anotheryear Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 Hello! I would like to know if it is just me, or do anyone feel that there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone? My Boyfriend/Children father of 18 years, says" I Love you" Nevertheless, I think that he do Love me but I question if he is in love with me. He said that there is no difference between the two....... What do you think?? Thank You! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
maacus Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 I think saying "I love you" means you are in love with someone if you are in a romantic relationship with that person. I told my STBX when we were dating "I love you" and to me (and her apparently) it meant that I was in love with her. If you say "I love you" to a blood family member it means something different in that you are not "in love" with your brother or sister. Or at least I HOPE not! Rarely, in any romantic relationship that I've had in my life, have I told a woman "I'm in love with you." By rarely, I mean not much more than once or twice, and that was usually at the beginning if at all. After that, "I love you," at least to me, meant the same thing. Well, I've probably thoroughly confused the situation now, which means my deed is done! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Breem Posted March 3, 2016 Share Posted March 3, 2016 I guess there's this fine line between "i love you" and "i'm in love with you". I love you is somehow like, I care for you and I cherish you and I'm thankful for you all rolled in one. But "I'm in love with you", it's more of an investment in them. You love them for who and what they are, you love not just the idea of them or being with them but truly with them. If that actually makes sense. LOL I can't really put it into words. I guess that's how it is with love. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
jenkins95 Posted March 4, 2016 Share Posted March 4, 2016 (edited) To me, being in love is like the crazy kind of love that you get at the beginning of a relationship, where you can't get enough of each other and can see no wrong in your partner. It is also called limerence and doesn't usually last for more than 3 years....... Often much less. Loving someone is a longer term, more stable kind of emotion. It may not be so intense as being in love, but it can be a stronger more permanent, more grounded bond that can last a lifetime and is based on real, normal life and leans less on high emotion and fantasy. It's quite normal for being in love to eventually lead to normal love. Just my understanding. Good luck everyone. Edited March 4, 2016 by jenkins95 3 Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted March 4, 2016 Share Posted March 4, 2016 For me.... As someone else who has been in a long term relationship (14 years)... I find the difference between loving someone, and being IN love with them - a level of passion. I have ALWAYS loved my guy, but I will confess, we have had some difficult times where I don't know if I would say I was IN love with him. I have always cared for him, I have always felt his pain, or happiness as if it were my own. He has always been a very significant part of my life. But there have been times when I didn't feel that passion, that spark, that swoon when he kissed me. When I didn't feel a burning desire for him. Times when things got too routine. Times when appreciation both ways had fallen short. So far at least... when the drift from "in love" to just "love" has come around, something has sparked us to bring us back closer together, and I again feel "in love" and once again feel those same wonderful feelings that I had when we met so many years ago. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Breem Posted March 9, 2016 Share Posted March 9, 2016 I'm going through divorce but reading the replies on this thread just makes me feel so giddy and happy. Maybe I just remember all the kinds of love I went through in life and the happiness I'd experienced with all of them. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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