Married man dumped me no reason given?

[Cappycorny]

Are you friends? Do you talk about personal stuff.... get together outside the bedroom ocassionally?

 

If so, then you're FWB (friends with benefits).

 

If not, but you still cuddle after sex, then you're FB (***k buddies).

 

I am still learning this lingo too...so don't feel back if you don't.

 

I don't know the lingo either. Yes we talk about all sorts of stuff and he even holds my hand. He's fun to be with and is so in tune with every sexual desire I could have. I feel so free with my body around him. Free like it's ok that I'm not perfect. When he called today of course I just ran to it and he said I really have missed you.

[AMJ]

When he called today of course I just ran to it and he said I really have missed you.

 

Mmmmhmmmm... what he meant was, "i really missed your booty."

[losangelena]

I don't know the lingo either. Yes we talk about all sorts of stuff and he even holds my hand. He's fun to be with and is so in tune with every sexual desire I could have. I feel so free with my body around him. Free like it's ok that I'm not perfect. When he called today of course I just ran to it and he said I really have missed you.

 

Well, if you're gonna persist, just take everything he says with a 2-ton grain of salt. He missed you? Sure he did.

 

It sounds like you already have feelings for this guy.

[Cappycorny]

Except legally. And, by the way, that's what all married men say when they want some booty but won't leave their wives. I'm unhappy, yet that night he goes home and has sex with his wife too . . .

 

I should flat out ask him? See what his response is. Not that I'm ready for any of that and not looking for him to leave a spouse.

[losangelena]

I should flat out ask him? See what his response is. Not that I'm ready for any of that and not looking for him to leave a spouse.

 

But you're ok with him cheating on his wife to be with you? That part doesn't bother you at all?

[Cappycorny]

Well, if you're gonna persist, just take everything he says with a 2-ton grain of salt. He missed you? Sure he did.

 

It sounds like you already have feelings for this guy.

 

Grain of salt exactly. I did that today that's why I'm thinking I can handle this ok.

[Redhead14]

When doing booty call what to expect? -- In your case -- Heart Break.

[Zahara]

I don't know the lingo either. Yes we talk about all sorts of stuff and he even holds my hand. He's fun to be with and is so in tune with every sexual desire I could have. I feel so free with my body around him. Free like it's ok that I'm not perfect. When he called today of course I just ran to it and he said I really have missed you.

 

Seems like you already are invested. At the end of the day, no matter how unhappy he is, he goes back to his wife. If you're able to handle it, then do what works for you. You've already made up your mind. But know that you're going to expect more, the more time you spend with him, the sex you have with him -- you will get more and more emotionally invested in him.

 

Yes, he missed the sex.

[Cappycorny]

But you're ok with him cheating on his wife to be with you? That part doesn't bother you at all?

 

Sadly yes I'm ok with it.

[Cappycorny]

When doing booty call what to expect? -- In your case -- Heart Break.

 

How so? I don't love him.

[katiegrl]

Seriously? There's a need to distinguish between the two??

 

In my opinion, the difference between a FB and a FWB is that one of them has manners, and maybe feels guilty about the whole situation. It changes nothing in terms of the relationship.

 

Don't ask me ...I've never had either one and wouldn't.

 

But I suppose the "friends" part of "friends with benefits" (FWB) lends itself to it being an actual friendship as opposed to just a "wham bam thank you m'am" type of thing.

 

But you are right....neither one will lead to a committed relationship. Not typically anyway, although you never know.

 

There have been folks on this board in committed relationships who started out as FWBs.

[basil67]

Checked out of the marriage on about every level.

 

He's moved out of the house and started divorce proceedings?

[Rejected Rosebud]

You don't seem like you're being honest with yourself at all.

 

There is nothing to talk about regarding "booty calls."

 

Somebody's horny, it's usually a guy, it's usually late at night like after the bar closes. There's a person who is known to be DTF at any given time so he gives her a call or text, if it's a green light he'll stop by, hit it, and go home. There won't be phone calls or anything like that until / unless he gets horny and doesn't have another option that he likes better at the moment.

 

(I guess it could be a girl doing the "booty calling" but it seem that usually it's the girl providing the free booty, and the guy doing the calling)

 

It's not like there is any kind of relationship involved. Not friendship or anything like that.

[frus69]

Why are you excited about being a booty call? This really baffles me.

 

 

If you don't have feelings for him it will work out. I had a few booty call, were all just a few months thing. I had no feelings for them, it worked out alright. Having said that, I wasn't super excited about seeing them either.

