went back to his wife

[eliza89]

Just looking to get things off my chest as I feel like I can't tell any of my friends or family.

 

I'm sleeping with two MM.

One I have been seeing for 3 years. The sex is absolutely amazing. But it is all about sex he has never said he will leave his wife for me. I was fine with this but have been falling for him for the last few months. I won't day anything as I know he's only sleeping with me as he doesn't get any from his wife.

 

Then I met another MM about 3 months ago. This turned into an affair right away.we couldn't keep our hands off each other. The sex is not as good but he says he's not happy with his wife and will leave her one day.

This guy is amazing we talk all the time. He's taken me out for food unlike the other guy.this affair is definitely more emotional.

I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to keep on sleeping with two MM but I can't finish it with any of them.

When mm number 2 stays the night it's amazing but when he goes home I realise how lonely I am ?.

[TaraMaiden2]

Only one part of your post does not ring true:

Just looking to get things off my chest as I feel like I can't tell any of my friends or family.

 

I'm sleeping with two MM.

One I have been seeing for 3 years. The sex is absolutely amazing. But it is all about sex he has never said he will leave his wife for me. I was fine with this but have been falling for him for the last few months. I won't day anything as I know he's only sleeping with me as he doesn't get any from his wife.

 

Then I met another MM about 3 months ago. This turned into an affair right away.we couldn't keep our hands off each other. The sex is not as good but he says he's not happy with his wife and will leave her one day.

This guy is amazing we talk all the time. He's taken me out for food unlike the other guy.this affair is definitely more emotional.

I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to keep on sleeping with two MM but I can't finish it with any of them.

When mm number 2 stays the night it's amazing but when he goes home I realise how lonely I am .

That part.

 

What you MEANT to write was -

 

"I don't want to keep sleeping with two MM but I have little or no inclination to stop. "

 

Also, I don't think you're only sleeping, right?

 

Do they know about each other?

If not, telling them would be a sure-fire way of ending it with one of them, at least.

[Popsicle]

Neither one of them are going to leave their wife for you. It's just that one is honest about it and the other one isn't.

 

As for sleeping with 2 MM at the same time, there are no rules in affairs. Do as you please, but stop doing it if you're not enjoying it.

[eliza89]

They don't know about each other. I would never tell them. They both knew about my oh. (The relationship ended 2 months ago).

It didn't really bother me when I had a partner but now I'm single I feel lonely and I feel more guilty about it which is weird.

[brothers343]

Your having an affair with two man. Right now is fun but soon your path is going to turn dark. There will be no windows or doors you can get out from and the beginning of real nightmare will start. And your ( twice the fun) will become twice the hell. Plus neither is going to leave there wives. I know i wouldn't!!

[TaraMaiden2]

They don't know about each other. I would never tell them. They both knew about my oh. (The relationship ended 2 months ago).

It didn't really bother me when I had a partner but now I'm single I feel lonely and I feel more guilty about it which is weird.

 

So you're staying in two potentially soul-destroying, toxic, unproductive relationships - because you're lonely?

 

I'm sorry, but there are other ways of staving off loneliness AND maintaining your dignity.

This is doing neither.

 

You CAN get out.

you just need to see how bad this situation is, and stop it from getting worse....

[sandylee1]

Once you're sleeping with one MM what difference does another one make....... Except for the potential Std's sharing all these bodily fluids.

 

That's a minimum of 5 people sharing semen and vaginal fluids... plus any other OWs they may have on the side.. and let's not discount the possibility that either of the wives could be cheating too..... and with other MM who are sleeping with their wives too... you get the gist of what I'm saying.

 

 

Of course if your using condoms .... forget the above... no need to worry.... but it's very rare that people in affairs use protection..very rare IME.

 

Have you ever thought of leaving both of them and hooking up with a single guy?

[eliza89]

They have both told me they are not sleeping with anyone else. I don't use protection ad I trust them.

[Michelle ma Belle]

They don't know about each other. I would never tell them. They both knew about my oh. (The relationship ended 2 months ago).

It didn't really bother me when I had a partner but now I'm single I feel lonely and I feel more guilty about it which is weird.

