WhatAmIDoin Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 The last time I wrote was back in Jan of this year. This girl that I was dating dissapeared and decided to have her new boyfriend text me and tell me to leave her alone. But, she was texting me and I was texting her.... it got so confusing that I left for a 2 month trip to Germany. So I got back and she was leaving messages on my cell while I was gone so i thought she was interested. But then i found out that she was telling me one story and her new boyfriend another. So i called him and we met up and we confronted her. She lied right to my face for him and chose him over me! Still... I went back for more. He went away for a week, she stayed with me and then when he got back dissapeared, oh it get's better... not once not twice... but three times since Jan. So apparently he had to leave for a long trip, who knows when he will get back, so I gave it one more shot and she moved back in with me for the last 2-3 months. She was doing some wierd stuff, dissapearing for a few days not telling me where she was, but in fact I was wrong for asking! "Was I her Dad", she asked me. So last week she moved back in and stayed 5 days. Everything was cool, everything was fine.... so I thought. She dissapeared for 3 days, not a phone call, text message, nothing at all. So She textx me and says, "Can you put time on my phone?" So i told her if she told me where she was, sure. No answer. I saw a family friend today and I guess she has been talking mad crap about me behind my back. So I texted her and the last thing she said to me was, "You never wanted me anyway". Does anyone know how agravating it is to hear that when you've been on an emotional rollercoaster for the last year? I waited so long for this chance, and she never really gave one to me. She sat here at this computer for 2-3 months and the only time she talked to me was to get her something to drink, make me something to eat... So ya, I got mad and my attitude towards her started to change. I'm not a butler. She once asked me to get her two friggin ice cubes! Not one or three, but two! I'm agravated as all hell and yet when we parted our ways today, i can't help but feel depressed and sad as hell, when I should be happy. What is wrong with me? Link to post Share on other sites
chaos70 Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 You = yoyo. She's got the string, starting master all the nifty tricks you can do with yoyos. (metaphor). You - her = less chaos = more happiness. Her + instability + immaturity + lack of self-respect = bad, bad things. I have an abacus, but I think you got the gist. She says one thing, does the other, and you empower her by reaffirming that her behavior is acceptable. Gain the power back, buddy. You + other fish in the sea > you + her. Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Originally posted by chaos70 You = yoyo. She's got the string, starting master all the nifty tricks you can do with yoyos. (metaphor). You - her = less chaos = more happiness. Her + instability + immaturity + lack of self-respect = bad, bad things. You + other fish in the sea > you + her. I believe we are present at the birth of a whole new branch of mathematics... Seriously though, I can't fault Chaos's logic. A local minimum would be to take charge in this relationship by an iterative procedure in which your wussing around her tends to zero. The set of solutions involving a better fish seems more elegant though. Link to post Share on other sites
Author WhatAmIDoin Posted June 14, 2005 Author Share Posted June 14, 2005 How can you not cave in to the ones you love and want to be there for? Or wussing..... lol? Link to post Share on other sites
Author WhatAmIDoin Posted June 14, 2005 Author Share Posted June 14, 2005 When in this world did playing with ones emotions become an accepted practice in a smart social society to the point where we call it a game? If you want her, pretend like you don't... if she wants you to call her, then ignore her for a few days.... So basically we are all walking around totally ignoring what we feel we should be doing? Seriously... if your drunk it makes sence, but being sober it doesn't. Why do we have to do the opposite of what we want to be attractive to others? Does that make sence to anyone? Make your-self less available to become more available? Why do we deny what we feel to get what we want? Link to post Share on other sites
Sal Paradise Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 WhatAmIDoing rarely have I seen someone with a more perfect user name to describe their personality. No offense but a lot of this your is fault. I'm in no way excusing her behavior in any way. shape. or form but she has done nothing but lie and manipulate you from the beginning and you kept giving her chance after chance. I know you can't be that hard up for sex or a girlfriend. She treated you like complete crap so you couldn't of loved her that much. The sex couldn't of been so great you'd put up with that amount of bs......So why go back to be used and abused? Did you feel you would be the guy to change her and you just had to show her love and stability and she would change? Was it sadomasochism? I'm not trying to sound harsh but why would you give someone who didn't love you at all and treated you like **** that many chances? I guess if you knew the answer you wouldn't have that name lol. Hang in there and try to find a girl that loves you, hell just try to find one that is mentally stable and worry about finding love later lol..... Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Originally posted by WhatAmIDoin If you want her, pretend like you don't... if she wants you to call her, then ignore her for a few days.... None of us have said this. We're recommending that you get out of this bad relationship. Originally posted by Sal Paradise No offense but a lot of this your is fault. I'm in no way excusing her behavior in any way. shape. or form but she has done nothing but lie and manipulate you from the beginning and you kept giving her chance after chance. Hang in there and try to find a girl that loves you, hell just try to find one that is mentally stable and worry about finding love later lol..... Word. Link to post Share on other sites
