general question [about finances]

[skinut2234]

Wife and I decided to finally separate- new and scary territory... in addition to the breakdown emotionally in the marriage, we now have significant debt. Found out she opened credit cards and ran up some pretty good amounts owed (yes partially my fault for not checking)-

In any event- here is my question if anyone has gone through this.

We are going to separate - I am looking for a small apartment. With a mortgage I have already and this debt - it will be hard to afford a place- In a separation- is she responsible for any of it? Basically I am stuck unless I get a second job to pay off- What have others done in this situation? Just looking for options other than living in my car.....

[Mr. Lucky]

Until you have an agreement in place, you're each responsible for all of it.

 

Have you seen a lawyer?

 

Mr. Lucky

[PegNosePete]

This kind of general question is impossible to answer without knowing the full financial details. Debts are taken into consideration along with all other financial details of the marriage. It also very much depends on where you live (country / state).

 

Best to see a lawyer to get advice, take all the relevant details with you.

[DivorcedDad123]

In my state, as long as your name isn't on the debt, you are in no way liable,UNLESS she can prove that the debt was incurred as something tangible to the well being of the family and something that YOU have used during the marriage.(Like a couch,stove,fridge,etc.,,)

If you are a "co" card holder or signer, you'd be on the hook for at least half of the debt regardless. You need to check into that, in your state. Either way,I'd try to print out copies of statements for those debts if they show where and how they were used.

 

 

Also,do NOT move out and get an apartment. Why pay a mortgage and rent when you don't have to? If it comes down to divorce proceedings,and she proves you've been paying the mortgage while living somewhere else, you could be made to continue paying while the divorce is on going. It's a major screw-up too many men make. Imagine paying that,your rent,and trying to fund a lawyer if it comes down to it.

[PegNosePete]

In my state, as long as your name isn't on the debt, you are in no way liable

I think that is common to all states and other countries, too. No court can force anyone to take out debt that is not already in their name.

 

What they can do, however, is to take the debt into account when allocating other resources. For example if the couple has 100k joint savings but the husband has 50k debt in his sole name, and the court decides the marriage is very long and the finances should be split 50/50. The court would give the husband 75k (50k to pay off the debt and 25k for himself) and the wife gets the other 25k.

 

It's the same for foreign property. A court has no jurisdiction to force a husband to give his wife half of his villa in Spain, but what it can do is to say look, you've got a villa in Spain, so it's fair for the wife to have the family home since they are equal value. Or if they're unequal value, to offset the value of the Spanish villa against the husband's share of the family house.

 

So yeah, it's all well and good to say you're not liable for the debt, but it's not necessarily that simple. You may end up being partially responsible by the back door. In divorce you cannot look at one debt or asset in isolation, you need to look at it in context of the big picture. Best to see a lawyer to advise.