 

So if you weren't single and still f*cking these married me you would feel less guilt???

 

I'm sorry but that's messed up.

[dreamingoftigers]

I don't use protection as I'm the only woman they are both sleeping with and I trust them.

 

And their wives trust them too. See how that works.

 

Jeez, to think use paper towels to open public bathroom doors when I am done.....

[Doublegold]

Dear take some time to be alone. Feeling lonely and being alone are two different things. Take some time to be alone. instead of having two MM take from you and leave you feeling lonely.

 

Take Care.

Edited January 10, 2016 by Doublegold

[Sassy Girl]

They have both told me they are not sleeping with anyone else. I don't use protection ad I trust them.

 

The same way they trust you?

 

The same way their wives trust them..

 

Seriously?

What are you looking for here?

 

What do you want out of life? Career? Loving authentic relationship? A family?

 

What are your goals? Whatever they are, I doubt you're on the path to achieving them. Quite the opposite. Good luck with that.

[Sassy Girl]

Once you're sleeping with one MM what difference does another one make....... Except for the potential Std's sharing all these bodily fluids.

 

That's a minimum of 5 people sharing semen and vaginal fluids... plus any other OWs they may have on the side.. and let's not discount the possibility that either of the wives could be cheating too..... and with other MM who are sleeping with their wives too... you get the gist of what I'm saying.

 

 

Of course if your using condoms .... forget the above... no need to worry.... but it's very rare that people in affairs use protection..very rare IME.

 

Have you ever thought of leaving both of them and hooking up with a single guy?

 

Good call about the 5 people... That we know of.

 

Ew. Just eww.

[MJJean]

I don't use protection as I'm the only woman they are both sleeping with and I trust them.

 

You're lying to and betraying two men. Each of those men is lying to and betraying his wife. And you're here speaking of trust?

 

 

BTW, you do now that sex makes babies, right? And you're having unprotected sex with two men. Just sayin.

[Red123]

You're lying to and betraying two men. Each of those men is lying to and betraying his wife. And you're here speaking of trust?

 

 

BTW, you do now that sex makes babies, right? And you're having unprotected sex with two men. Just sayin.

 

Just to add, they are both probably sleeping with their wives, so your not the only one.

[Maddieandtae]

Eliza do you think you can work at implementing no contact with these men so that you can start clearing your head on why you are putting yourself in a no win situation? Unfortunately you are in a position where when the affairs are discovered you will be in a whole heap of drama. You are certainly not the only one responsible for engaging in an affair although you are soley responsible for the triangle you have created! The loneliness you are feeling could be part from being in two unsatisfactory situations. I think though if you could talk with an counsellor you could get some insight on what's really going on with you:)

[AlwaysGrowing]

Getting this off your chest is not going to help you.

 

Just posting on an OW forum is not going to help you.

 

You need to get yourself into IC.

 

From the outside it seems like you have unresolved childhood issues that play heavily on how you view love, sex, relationships and yourself.

[whichwayisup]

Just looking to get things off my chest as I feel like I can't tell any of my friends or family.

 

I'm sleeping with two MM.

One I have been seeing for 3 years. The sex is absolutely amazing. But it is all about sex he has never said he will leave his wife for me. I was fine with this but have been falling for him for the last few months. I won't day anything as I know he's only sleeping with me as he doesn't get any from his wife.

 

Then I met another MM about 3 months ago. This turned into an affair right away.we couldn't keep our hands off each other. The sex is not as good but he says he's not happy with his wife and will leave her one day.

This guy is amazing we talk all the time. He's taken me out for food unlike the other guy.this affair is definitely more emotional.

I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to keep on sleeping with two MM but I can't finish it with any of them.

When mm number 2 stays the night it's amazing but when he goes home I realise how lonely I am ?.

 

Respectfully I ask... Do you love and respect yourself? It's one thing to have an A with a MM you're in love with and hope for a future it's another to have TWO affairs and still feel lonely and alone. Are you truly happy? Are you getting enough from these two MM to fulfill all your needs? My guess is no.....

