guest Posted June 11, 2005 Share Posted June 11, 2005 well, in a nutshell,. . my girlfriend has been friends with a guy that lives far away. She knew him before me but only a little bit before. She met him at a confrence somewhere and they remained in contact through email. well apparently he was in the area and asked if it would be cool to visit. She said sure and sense he would have no where to stay they came up with this idea of camping. Now she is at school now doing work study program and she invited some of the other people in her program. So, 3 of them are taking off and meeting this guy camping like 3 hours away. I guess my concern is that it seems odd to keep in touch with someone just after a conference. They cant know each other that well, just emails. She says they just talk about politics alot and i should not worry. She says nothing has ever happened with this guy..ever. They are just friends she says. she says she loves me and wishes i could come along but i have to work. I know she is a very people person,. she has alot of friends and remains friends with people all over the place. I Guess, Im a more couple friends person and I usually wouldnt keep a long distance girl contact that I didn't view as more then a possible friend. Its hard to see past this for me. I dont know, plus it seems, I Mean, I may have a bit of jealousy but usually im pretty good....you want to have coffee with some guy friend .....no problem/.....i like to have coffee with some girl friends i know...........I just always seem to get the X-treme case of girls that want to go camping with some guy from far away and im supposed to understand it.............yea right! any thoughts Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted June 11, 2005 Share Posted June 11, 2005 I would feel uncomfortable with that and Im a girl. I also don't camp....don't know if that has anything to do with it or not. Does she camp with other people too? I would ask her if you can come along too to make sure there is no funny business. I would ask her if anyone else is going to be there...if the answer is no, i would be very concerned. I would suggest you go with them too. I mean I think she might have friendship intentions...and he might too...but its possible he just wants to get her nekid. of course, then again, they could be just friends and don't see it as anything more than that... I wouldn't want to put ideas in her head if i were you...she might start thinking about him in that way...which is the last thing you want...but if she is grossed out by him....that would be a good way to turn her off and make her not want to go...but then your still making her think about him in a sexual way...which you don't want to do. Its also possible tha tyou are jealous because you are feeling left out in not being invited. Just something to think about...I would feel that way too if it were me. Link to post Share on other sites
reservoirdog1 Posted June 11, 2005 Share Posted June 11, 2005 I say you get done with your work, and then get in your car and drive to where they're camping, on the pretense of surprising her. If she's genuinely just going there camping with him on a platonic basis, then you've surprised her and she'll probably find it romantic. If there's something iffy going on, then you should be able to determine that by her reaction upon you showing up. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted June 12, 2005 Share Posted June 12, 2005 Hahaha! I would feel exactly like you cuz I am a jealous ball myself. But I think you have nothing to worry about. They are practically email friends, not close friends since that conference. I have close email friends I've never met in person. Secondly, other people are going camping too and your GF invited you as well. She loves you and told you not to worry so don't worry! Just remove it from your head cuz there is nothing bad going on. Imagine that this guy is a girl. Feel free to ask her questions about him such as how she feels for him, does she find him attractive, cute, charming, etc. Her answers will help you figure out whether she has some feelings for him or not. Link to post Share on other sites
guest Posted June 12, 2005 Share Posted June 12, 2005 yeah, Ive thought about going there but then,....i dont know. I Know I would feel ackward like they knew I was there checking on them. . . and she would know for sure based on my hectic work schedule. I work 16 hours today until 1100 pm and then have to be back tomorrow at 630. I really dont have time for a fun adventure....it would be immediately seen for what it was....me doubting her. Still, sometimes that half gets the best of me and I end up on the road in the middle of the night going god knows where to find out god knows what........shaking the whole time.....sigh Link to post Share on other sites
Sal Paradise Posted June 12, 2005 Share Posted June 12, 2005 She is probably cheating on you. The reason for the camping is so they can be alone together. Hell I wouldn't be suprised if they're the only one's there. I would definately check up on her. Actually I'd bring a tent and stay there with them. Who cares if you put her in an awkward situation, look at the situation she put you in? If nothing is really going in then she or he shouldn't mind you being there. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted June 12, 2005 Share Posted June 12, 2005 Camping with her "friend" is no big deal. If the sleeping bag gets torn, they'll just use the other one. Don't worry, they'll fit somehow. Link to post Share on other sites
