Ms. Faust Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 (edited) What lemondrop means to say is... some of these posts ARE harsh because people take out their own problems on others and have no problem with it. Take what helps, leave.the rest. Try to be kind to yourself right now. Loss is always hard. Xx Actually, none of the posts are harsh. In fact, between the original post and when you posted, they are quite coddling. If anything, some people (very few, actually) are asking the OP blunt questions she should ask herself, which is true considering the situation. She is a grown woman who has had unprotected sex with two married man AND a boyfriend up until recently, and is lying to everyone. Of course people are going to say "whaaaat are you doing????" of course people are going to say "find your dignity!" because it's true, she does need to find her dignity. If anyone is projecting it is overly sensitive OW/M who feel the need to coo and coodle and kiss the boo-boos of every AP who comes in here who have made one extreme bad decision after the other. At the very least it is the pot meeting the kettle. Edited January 30, 2016 by Ms. Faust 9 Link to post Share on other sites
ShatteredLady Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 How many children does this guy have? How old are they? I got the impression that he has a pretty new baby. Stress, crying, sleep deprivation & lack of sex after the birth of a baby can make some men do dispicable things. Were you having the affair while she was pregnant? If not, how long after the birth of the baby did you start? Please guard your heart & tread carefully. If she's still breast feeding he's not going to get much visitation with his baby. Oh for goodness sake!!! Is this REALLY the kind of 'man' you want to spend your life with? Even if that's a real option...most go back home with their tails between their legs & their poor wives are so messed-up with new baby that they take them back. Ugh!! This is so sad. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ShatteredLady Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 He wasn't only married, he was also cheating on BOTH of you with another woman!! How old is his baby? Did he leave his wife or did she wonder where he was that weekend, investigate & throw him out? If you had the slightest idea of the agony you are complicit in causing for all of these people you wouldn't be feeling sorry for yourself. You'd be vowing to NEVER do this again. You'd be getting mental health care. You'd be staying away from men while you get yourself sorted out. You have sunk so low. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE STOP!!! Before you continue with this yoyo game or run back to MM1 or find MM3.... Read some of the infidelity threads. If you're going to continue at least educate yourself. See what you're inflicting on your victims. I've read your posts. People have tried to 'nice' you out of your crime spree & it's clearly not working! My brother took his life over adultery. I'm a shell of the person I was before my H ripped my heart out. Usually I'm empathic & care about all people's suffering & to be honest I do pity you BUT you show utter contempt for the women & children who's lives your sharing in the destruction of.... When I think of the utter agony his wife has experienced, abused & abandoned whilst nurturing a young baby & compare it to your joyful realization that he can be a good shag over ONE weekend (before then he was good to talk to but MM1 was no.1 because of his sexual prowess) & now pain because he's gone home to abuse her some more. Ugh!!! WAKE UP!! These are real people's lives. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Privatelover01 Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 Sorry to hear this. Although my mm ended our relationship to focus on his family. I feel like mm who cheat are very conflicted. I'm sure he feels going back to do the right thing. But this won't last because he's ultimately conflicted and probably unhappy. He's probably not sure if he wants ultimate happiness or the life he's come to known. I wish u well. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted January 31, 2016 Share Posted January 31, 2016 Well he left his wife. It wasn't pleasent for anyone. If I'm honest I didn't think he would but his marriage was over before I came along so think this is the right thing for him to do. Not just for his sake but for his wife's. Obviously this isn't going to be an easy ride but he is definitely the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. I thought he couldn't leave because he was worried about his kids finances. Oh well, more lies from MM. Link to post Share on other sites
Patrice Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 If they want to leave, and if the marriage is THAT bad - they would leave. Any self-respecting honest person would do that. To do this to YOU and his wife? When does honesty and self-respect enter the building, and what would you accept from people - who are neither? I am on the otherside of this ... take time to figure out yourself, and why you are accepting this. MM lie, that's what they do - there is no LOVE involved, they are selfish. They want to remain where they are comfortable, and get the thrill on the side - why would YOU accept that kind of relationship. Your focus needs to be on you now. Cut them both off, and fix you. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
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