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Not coping well tonight. [updated]


Mr. Disposable

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Mr. Disposable
fair enough. I was just curious. good luck to you

 

May I ask why you asked that question?

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bluefeather
May I ask why you asked that question?

 

I wondered if loneliness was a strong factor in causing you to continue this, for lack of a better word, obsession. But because of the reason that you gave for not dating yet, maybe it wasn't.

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Thanks man. I really appreciate you responding. My heads a goddamn mess today.

 

My weekend was a crazy, blurry mess. Panic attacks, no sleep, drinking, trying to tell a family member that I feel like I'm falling to pieces, and then topping it all off by basically spilling my guts about some feelings to a coworker, while tipsy, at midnight.

 

I don't know what compels me to do the dumb sh*t I do sometimes :o

 

I'm feeling sick and tired this morning. Kinda just wanna get away from all of the big life changes on the horizon today. Just not coping well.

 

It will get better. Today, I actually feel pretty damn good. I found out my ex is doing well. she doesn't even care she dumped me and all the mean things she did and said. Nothing. she got over me real quick.

 

so I said to myself today out loud, at work, shes out there having fun, having no remorse on what she did, living life and I am suffering inside bc I lost the girl I loved. No enough. Now because I found it, believe it or not, its like closure for me. Now I know for a fact, she never cared nor cares at this point in her life anymore. I am just a number. I feel so so so so so bad for the next guy to come in her life.

 

will I relapse again? maybe. But today, I am riding out my energy and happiness and taking advantage of it.

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