Cecelius Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 I'm shaky on this one, because its a group (not bad) but a guy she doesn't really know that well (bad). You are correct that this guy would, at a minimum, probably hook up with her if the situation is right (not saying that he's pursuing her, but if the moment is right, she's tipsy, etc., things could go bad). I think the situation is not appropriate, and you should simply tell her that. Her reaction will let you know where you stand Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 Originally posted by guest She says they just talk about politics alot and i should not worry. She says nothing has ever happened with this guy..ever. They are just friends she says. They probably talk about sports, too... over a nice, warm fire, away from the others. Link to post Share on other sites
ImaManDammit Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 This has outdoor sexfest written all over it. Trust shmust. She goes end it. A guy and girl go camping........sounds like the beginning of a dirty joke. Clang! Clang! Wake up call. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 Originally posted by ImaManDammit This has outdoor sexfest written all over it. Trust shmust. She goes end it. A guy and girl go camping........sounds like the beginning of a dirty joke. Clang! Clang! Wake up call. If only I could be Jason from "Friday the 13th" in situations like this... Link to post Share on other sites
ImaManDammit Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 Originally posted by westernxer If only I could be Jason from "Friday the 13th" in situations like this... I can see it now. "Oh my, that's a big machetti you have there". <<cue the 70's music>> Not to make too much light of this guy's perdicament, but its almost comically how anyone would think they would be comfortable with their SO going camping with the opposite sex........boggles the mind. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 A cruise to the Bahamas is next on the list, but only because they like to talk politics. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ImaManDammit Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 Then a trip to a singles bar to write a thesis on human interaction. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
tanbark813 Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 Originally posted by westernxer A cruise to the Bahamas is next on the list, but only because they like to talk politics. Originally posted by ImaManDammit Then a trip to a singles bar to write a thesis on human interaction. It's funny because it's true. Link to post Share on other sites
crazy_grl Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 What's the big deal? She goes camping all the time right? With her girl friends, with you, with her family. What? She doesn't? Color me shocked. "Oh, honey. It's such a shame you can't make it because you have to work. I guess that means it'll just be the two of us.... Oh, I mean the 5 of us. I'm inviting some friends. (Who don't give a rats ass whether I cheat on you and wouldn't tell you if I did. But I'll let you (and maybe myself) believe they'll keep something from happening.) "We're just friends who've met once and talk about politics. (It's too bad we weren't able to get together before now instead of just emailing. Too bad I have a boyfriend now. Well, really I wouldn't fight him off if he made a move in the tent. Good thing you have to work.) "I just want to get together and have fun with my friends. (And the kind of fun I'm hoping to have couldn't be done over dinner. Even if I've convinced myself and you otherwise.)" Link to post Share on other sites
TheTruth Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Originally posted by guest well, in a nutshell,. . my girlfriend has been friends with a guy that lives far away. She knew him before me but only a little bit before. She met him at a confrence somewhere and they remained in contact through email. well apparently he was in the area and asked if it would be cool to visit. She said sure and sense he would have no where to stay they came up with this idea of camping. Now she is at school now doing work study program and she invited some of the other people in her program. So, 3 of them are taking off and meeting this guy camping like 3 hours away. I guess my concern is that it seems odd to keep in touch with someone just after a conference. They cant know each other that well, just emails. She says they just talk about politics alot and i should not worry. She says nothing has ever happened with this guy..ever. They are just friends she says. she says she loves me and wishes i could come along but i have to work. I know she is a very people person,. she has alot of friends and remains friends with people all over the place. I Guess, Im a more couple friends person and I usually wouldnt keep a long distance girl contact that I didn't view as more then a possible friend. Its hard to see past this for me. I dont know, plus it seems, I Mean, I may have a bit of jealousy but usually im pretty good....you want to have coffee with some guy friend .....no problem/.....i like to have coffee with some girl friends i know...........I just always seem to get the X-treme case of girls that want to go camping with some guy from far away and im supposed to understand it.............yea right! any thoughts 1. What your thinking is exactly what is likely going to happen. The two of them out in the woods alone without you, and before you know it, she got his penis in her mouth. 