 

I hope you'd want a (single) great guy ALL for yourself and not be put second fiddle by having affairs with MM. May the future include ridding of these two men and finding someone who will love only you and someone you can build a life with and not have to share.

[whichwayisup]

They have both told me they are not sleeping with anyone else. I don't use protection ad I trust them.

 

Yet you are sleeping with two MM who don't know about each other. They trust you that you are faithful and when in fact you're not. You're exposing YOURSELF to STD's!

 

Eliza, the more I read, the more I see self disrespect and not much love for yourself.

 

I hope you go talk to someone, get to counseling to help you find a healthier life and for to make better choices for yourself.

[avintagegirl]

They have both told me they are not sleeping with anyone else. I don't use protection ad I trust them.

 

I don't use protection as I'm the only woman they are both sleeping with and I trust them.

 

They are lying with their wives to be with you, right?

 

One of my friends slept with a married man who made the same claims you are. They actually married. Seven years later she divorced him on grounds of adultery because he gave the same line to someone else he gave to her.

 

Give both of them up and figure out your own self.

 

Relationships are supposed to be mutually beneficial, not only are you not getting anything (except a potential STD) but this kind of relationship can have serious consequences. The kind of consequences that aren't worth the value that any one of the three of you is giving this relationship.

[ShatteredLady]

Can I please ask how old you are? Do you have kids?

 

Did your relationship end because your affair was discovered? I was wondering if seeing the actual agony that infidelity causes could of effected you. Making you suddenly start having feelings after all this time etc. know what I mean?

[sandylee1]

It IS very rare..because they 'trust' each other.

 

When they're engaging in all that wild passionate affair sex common sense goes out of the window and a condom would just be too much hassle and spoil the fun

 

Affairs are wreckless.. why would they take the time to be careful using condoms....nah..that kills the mood and means being careful moving from one position to the next.

You don't have an affair just for plain old vanilla sex.

 

After all 'their not sleeping with their spouses' are they .... so no need to worry about Std's.

Edited January 11, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Popsicle]

They don't know about each other. I would never tell them. They both knew about my oh. (The relationship ended 2 months ago).

It didn't really bother me when I had a partner but now I'm single I feel lonely and I feel more guilty about it which is weird.

 

It's not weird. It just means you crave a real full-time relationship (which you WONT get from either MM btw).

[burnt]

It's not weird. It just means you crave a real full-time relationship (which you WONT get from either MM btw).

 

100% agree. That's exactly what I read here too.

 

Op, I get the sense you are just lost, looking to find yourself, looking for something real, but looking in the totally wrong place; you know that what you got yourself into is not the solution, but detaching yourself from all this mess is where you are having a hard time.

 

Getting this off your chest is not going to help you.

Just posting on an OW forum is not going to help you.

You need to get yourself into IC.

From the outside it seems like you have unresolved childhood issues that play heavily on how you view love, sex, relationships and yourself.

 

Getting this off your chest in this forum is a good start and it WILL help you to some degree to clear your head and get others' perspective.

But, yes, you should seek help of individual counseling. Especially since you are unable to talk to anyone in person about all this, psychologically it's getting to be too much for you to carry. We all can offer opinions here, but you really do need someone to lean on for support right now.

 

You are turning yourself into a ping-pong ball between these two men--what's missing in MM#1, you are fulfilling from the MM#2, and what's missing in MM#2 puts you back into the hands of MM#1.

 

The moment one goes wrong, the other will also fall apart and you will feel the hit coming from TWO traumas at the same time.

 

Surviving one heartbreak is devastating enough--two?

 

Hey, I'm sorry for what you got yourself into. I feel for your pain and your confusion and frustration. It's a lot you're going through.

 

But cut both MM out--to save yourself from enormous pain. You know you don't have a choice.

 

I wish you the best to find a way out soon and start to heal.

[Shadowburn]

This is a terrible situation that spells nothing but heartbreak for you.

Two broken relationships won't make one whole.

Lose them both, take some time to compose yourself, find some answers why would you get yourself in such a harmful situation and start anew with someone single, who won't use you and then will leave you, feeling empty and lonely.