able to rebuild it. Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 Confront him. Don't reveal your source. Just let him know that you Know not how you know. That's not important.. Cheaters generally will only admit to what they think they know the other spouse can prove. even then sometimes they won't and will go down in flames. The other woman is not the problem, it could have been anyone. It is your husband that is the problem. Decide what is a deal breaker for you and stick to your guns.If you don't he may very well manipulate you into sweeping this under the rug. Then it will only lead to the chance it will happen again. Just remember that if someone is not shown consequences for their actions they have no incentive to change their behavior. Good Luck. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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