Author WhatAmIDoin Posted June 14, 2005 Author Share Posted June 14, 2005 I know nobody said that in this post, but I was taking a look at other posts on this web page and that was the most given advice to people with relationship problems. Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Originally posted by WhatAmIDoin I know nobody said that in this post, but I was taking a look at other posts on this web page and that was the most given advice to people with relationship problems. Ah, ok, yes that's true. Gameplaying definitely doesn't work for me either. But sometimes we have to rethink our love strategy. The line between the 2 is not always easy to draw. Link to post Share on other sites
millefiori Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Originally posted by WhatAmIDoin The last time I wrote was back in Jan of this year. This girl that I was dating dissapeared and decided to have her new boyfriend text me and tell me to leave her alone. But, she was texting me and I was texting her.... it got so confusing that I left for a 2 month trip to Germany. So I got back and she was leaving messages on my cell while I was gone so i thought she was interested. But then i found out that she was telling me one story and her new boyfriend another. So i called him and we met up and we confronted her. She lied right to my face for himand chose him over me! [color=#FF0000]Still... I went back for more.[/color] He went away for a week, she stayed with me and then when he got back dissapeared, oh it get's better... not once not twice... but three times since Jan. So apparently he had to leave for a long trip, who knows when he will get back, so I gave it one more shot and she moved back in with me for the last 2-3 months. She was doing some wierd stuff, dissapearing for a few days not telling me where she was, but in fact I was wrong for asking! "Was I her Dad", she asked me. So last week she moved back in and stayed 5 days. Everything was cool, everything was fine.... so I thought. She dissapeared for 3 days, not a phone call, text message, nothing at all. So She textx me and says, "Can you put time on my phone?" So i told her if she told me where she was, sure. No answer. I saw a family friend today and I guess she has been talking mad crap about me behind my back. So I texted her and the last thing she said to me was, "You never wanted me anyway". Does anyone know how agravating it is to hear that when you've been on an emotional rollercoaster for the last year? I waited so long for this chance, and she never really gave one to me. She sat here at this computer for 2-3 months and the only time she talked to me was to get her something to drink, make me something to eat... So ya, I got mad and my attitude towards her started to change. I'm not a butler. She once asked me to get her two friggin ice cubes! Not one or three, but two! I'm agravated as all hell and yet when we parted our ways today, i can't help but feel depressed and sad as hell, when I should be happy. And you seriously think she's in love with you? You know this sentence: "Still... I went back for more." is pitiful. Are you a doormat or a masochist??? Seems like you enjoy the treatment she gives you. What is wrong with me? You've become a doormat, that's your problem. You're seeing positive signs while she's trying to get rid of you. Sorry, for the blunt words, but that's something someone should tell you before you continue deluding yourself. I'm not a fan of games either, but the fact that she's disappearing tells me that she's either not interested in you (very likely) or that she's trying to protect her space that you are perpetually invading. Link to post Share on other sites
greyskies Posted June 15, 2005 Share Posted June 15, 2005 That is exactly what he is a door-mat. I am a friend of both parties so when he would come to my place and bend my ear I would give him what I thought was sound advice. He never took heed to what I said ever and I went through every one of those with him AS HIS FRIEND and nothing more. He does love the treatment from her trust me he also inflicts pain upon himself in anger and frustration, (or ATTENTION) only he truly knows that and believe he knows. I truly cared about him as a friend and I mean that, he use to hurt me all the time he claims I talk sh** on him and he says people told him I did. That is not true and if they did say I did its also a lie. I had his back every-time, I put off other friends so we can be alone so he could talk it out. He was very ungrateful and had no regard for what I thought was a real friendship at one time. He should know his gf would be talking **** when he runs to me every-time they fight. So why believe all that **** when I showed him I was his friend. He is just plain mistyfied. And he knows it. I would tell her mess from him and I really wanted to see them make it and all they did was use me as a pawn him to get her piss and her to get him piss and I think that sucks. When either one of them knows I would give them the shirt off my back. It is all a freaking sick game these two play and I shut the door to him and his lies and now hes piss. I wish him all the best in life and Im prolly the only one who feels that way. And thats his fault. Link to post Share on other sites
