ExtraSpice Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 I have heard the saying multiple times. And I was just curious as to how many people actually feel that way. After I experience something good, usually a slightly low feeling follows. Almost like a high and then a come down. When something good comes to an end, whether a relationship, friendship, one time date etc, how do you feel right after? Can you honestly say you feel happy or is the point that you will eventually feel happy about the good times in the past? Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 Right after, it's hard to think rationally if you weren't the one who wanted it to end. Even if you were, it can be hard to think logically. So no, in the heat of the moment, most people probably don't feel glad the relationship happened. With time, though, comes recovery and hopefully perspective. It's been a year since my relationship ended. In the time since, I've run the gamut of emotions. Never, though, did I really regret the relationship happening. It ran far past its course, but it taught me so much about myself and relationships. In wake of each breakup I've ever had, I've further refined what I want from a partner and a relationship. Each breakup has been a learning experience, and this last one is easily the "greatest" learning experience of them all. I learned much about myself during and after the relationship. It taught me that I want children of my own, when there was a time where I didn't think I did. I learned I'm not only capable of helping to raise a child, but pretty good at it, too. I learned that I have compassion in me for another young life that I didn't know was there. It taught me that I shouldn't ignore red flags because of some good times. It taught me that a relationship is truly a partnership that requires effort and dedication from both ends; relationships that end are rarely the efforts of just one person. Perhaps most importantly, I've learned that I'm emotionally and mentally equipped to endure a devastating life change; persevere and endure while I build a new life. There is a part of me that will probably always feel at least a tinge of sadness that this relationship didn't work out. That is one of the bittersweet truths of fully opening yourself up for another person; for the chance of love. None of these lessons have been without some struggle. But most of them are invaluable to me. And for that, I can't bring myself to sincerely regret that this relationship happened, or even that it ended. Because, in truth, it's been everything that's followed the ending that's really shown me what I'm made of. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ExtraSpice Posted January 25, 2016 Author Share Posted January 25, 2016 That is a very nice way to put it. It is very hard to concentrate on the positives right after an end to something good or bad. Personally I do not regret any of my past relationships. I regret certain things that happened or things I did but not the relationship itself. If anything I have grown as a result. I think my struggle is to deal with the present. I know that there will come a time when I will look back and be happy or content with the time spent. It is a silly feeling that I have as though I am failing at something just because I am not there yet or just because it is taking longer than I thought. Thank you for sharing your experience Blanco. It was good to read. Link to post Share on other sites
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