HokeyReligions Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 RAISING BOYS a) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical! b) For those who already have children past this age, this is hilarious. c) For those who have children this age, this is not funny. d) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning. e) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control. The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas who wants to share this with the world: Things I've learned from my Boys (not kidding): 1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep. 2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite. 3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant. 4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread Paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room. 5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way. 6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan. 7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late. 8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it. 9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies. 10.) Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old boy. 11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence. 12.) Super glue is forever. 13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water. 14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O. 15.) VCRs do not eject "PB &J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do. 16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes. 17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving. 18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is. 19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens. 20.) The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time. 21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy. 22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy. 23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy. 24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid. 25.) Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without kids. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 I have seen this before........and yes, clorox and brake fluid does smoke like crazy! Link to post Share on other sites
Author HokeyReligions Posted June 7, 2005 Author Share Posted June 7, 2005 I knew someone on here had to have tried that!!! I sent it to my old boss and he also confirmed that break fluid & bleach make an interesting combination. He then went on to tell me about other combinations that smoke, hiss, or blow-up! (I miss my old boss!!!) Boys!! I'm NOT going to share this one with MY husband! He's the Tim Taylor of the neighborhood! Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Another COOL mixture is if you're ever around dry ice pellets, (Especially on float trips), and you have access to those 20 ounce plastic pop containers.......fill it half full with water, drop in a dry ice pellet.....maybe 2 but no more than 3......cap it and put it close to someone.........then find somewhere else to be for about 40 seconds.......... ewww......ewwww......ewww here's another one........more helpfull though.........again, on a float trip or camping.....before you leave, get an empty 1lb. coffee can.....CAN.....key word is CAN......and a whole role of toilet paper......cut/remove cardboard core and stuff the entire roll in the can......slowly.......I repeat......slowly pour an entire pint of rubbing alcohol, (99% pure), into the can on top of the toilet paper role until the role soaks the whole pint. Cover with the plastic lid that usually comes with the can. You now have a portable stove, light source, heat source that'll last for three and half hours. I use them to start our camp fires and I keep one in the screen house when we eat to keep bugs out......it doesn't stink, won't spill and for some reason it repels bugs. Yes, us boys play, but........etch this into your mind and you'll always be prepared!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
BigB Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by HokeyReligions 24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid. I did that... my poor mom... just wait till they get older.. the wrecked cars, the late night girls, the drunken parties.., the arrests, bail money, cops at your door.. or maybe that was just me? Link to post Share on other sites
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 I just forwarded this around the office! Link to post Share on other sites
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