Author JDam Posted March 11, 2016 Author Share Posted March 11, 2016 You are entitled to feel exactly how You feel. Stop judging. The break up happened like it did. Next Time,ask your partner to just meet up face to face. It happened the way it did. It sucks. Big Time. Why don't You exprèss all that in writing? It's an amazing soul searching and relief experiencing exercise. Write him a letter - just don't send it. It sounds like you resent him for many things. So accept, embrace your feelings and express them. Everything. Write everything down, it's soooooo liberating! Don't deny your feelings because You Will continue to feel angry and guilty, on top of it. Guilt makes everything worse. Avoid feeling guilty. Repressed feelings take forever to process. Get out of That loop. Work in where You are. Hoping you'd not feel angry & upset won't lead you anywhere. Be honest with yourself. Be very very honest with yourself. Thank you! Yeah, I will give it a try. It gives me some sort of relief to write it down here and vent. This is what this amazing forum is about afterall. And I guess I shouldnt take comments about my supposedly "confrontational, easily flustered personality" too much to heart. You cant just please everyone... Then it makes you wonder "So Im the bad guy here again..." and messes your head up once again. Link to post Share on other sites
Alamo657 Posted March 11, 2016 Share Posted March 11, 2016 I think his behavior is ridiculous to say the least. Going to MY profile and taking the time to delete a comment under my photos.. Is just sick. Because we have no mutual friends so he is only doing this to intentionally hurt me because the comment is not harming him either. He is just super angry that I wasnt willing to be friends on his own terms after he accused me of wanting to reconcile because I agreed to a meet up HE proposed. Im repeating that he is the dumper and was super cruel to me during the break up. You don't have to "go to someone else profile" (+ that would be tedious to check the entire history to find your own traces) to delete traces of your own activity, you only need to check your history in your own profile and delete from there. This goes for identification on pictures as well. As for his reaction, FB is a public profile, and you do not necessarily want other people to see who you've dated, and want to leave traces of your past relationships private. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JDam Posted March 11, 2016 Author Share Posted March 11, 2016 You don't have to "go to someone else profile" (+ that would be tedious to check the entire history to find your own traces) to delete traces of your own activity, you only need to check your history in your own profile and delete from there. This goes for identification on pictures as well. As for his reaction, FB is a public profile, and you do not necessarily want other people to see who you've dated, and want to leave traces of your past relationships private. This was 3 years old so that would take him ages to delete it from history of his profile. He obviously did that by going to my profile because he didnt delete the other comments since he cant even see them, the other photos are set to friends only mode. Doesnt matter, just wanted to clarify... Link to post Share on other sites
candie13 Posted March 11, 2016 Share Posted March 11, 2016 Thank you! Yeah, I will give it a try. It gives me some sort of relief to write it down here and vent. This is what this amazing forum is about afterall. And I guess I shouldnt take comments about my supposedly "confrontational, easily flustered personality" too much to heart. You cant just please everyone... Then it makes you wonder "So Im the bad guy here again..." and messes your head up once again. No one here knows You or your ex & no one knows how your RS really was. Anyone passing judgements risks to be off. You don't need to add to your own feelings of blame and low self worth. Take what You like & leave the rest. Really. Most People have troubles with unprocessed feelings. NC is great but The real real issue is how to deal with the sea of négative feelings following The break up. Because sharing them & expressing them is The healthy way out. Not to The ex, though. Yet You need to let them out. Thst's the real tricky bit. As for People calling you names... A bunch of strangers on internet. You know best. Cheers Link to post Share on other sites
Author JDam Posted March 11, 2016 Author Share Posted March 11, 2016 No one here knows You or your ex & no one knows how your RS really was. Anyone passing judgements risks to be off. You don't need to add to your own feelings of blame and low self worth. Take what You like & leave the rest. Really. Most People have troubles with unprocessed feelings. NC is great but The real real issue is how to deal with the sea of négative feelings following The break up. Because sharing them & expressing them is The healthy way out. Not to The ex, though. Yet You need to let them out. Thst's the real tricky bit. As for People calling you names... A bunch of strangers on internet. You know best. Cheers You are really sweet, thanks so much!! Link to post Share on other sites
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