2. Just dump her, you dont know how many dudes balls your tasting everytime you kiss her 3. Go screw her friends, you would be happier anyway, and hopefully one of them can end up being a loyal girlfriend 4. That guy camping with her is likely thinking what an idiot you would be to think their not doing anything. Your girlfriend and this guy is probrably going to laugh at how stupid you are for believing her if you let this camp trip happen 5. Your girlfriends a slut. Most girls who give the excuse of "Im just friendly" are sluts, especially if all their friends are guys. It gives them reason to flirt and screw every guy who comes their way without you knowing. Screwing these type of girls is like swinging a baseball bat inside the subway tunnels, you wont hit nothing but air. Link to post Share on other sites
shamen Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Wow, the last post is scary... I've been going camping for years with friends, of both sexes. I'm a woman. I've never dated another guy who goes camping for some reason. So, I've got a set group of camping friends. I'm going camping this summer with a male friend of mine (yep, just me and him) and my (relatively new) beau is totally cool with it. My beau doesn't camp, isn't interested in it and he's happy that I have friends that will do this with me. I've gone camping with this guy before. My male friend that I'm going camping with has a gf too and she's met me. She's also totally cool with him going with me. If the guy that I was dating was uncool with it, I would probably tell him so long because I'm certainly not going to stop doing one of my favorite activities because the guy that I happen to be dating doesn't trust me. Ridiculous. My favorite pastime is infinitely more important than any current beau. When they start dating me, they find out quickly that I go camping with both men and women. So, it's out there soon enough... You never know. So, guest, it could be totally innocent. Just my experience with it. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Originally posted by shamen I'm going camping this summer with a male friend of mine (yep, just me and him) and my (relatively new) beau is totally cool with it. Something's gonna happen. Wait and see. Link to post Share on other sites
shamen Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Between whom? Guest and his gf? My male friend of 8 years and I (ha!)? My beau and I? Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Male friend my ass. Says you. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 No, not me yessiree. Beside the lake for Heaven's sake he's just a "friend." Link to post Share on other sites
shamen Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 OK, Westernxer, you're scaring me. Please play nice. I usually enjoy reading your posts. I find it interesting that you've judged my relationship with this male friend of mine, whom I've known and spent time with for years, who I've never slept with, who I've never had a desire to sleep with. We've gone on countless trips together in the last 3 years. Nothing has ever happened and nothing ever will. He's one of my best friends. So, did some ex gf of yours cheat on you or something? Why does there have to be some alternative motive to a camping trip? Or maybe you don't believe that women and men can be platonic friends? Now, in guest's situation, it certainly does depend on how often the girl goes camping. I mean, if she doesn't go camping all of the time, then that's different. But, this is something I do probably 8 times a year... Link to post Share on other sites
shamen Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Originally posted by westernxer No, not me yessiree. Beside the lake for Heaven's sake he's just a "friend." Maybe you missed the part in my first post where I said that I've been going camping with this guy for years... The thought of sleeping with this guy disgusts me. My previous post was put up before I saw your new post (above)... so, obviously you do not believe in platonic friendships between men and women. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Originally posted by shamen So, did some ex gf of yours cheat on you or something? Not yet. Why does there have to be some alternative motive to a camping trip? Because he's a guy. Or maybe you don't believe that women and men can be platonic friends? They can't. One is bound to like the other. It gets proven time and time again. The thought of sleeping with this guy disgusts me. Of course, which is why you have no problem camping with him. I'll bet you anything he doesn't feel the same way. In fact, I bet he's hoping you climb out of your sleeping back to unzip his pants in the middle of the night. No doubt he's a gentleman, but I know what he's thinking. Guys know how other guys think... that's why we're reacting the way we do. Because we're all looking for chicks, and the patterns repeat themselves over and over again, without respect to culture, clime, or country. Please don't take offense to what I say. I think you're a cool gal, regardless of whether or not I give you a hard time. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts