ShatteredLady Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 I just wanted to say "I know how you feel. I'm so sorry". I think I've reached a similar position. We're returning home to England. That's a logistical nightmare! We're going to sell, dump a lifetimes worth of 'stuff'. Stuff that meant so much to me. We're selling my dream house...that's been ruined by nightmares. Even the flight terrifies me with my health & pain. All that matters now is my babies. We need to be home with family & friends. Before d-day I had no idea how completely vulnerable I'd made myself. I gave everything too my H. He has all the power. He can walk out the door & leave us destitute on a whim or OW. It's me that has the health situation (not my Mum). For me it's this reminder of how fragile life is. How fragile everything is. I don't even have control over my body, let alone my life. It's just one step at a time right now.... When D-day (the first one!) hit I was already broken & depressed, recovering from surgery. I was completely overwhelmed! Even breathing took more effort than I felt I had. Now things have calmed. I don't know any of the answers but I've figured out the most important question for ME.... What life do I want for me & my kids? ...I figure "Bodies rest & motion", I just need "motion", change begets change. I don't want this life... I need safety, security, unconditional love so it's HOME to my parents for me. Then???? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mrs. John Adams Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 I just wanted to say "I know how you feel. I'm so sorry". I think I've reached a similar position. We're returning home to England. That's a logistical nightmare! We're going to sell, dump a lifetimes worth of 'stuff'. Stuff that meant so much to me. We're selling my dream house...that's been ruined by nightmares. Even the flight terrifies me with my health & pain. All that matters now is my babies. We need to be home with family & friends. Before d-day I had no idea how completely vulnerable I'd made myself. I gave everything too my H. He has all the power. He can walk out the door & leave us destitute on a whim or OW. It's me that has the health situation (not my Mum). For me it's this reminder of how fragile life is. How fragile everything is. I don't even have control over my body, let alone my life. It's just one step at a time right now.... When D-day (the first one!) hit I was already broken & depressed, recovering from surgery. I was completely overwhelmed! Even breathing took more effort than I felt I had. Now things have calmed. I don't know any of the answers but I've figured out the most important question for ME.... What life do I want for me & my kids? ...I figure "Bodies rest & motion", I just need "motion", change begets change. I don't want this life... I need safety, security, unconditional love so it's HOME to my parents for me. Then???? I am so glad you have made this decision....and I know what i think is not important...but I do think this is the best answer for you. You need rest.....where better to do that than with your family. All you have here is him....and he has proven he could walk anytime. I might be very good to get him back to family as well. This is a good thing SL....rest your mind love...and press forward with your plan....soon you will be in your mum's arms something you have needed for a long time. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Cloudcuckoo Posted March 8, 2016 Share Posted March 8, 2016 I just wanted to say "I know how you feel. I'm so sorry". I think I've reached a similar position. We're returning home to England. That's a logistical nightmare! We're going to sell, dump a lifetimes worth of 'stuff'. Stuff that meant so much to me. We're selling my dream house...that's been ruined by nightmares. Even the flight terrifies me with my health & pain. All that matters now is my babies. We need to be home with family & friends. Before d-day I had no idea how completely vulnerable I'd made myself. I gave everything too my H. He has all the power. He can walk out the door & leave us destitute on a whim or OW. It's me that has the health situation (not my Mum). For me it's this reminder of how fragile life is. How fragile everything is. I don't even have control over my body, let alone my life. It's just one step at a time right now.... When D-day (the first one!) hit I was already broken & depressed, recovering from surgery. I was completely overwhelmed! Even breathing took more effort than I felt I had. Now things have calmed. I don't know any of the answers but I've figured out the most important question for ME.... What life do I want for me & my kids? ...I figure "Bodies rest & motion", I just need "motion", change begets change. I don't want this life... I need safety, security, unconditional love so it's HOME to my parents for me. Then???? I do hope you will at last feel some sense of safety when you get home to the warmth and security of family shattered, and I believe you have greater inner strength than you warrant yourself. To have come this far with all your health concerns and in isolation from those who care and love you most is a reflection of your tenacity and your will to survive such a terrible time. My sincere best wishes to you and a safe return home. Cuckoo x 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author weeble78 Posted March 9, 2016 Author Share Posted March 9, 2016 I just wanted to say "I know how you feel. I'm so sorry". I think I've reached a similar position. We're returning home to England. That's a logistical nightmare! We're going to sell, dump a lifetimes worth of 'stuff'. Stuff that meant so much to me. We're selling my dream house...that's been ruined by nightmares. Even the flight terrifies me with my health & pain. All that matters now is my babies. We need to be home with family & friends. Before d-day I had no idea how completely vulnerable I'd made myself. I gave everything too my H. He has all the power. He can walk out the door & leave us destitute on a whim or OW. It's me that has the health situation (not my Mum). For me it's this reminder of how fragile life is. How fragile everything is. I don't even have control over my body, let alone my life. It's just one step at a time right now.... When D-day (the first one!) hit I was already broken & depressed, recovering from surgery. I was completely overwhelmed! Even breathing took more effort than I felt I had. Now things have calmed. I don't know any of the answers but I've figured out the most important question for ME.... What life do I want for me & my kids? ...I figure "Bodies rest & motion", I just need "motion", change begets change. I don't want this life... I need safety, security, unconditional love so it's HOME to my parents for me. Then???? I think you will never regret moving to be with family and friends. They will reaffirm your decision and give you that extra bit of strength to pull you up and help you get back on your feet. All that power is yours, and you just feel like your H took it all. You will be a much stronger person because of this. It may take time but you will definitely look back on this in the future and be proud of the decisions you are making today. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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