Fresh start tomorrow [UPDATE]

[SixxChick]

This was very eloquent. Thank you for posting it. This is exactly how I feel about my ex too. I almost feel as though I could have written it. Best wishes to you for healing your shattered heart.

[sorano]

Thank you. I think the hardest part is accepting that it is over. You always feel like there is a little hope. This happens because there is no closure. I have learned a lot from this experience.

 

some events still replay in my mind. Like, how could she say such lovely things, promise me things, yet, leave me in a heart beat. I still can't figure that out but there is no need to or else it will drive people deeper into depression.

 

I do not have time to waste on negative situations, people, and thoughts. It has to end.

[sorano]

Hello jessica. Remember me? Your prince ( so you said ). I woke up today and finally realized that we were not compatible. You never did love me or even fell in love with me. You took advantage of me, my kindness, my love, everything. I really did go above and beyond for you. I showed you that there are still amazing people in this world. But, I was too nice for you. You were traumatized so bad in your past, have so much going on, that you did not know how to handle kindness and love when it was coming your way. I was basically last on your list. I felt I was on the bottom. I, however, made you my priority. I did that because I wanted to start a family and fell in love with you and would fight for you. I never felt that.

 

Remember when I came to visit you at your job? After dinner? I was supposed to go to the gym and I said, I WANT to see you tonight and will workout later. You texted me a smile and a heart.

 

Do you remember the italian lady that worked with you? she wanted to meet me? we met, and immediately after I left, she told you, SO WHEN IS THE WEDDING???

 

Do you remember all your friends saying, so when is he going to buy you a ring???? calling you my wifey? THEY KNEW I WAS A GOOD MAN.

 

Do you remember when your other co worker said, wow, YOU DROVE FROM POINT A TO POINT B JUST TO SEE HER FOR 10 MINUTES? Do you remember what you said?????????????? No? let me refresh your memory you pig.

 

"Well guys, I am worth it" ( followed by your fake smile )

 

Guess what. I hate to break it to you. YOU WERE AND ARE STILL NOT WORTH IT.

 

I have learned a lot. One mistake I made, was putting too much trust in you. A REAM WOMAN, would stick it out even through the tough times and not run away. I also learned, never cry for a person who does not know the value of your tears. I am done with that. If your giving your all to someone and its not enough, you are giving it to the wrong person. That is what I did. That is why I never felt the love back. YOU were the WRONG PERSON.

 

Oh and one more thing. Do not mess with my feelings, just because you are unsure of yours. The only thing you were right about and I am shocked. when we broke up, you said I will be ok and I will be fine. I AM OK AND I AM DOING FINE NOW!

[SixxChick]

I also learned, never cry for a person who does not know the value of your tears. I am done with that. If your giving your all to someone and its not enough, you are giving it to the wrong person. That is what I did. That is why I never felt the love back. YOU were the WRONG PERSON.

 

I'm sorry.

 

I so feel your pain.

 

Hang tough.

[bummer]

Wow. Sounds like she was an awful waste of time and a possible scourge on humanity.

 

I hope I get all the way to this stage of pissed off soon. Selfish girls are the worst.

[sorano]

Hey everyone. So how is everyone coping with this 3 day weekend? We all know that when we get dumped, the weekends are hell. Just really really bad. When there is a holiday involved, it feels even worse.

 

I must say, 5 months have past, and I don't feel really sad anymore, especially this weekend. I know many of us are wondering what are ex's are doing right now. who they are with, are they at the beach having fun this holiday, etc etc. I too, have been thinking about this today. It still does suck but, its not so bad.

 

My ex loved the beach. Today, if we were still together, we would have gone to the beach, watch the air show and fireworks. spend the whole day. But, I am looking forward to spending a day at the beach with another person. someone who appreciates me for me, loves me, and cares for me. To the next step.

[Rachel39]

Nearly 5 months in and the weekends and especially bank holidays are the worst for me like you said!

 

I'm still upset by it all and although I took myself on an 8k walk yesterday today I feel quiet low.

 

I'm not depressed anymore but have days were I do feel like this but when it falls on a weekend It's hard for me.

 

Somedays i go to bed early just so the day is over because I can't stand it some days.

 

It shouldn't be that way! On thoses days I just feel down irritated and I don't want to talk to anyone.

