CrystalMinds Posted March 8, 2016 Share Posted March 8, 2016 Hello all. A few weeks ago I posted about me being jealous of some girls at the gym me and my boyfriend go to. He also knows two girls there quite well, let's call them A and B. Now I recently met one of them, A, she's fun and meeting her helped getting over my jealousy for some reason. But she has a friend, B, who I haven't met yet and who still gets me jealous for some reason. She was the one my boyfriend said "I saw B. again today... mmmmm xD" (he showed me a text and wasn't aware this text was showing probably). Now she's a pretty girl, I couldn't help but look her up on Facebook. I kind of wanna ask my boyfriend if he ever had (or has) a crush on her... Now, they all know eachother for a few years and I know, if he wanted to be with one of them, he would already be with one of them instead of me. But, it could be that he wanted to be with her, but the feelings weren't mutual or she had a boyfriend at the time and now that boyfriend is gone and now he could have his chance... We're together for just over a year now by the way. Sorry if this doesn't make a lot of sense and if this comes off as really jealous. I'm quite embarrassed of those feelings and the feelings coming with it. Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted March 8, 2016 Share Posted March 8, 2016 You need to get your jealousy and insecurity in check hun otherwise you're going to drive yourself mental. If your boyfriend hasn't given you any reason to question his commitment or affection for you then WHY would you dare ask a question you KNOW you don't want to hear the answer to??? What good will it do? Because no matter his answer it will never be good enough. You will over analyze everything and probably look for problems where there aren't any. If you can't get a hold of your insecurities then perhaps you shouldn't be dating this guy until you do. Sorry but it's the truth. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted March 8, 2016 Share Posted March 8, 2016 The truth of the matter is....boys will be boys. This romantic theory that once a man is in a great relationship he will not favor another and you is all they think about. That is BS. Men are horndogs, and they will lusts after, think about, fantasize about other women, check out body parts, share their opinions about women to their buddies, coworkers, yadda yadda yadda. It's a reality. Your BF will lust after women in his head, and you can't control that. It is what it is. I agree with Michelle's post....if you can't get a hold of your insecurities, then you are not ready to date and have a proper relationship with someone. Link to post Share on other sites
sandylee1 Posted March 8, 2016 Share Posted March 8, 2016 I wouldn't ask if I were you. You need to curb your jealously otherwise your boyfriend will get fed up of it and dump you. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted March 8, 2016 Share Posted March 8, 2016 I don't see how asking him that question will serve you any constructive purpose. If he says no, would you believe him? If he says yes, then what? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 8, 2016 Share Posted March 8, 2016 If you ask this Q, your BF will either lie to you which is not good or he will tell you the truth & you will be upset if he says he did have a crush on them or you won't believe him if he says he did not. He's screwed no matter what he does. Your only smart move is not to ask. You already have the best logical answer: if he wanted to be with them it would have already happened & he would never have asked you out or continued to date you. Be satisfied with that answer. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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