Crazy Jealousy

[Dorkette]

So I decide to stop trying to build something in a 5 month LDR I was in for many reasons.

 

We remained friends. We'd still chat and text here and there.

 

Today we were playing a true or false game via text, I would ask a T or F question, he would reply with his answer of T or F and a new question. We were at it for a while and then he asked me a question he really couldn't handle the truth of.

 

Something to the effect of: "Do you still have feelings for __________"

 

I answered "True" and my new question, well 3 replies later he goes BALISTIC, I mean as much as threatening to kill this guy I still have feelings for.

 

Naturally I gave the info to my relative that has connections with the Police and also notified some friends just in case.

 

He kept on sending me really nasty messages...

 

"Go to hell"

 

"Fk you"

 

"Crazy fkg bitch"

 

"If anything happens to him it will be on your concsious you crazy fkg b!tch"

 

Even though I know some people just say some things out of anger, jealousy and being hurt, he is clearly unstable to me so of course I fear for the other guy. I'm not sure if I should contact him with this drama or not. We still talk about business once in a while and are pretty civil, however, he really hates drama and not only that, if I am going to tell him I would have to show him all of the texts for facts and that includes the one of me still having feelings for him after so many years. I really don't want him to think I am disrupting his life or trying to bring drama in it but I feel he should know and since I have to go by his shop this week it would be the perfect opportunity. But not sure.

 

A lot of bad can come out of me showing him my texts but I don't want to put his life on the line.

 

Has anyone experienced anything this crazy?

If someone makes comments like these is anything really possible?

And what would be the best way to handle the old guy?

 

Thank you.

[Dorkette]

Anyone?

[Bronzepen]

Originally posted by Dorkette

So I decide to stop trying to build something in a 5 month LDR I was in for many reasons.

 

We remained friends. We'd still chat and text here and there.

 

Today we were playing a true or false game via text, I would ask a T or F question, he would reply with his answer of T or F and a new question. We were at it for a while and then he asked me a question he really couldn't handle the truth of.

 

Something to the effect of: "Do you still have feelings for __________"

 

I answered "True" and my new question, well 3 replies later he goes BALISTIC, I mean as much as threatening to kill this guy I still have feelings for.

 

Naturally I gave the info to my relative that has connections with the Police and also notified some friends just in case.

 

He kept on sending me really nasty messages...

 

"Go to hell"

 

"Fk you"

 

"Crazy fkg bitch"

 

"If anything happens to him it will be on your concsious you crazy fkg b!tch"

 

Even though I know some people just say some things out of anger, jealousy and being hurt, he is clearly unstable to me so of course I fear for the other guy. I'm not sure if I should contact him with this drama or not. We still talk about business once in a while and are pretty civil, however, he really hates drama and not only that, if I am going to tell him I would have to show him all of the texts for facts and that includes the one of me still having feelings for him after so many years. I really don't want him to think I am disrupting his life or trying to bring drama in it but I feel he should know and since I have to go by his shop this week it would be the perfect opportunity. But not sure.

 

A lot of bad can come out of me showing him my texts but I don't want to put his life on the line.

 

Has anyone experienced anything this crazy?

If someone makes comments like these is anything really possible?

And what would be the best way to handle the old guy?

 

Thank you.

 

 

Even though you remained friends with this LDR, it seems like he didn't get the point.

 

For some guys, if you are still talking to him and/or texting then your still interested in him. Or so he thought.

 

The T or F game was the straw that broke the camels back.

 

He probably was harboring bitterness and resentment towards you since you broke off the LDR.

 

He probably didn't accept your reason for breaking up so he made up his own. Meaning he probably thought you wanted to go back to your ex.

 

When you said you still had feelings for your ex, in his mind you confirmed his "suspicions". He lost it.

 

 

Unless you think there is a good chance of this person carrying out their threats to you or your ex, I wouldn't bother telling your ex anything.

 

Change your number and block his emails and IM's.

[Dorkette]

Yeah Bronzepen you are completely right.

 

So why do I feel bad now?

 

This is crazy. I thought I could be honest with him, I didnt want to lie about it and look what happens everything gets out of control.

 

I didn't mention the other guy (btw the other guy is not an ex he is someone that I really didn't have anything serious with but for some reason never totally got over) when we had the remaining friends convo because I didn't want to hurt him. I did truly want to remain friends.

 

And I have all this to worry about, it's crazy, it's crazy for this other guy to be involved with this when he is not at fault for my feelings. It's crazy for it getting to this level.

 

I feel like I should be doing something more and I have no idea what it is.

 

I thought about sending ex-LDR guy an apology email for hurting his feelings because it wasn't intentional but I don't even know if that's a good idea because his last text to me was "leave me the fk alone".

 

I'm so lost with this.

[Bronzepen]

Originally posted by Dorkette

Yeah Bronzepen you are completely right.

 

So why do I feel bad now?

 

This is crazy. I thought I could be honest with him, I didnt want to lie about it and look what happens everything gets out of control.

 

I didn't mention the other guy (btw the other guy is not an ex he is someone that I really didn't have anything serious with but for some reason never totally got over) when we had the remaining friends convo because I didn't want to hurt him. I did truly want to remain friends.

 

And I have all this to worry about, it's crazy, it's crazy for this other guy to be involved with this when he is not at fault for my feelings. It's crazy for it getting to this level.

 

I feel like I should be doing something more and I have no idea what it is.

 

I thought about sending ex-LDR guy an apology email for hurting his feelings because it wasn't intentional but I don't even know if that's a good idea because his last text to me was "leave me the fk alone".

 

I'm so lost with this.

 

 

You feel bad because, like you said, you didn't mean to hurt him.

 

You might have wanted to remain friends but now you know that he didn't.

 

There is nothing for you to fix because you have done nothing wrong.

 

Your probably not comfortable with people hating you and this is what your feeling now.

 

Don't apologiize or make any form of contact with your ex-LDR.

 

He is the one who has issues that only he can deal with.

 

Do block his emails and phone number.

 

Don't dwell on this, this is actually a blessing in disguise because now you know what kind of person he really is.

[Dorkette]

Don't worry I blocked and all that as soon as it happened. He hasn't text me again but if he does I will go ahead and change my number also.

 

"Your probably not comfortable with people hating you and this is what your feeling now."

 

No I'm not comfortable with people threatning people I care about and being disrespectful/verbally abusive to me. I have never put up with that and never will.

 

"Don't apologiize or make any form of contact with your ex-LDR."

 

The more I think about it the more I agree with you here. My thinking was to apologize for hurting him because it was not intentional and calm him down so he could see straight. But I've given up on that.

 

"Don't dwell on this, this is actually a blessing in disguise because now you know what kind of person he really is."

 

Nah not dwelling just making sure I do the right thing for everyone involved, but I see how one can easily dwell on something like this.

 

I thought about the blessing immediately because I had asked God to show me if I was heading in the right path, he showed me some stuff that made me want to end the LDR (aside for my feelings for this other guy). So yes I know the blessing.

 

Thank you very much I appreciate your time and comments.