[Cappycorny]

Why are you excited about being a booty call? This really baffles me.

 

 

If you don't have feelings for him it will work out. I had a few booty call, were all just a few months thing. I had no feelings for them, it worked out alright. Having said that, I wasn't super excited about seeing them either.

 

Like the sex and his company. My feelings are at a surface level not deep. If they can stay that way that's best. It excites me because it's sort of like, I desire to see you today lets meet. It's random and for the most part not planned out. That excites me. I've never done this before and never imagined I would. It's probably safe to say it's more of an FWB then booty call but what did or do I know about this. Not much.

[Cappycorny]

You don't seem like you're being honest with yourself at all.

 

There is nothing to talk about regarding "booty calls."

 

Somebody's horny, it's usually a guy, it's usually late at night like after the bar closes. There's a person who is known to be DTF at any given time so he gives her a call or text, if it's a green light he'll stop by, hit it, and go home. There won't be phone calls or anything like that until / unless he gets horny and doesn't have another option that he likes better at the moment.

 

(I guess it could be a girl doing the "booty calling" but it seem that usually it's the girl providing the free booty, and the guy doing the calling)

 

It's not like there is any kind of relationship involved. Not friendship or anything like that.

 

In this case little bit of friendship is there. We both do the booty calling not just him all the time.

[SSJROMANCE]

Are you going on they booty call because YOU want to or because HE wants too? Because your question of "why me?" seems to indicate you are only doing it because he decided.

 

Also there are guys that are truly unhappy with their marriage and then there are guys who will TELL you they are unhappy with their marriage because they want to cheat and get in your pants. I would suspect the latter. Don't have any expectations other than he wants to bang you and eventually dump you. In the end you may feel like a used piece of meat and regret the whole episode.

[losangelena]

Sadly yes I'm ok with it.

 

Then sadly, I'm not gonna have a ton of sympathy when this blows up in your face, sorry. You're not playing with fire right now, you're sticking your hand directly in the flame.

[Cappycorny]

Are you going on they booty call because YOU want to or because HE wants too? Because your question of "why me?" seems to indicate you are only doing it because he decided.

 

Also there are guys that are truly unhappy with their marriage and then there are guys who will TELL you they are unhappy with their marriage because they want to cheat and get in your pants. I would suspect the latter. Don't have any expectations other than he wants to bang you and eventually dump you. In the end you may feel like a used piece of meat and regret the whole episode.

 

It seems mutual with us both having the same expectations for sex. As for his marriage, he is truly unhappy. I think in his case he probably should get out but only he can do that. When he first asked for my number last summer, he said I've had my eye on you for such a long time now and out of fear I held back. However, since the social circle (he means an event where we saw each other)is coming to a end I could not let it go with not having contact. I really like you and always have. What did I make of that? I don't know? I guess it's really hard to know when someone is feeding you a line or when they truly are being sincere.

[Cappycorny]

Then sadly, I'm not gonna have a ton of sympathy when this blows up in your face, sorry. You're not playing with fire right now, you're sticking your hand directly in the flame.

 

That's fine I respect your opinion. Let's hope it does not come to that.

[elaine567]

Go spend some time on the OW/OM part of this forum.

[fenix]

What's the deal with booty call anyway?

 

Do you really need us to explain you this? I think it is pretty simple tbh...

[Cappycorny]

Go spend some time on the OW/OM part of this forum.

 

No thanks. Hoping it just stays casual like it has been. Really not wanting anymore.

[SSJROMANCE]

It seems mutual with us both having the same expectations for sex. As for his marriage, he is truly unhappy. I think in his case he probably should get out but only he can do that. When he first asked for my number last summer, he said I've had my eye on you for such a long time now and out of fear I held back. However, since the social circle (he means an event where we saw each other)is coming to a end I could not let it go with not having contact. I really like you and always have. What did I make of that? I don't know? I guess it's really hard to know when someone is feeding you a line or when they truly are being sincere.

 

"I guess it's really hard to know when someone is feeding you a line or when they truly are being sincere.". Sometimes but in YOUR case he is STILL with his wife. That is a red flag my dear. And you have NO IDEA if he is seeing other women as well. One of my good friends was a player and he was good, very good. Kept the women away from each other with all his little excuses. Be careful.

[ExpatInItaly]

This guy is one smooth operator. I hope you're not naive enough to think you're his first and only side piece.

 

You should have zero expectations. It's sex. A couple laughs. Then he goes home to his wife. You're second fiddle and he's playing you in a major way.