franik Posted June 12, 2005 Share Posted June 12, 2005 OK, I have this problem. There is this girl who I met because she is my sister's best friend. This girl is perfect for me. We have so much in common like musical tastes, we both do theatre, and we have a great time together. She is living with my family and me through the summer because school is out. She is not your typical girl, she game from an emotionally unstable background and she was almost always had a boyfriend since she was 15. This does not bother me. She and I have become good friends, but she is giving me mixed signals. We will be hanging out by my pool soaking up some sun and she is laughing at what I have to say. She has told me that I give the best massages she has ever received, professional or amateur. Other times she will dismiss the conversation I try to start with a one or two word answer. This usually results in a few moments of silence which is surprisingly comfortable. We have the best times drinking together and it is so much fun, but I do not drink to often. She also keeps telling me that she wants to do the single thing. She rarely tries to make conversation other than to smoke a cigarette. She is an amazing person to be around and every time I see her, even on my worst day, she makes it worlds better. I am terrified to tell her how I fell because I feel she will just want to be friends, and or not want to me friends anymore… I have takes a few classes on interpersonal communication and I am still at a loss. I don’t know whether or not to tell her, or kiss her. I may not have another chance to kiss her if it turns out she just wants to be friends. Oh, and there is a slight other twist she really likes this guy who is over 2000 miles a way and will be for years because of the Marines. It seems she talks to him more over the phone than she likes talking with me. The sad thing is that he has told her to not wait for him and to live her own life. Please someone help me figure out what is the best coarse of action and if there is any chance I might be able to one day be more than friends. Thank you much Link to post Share on other sites
Curt Posted June 12, 2005 Moderators Share Posted June 12, 2005 You noted the following: "She also keeps telling me that she wants to do the single thing. She rarely tries to make conversation other than to smoke a cigarette." IHHO, she is not into you. Find a gal that wants your love completely. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted June 12, 2005 Share Posted June 12, 2005 I agree with Curt and add your other quote: It seems she talks to him more over the phone than she likes talking with me and I wonder how it is you've determined she's such a wonderful person. You need to be able to converse with someone you spend time with. This lady doesn't appear willing or interested to talk to you much and I don't think she's all that interested. Sorry to say, but I think it would be wasting your time to wait for her. Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted June 12, 2005 Share Posted June 12, 2005 She told you that she is interested in the 'single' thing, and likes someone else. All the rest is just her soaking up your attention, and backing off when she senses you are making more out of it than she wants you to. If you did get a chance to kiss her, it wouldn't be long before you get dealt the 'friend' card. You can't get dealt the 'friends card' if you aren't playing the game though. Best to just back away slowly, and turn off the charm. If she asks 'what's wrong' (and she will when she sees that her opportunities for ego stroking are fading) just tell her 'nothing' and cut any future conversations short. I'm sure she knows how you feel, and the fact that she isn't 'going for it' tells you all you pretty much need to know. She's accepting your attention, but it doesn't sound like she's in the market to return it. You can always take the chance and tell her and hope to get a kiss out of it and see where it goes, but I don't see it going much further than an awkward conversation afterward. Will you ever have a chance? Who knows.. maybe one day she will decide to date you, but right now she doesn't sound overly interested. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted June 12, 2005 Share Posted June 12, 2005 I dont think she is interested in you....I think she is interested in the man 2000 miles away.... Just because you think the world of her and think she is perfect and lovely and everything you are looking for ....it does not mean she feels the same. Dont mean to be cruel. Just want you to wake up and smell the other flowers in the field....This flower is taken..... She talks better with him than you....sigh...sorry its turning out this way for you. Their are other beautiful women out there that would be willing to give you 110% of their time and attention. Its just not *this* one...... Link to post Share on other sites
Trae Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 I understand what your feeling with the ladies sending you mixed signals. I have a HUGE crush with this girl and she is just so hard to read. You and I are in the same boat my friend. I'm 17 and have had a crush on this girl for 1 1/2 to 2 years, and what is worse is she and this guy who is our class president is moving in and I'm afraid that if I don't do something like tell her how it truly feel about her she will fall in love with this guy. If I had to i would tell her that you have feeling for her. If you kiss her she might get poed. Just make sure that she really likes you before you make the kissing move. Link to post Share on other sites
toebigboy Posted December 16, 2005 Share Posted December 16, 2005 OK, I have this problem. There is this girl who I met because she is my sister's best friend. This girl is perfect for me. We have so much in common like musical tastes, we both do theatre, and we have a great time together. She is living with my family and me through the summer because school is out. She is not your typical girl, she game from an emotionally unstable background and she was almost always had a boyfriend since she was 15. This does not bother me. She and I have become good friends, but she is giving me mixed signals. We will be hanging out by my pool soaking up some sun and she is laughing at what I have to say. She has told me that I give the best massages she has ever received, professional or amateur. Other times she will dismiss the conversation I try to start with a one or two word answer. This usually results in a few moments of silence which is surprisingly comfortable. We have the best times drinking together and it is so much fun, but I do not drink to often. She also keeps telling me that she wants to do the single thing. She rarely tries to make conversation other than to smoke a cigarette. She is an amazing person to be around and every time I see her, even on my worst day, she makes it worlds better. I am terrified to tell her how I fell because I feel she will just want to be friends, and or not want to me friends anymore… I have takes a few classes on interpersonal communication and I am still at a loss. I don’t know whether or not to tell her, or kiss her. I may not have another chance to kiss her if it turns out she just wants to be friends. Oh, and there is a slight other twist she really likes this guy who is over 2000 miles a way and will be for years because of the Marines. It seems she talks to him more over the phone than she likes talking with me. The sad thing is that he has told her to not wait for him and to live her own life. Please someone help me figure out what is the best coarse of action and if there is any chance I might be able to one day be more than friends. Thank you much hi mate what i would do is go out and find some one else that likes you and get it on with themand see how the girl looks at you then i no its not fair on the other one but you will tell by her body language if she likes you or not she might just need a boost to it thats all ether that or have a beer one night with her and do some flirting and try for a kiss and see what the response you get???? Link to post Share on other sites
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