 

This is the complete opposite for my personality!

[Penguin_hugs]

I'm also 5 months in and I'm definitely starting to feel better. I'm looking forward to being able to spend time with someone else on a bank holiday weekend and just enjoy myself. Unfortunately I'm stuck studying inside for an exam in a month and moving out of the area in 2 months- so I feel like that is holding me back in being able to move on.

 

There was a big festival in my town this weekend and it seems like everyone I know was either there or at the beach and I just felt so jealous and miserable! Can't wait til I am free to start living life again.

 

Struggling with coping on my own now though during revision. Before my relationship I used to rely on my Mum and spend time with her when I was having a breakdown with studying. I get horrendous IBS and diffuse alopecia when stressed with studying. Then when I was in a relationship I used to rely on my ex and those symptoms massively decreased. Now I'm on my own trying to cope, my Mum has other priorities and her own relationship now and I'm having to both work and study and I don't have many friends where I live now.

 

This weekend has made me realise that it's hard coping with stress on my own, but that I don't really care what he is doing anymore.

[sorano]

Nearly 5 months in and the weekends and especially bank holidays are the worst for me like you said!

 

I'm still upset by it all and although I took myself on an 8k walk yesterday today I feel quiet low.

 

I'm not depressed anymore but have days were I do feel like this but when it falls on a weekend It's hard for me.

 

Somedays i go to bed early just so the day is over because I can't stand it some days.

 

It shouldn't be that way! On thoses days I just feel down irritated and I don't want to talk to anyone.

 

This is the complete opposite for my personality!

 

I understand. It's going to be ok. Day by day you will start to heal more and more. There is no time frame. I too, still get upset and want to knock some sense in my ex and tell her, why? How can you treat human beings like this?

 

The pain sucks I know. 4th of July is coming. Hopefully we will be ok

[VeveCakes]

Not me, mine is rotting in jail where he belongs. Hope he enjoyed his long weekend in the concrete palace.

[sorano]

I'm also 5 months in and I'm definitely starting to feel better. I'm looking forward to being able to spend time with someone else on a bank holiday weekend and just enjoy myself. Unfortunately I'm stuck studying inside for an exam in a month and moving out of the area in 2 months- so I feel like that is holding me back in being able to move on.

 

There was a big festival in my town this weekend and it seems like everyone I know was either there or at the beach and I just felt so jealous and miserable! Can't wait til I am free to start living life again.

 

Struggling with coping on my own now though during revision. Before my relationship I used to rely on my Mum and spend time with her when I was having a breakdown with studying. I get horrendous IBS and diffuse alopecia when stressed with studying. Then when I was in a relationship I used to rely on my ex and those symptoms massively decreased. Now I'm on my own trying to cope, my Mum has other priorities and her own relationship now and I'm having to both work and study and I don't have many friends where I live now.

 

This weekend has made me realise that it's hard coping with stress on my own, but that I don't really care what he is doing anymore.

 

Hopefully everything will work out. Good news is you aren't thinking of your ex and you are starting to heal. Also, nothing lasts forever. This will all pass and you will be in a positive state once again. Feel better

[sorano]

Ah yes, those little set backs. Just when your feeling back to normal you get slapped in the face again.

 

Had a dream last night that I went to the supermarket. Waiting on line I saw my ex gf and in my dream she was talking to someone else. I felt rage. I woke up suddenly. The whole day I was thinking about that dream and a mix of emotions just started flooding my brain. Anger, sadness, depressed and just down. It's amazing how a dream can make one feel like this and make you take a few steps back.

[Satu]

Hope you're feeling better now.

 

That dream was your subconscious processing the hurt you went through.

 

Horrible as it was, it's a sign of significant healing.

 

Sometimes when the pain is being worked on it feels as bad as when it happened. The narrative of the dream is a symbolic vehicle that the subconscious uses for its healing process. The subconscious is very intelligent and creative, so you're in good hands.

 

Trust yourself.

 

Trust the wisdom of your own mind and heart.

 

 

Take care.

[sorano]

Thank you satu. That was very powerful. I am still not feeling well. The whole day has just been bad. I realize she was not for me. I came to terms with that. But this dream just made me feel really bad and miss her. It's mind blowing. You know it's not the right one yet your mind is playing tricks on you.