TMonkey Posted June 15, 2005 Share Posted June 15, 2005 Greyskies, you write crazy. wish I could make sense of it. WhatamIdoin, I know it hurts, she sounds awful. take some comfort in the fact that she seems like a total crazy abusive horror show. Love can be sweet little easter-egg hunt in a minefield and you just got both legs blown off. Learn and run, run like hell, buddy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author WhatAmIDoin Posted June 15, 2005 Author Share Posted June 15, 2005 Just to show you how it is. She called last night like everything was normal. I just started a job this week and she asked me to take Friday off to go to her sons graduation. Then she said that she was going to come over because she made brownies and wanted to give me one.. normal brownies not the ones with the funky stuff.... no call, no show, and now she dissapeared again. She called me, not visa versa. WTF? Link to post Share on other sites
New_Wife Posted June 15, 2005 Share Posted June 15, 2005 Hey What Am I Doin, Can I borrow some money? Just a couple thou until the checks in the mail get here? I've sold a lot of AZ oceanfront condos lately, and I expect to see the $ any time. Oh, and while we're at it, could you rotate the tires on my car? Walk my dog? And take out my trash? Shoot, can I practice my knife throwing act with you? Dude, stop. Really. Full stop. You are tatto-ing a great big "WELCOME" on your forehead, from your spot in front of the door there, then scratching it in wonderment that she steps on ya. My dog is smarter than that! He'll only get smacked once before he moves out of the way. Plainly speaking - she doesn't want you as a boyfriend. She likes you as her B*tch. Sorry. If you want a girlfriend, look elsewhere. If not, can I borrow that money? 3K oughta do me. Link to post Share on other sites
greyskies Posted June 16, 2005 Share Posted June 16, 2005 I've been telling you the same thing for months now. I cant believe you, he just wont listen to reason. I hated seeing him go through this all the time I felt bad for him cause you know sometime people just cant lead a horse to water no matter how thirsty they are. I would have said "I'm sorry I dont think that would be very wise to go to his graduation, its so confusing for the poor kid already why continue prolonging it?, and the brownies ah I'll pass but thanks anyway." OR EVEN BETTER DONT ANSWER THE PHONE!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author WhatAmIDoin Posted June 16, 2005 Author Share Posted June 16, 2005 I got a text message on her phone tonight... well my phone. And I called the number. There was a pissed of girl on the other end yelling at me, (I just called and didn't talk) and it turns out that she was calling this dude and his girl friend found out. So now I know where she was dissapearing to this whole time. Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 16, 2005 Share Posted June 16, 2005 Originally posted by New_Wife You are tatto-ing a great big "WELCOME" on your forehead, from your spot in front of the door there, then scratching it in wonderment that she steps on ya. Hot tip: don't practise your knife-throwing on him while he's changing your tyres - that kind of puncture is difficult to fix. Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 16, 2005 Share Posted June 16, 2005 Originally posted by WhatAmIDoin it turns out that she was calling this dude and his girl friend found out. It just gets better and bet. This girl is class Link to post Share on other sites
SoleMate Posted June 16, 2005 Share Posted June 16, 2005 ....Love can be sweet little easter-egg hunt in a minefield and you just got both legs blown off. Learn and run, run like hell, buddy..... Confused male + Easter basket - 2 * leg == Inability to walk, let alone run Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 16, 2005 Share Posted June 16, 2005 Originally posted by SoleMate Confused male + Easter basket - 2 * leg == Inability to walk, let alone run Hey, the romantic maths continues. With a couple of axioms and a few theorems, we could have a whole new science here. Link to post Share on other sites
Author WhatAmIDoin Posted June 17, 2005 Author Share Posted June 17, 2005 Well I am taking your guys advise, and I appreciate your help. Shr texted me today and wanted to meet me at lunch time and I said no. Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 17, 2005 Share Posted June 17, 2005 Originally posted by WhatAmIDoin Shr texted me today and wanted to meet me at lunch time and I said no. Well done. A great first step! Link to post Share on other sites
greyskies Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 She was at your house last night and then when you went to work your mom had your little brother make her leave. Thats freaking sad. :lmao: :lmao: Link to post Share on other sites
YouKnowIt Posted June 20, 2005 Share Posted June 20, 2005 Greyskies, I totally can relate to your honesty and believe every word you are saying (especially about the part where his mom made his brother come kick the girl out of the house, that is classic and totally something his mom would do) for I know this guy too, and he has been in many situations like this where he makes up stories and gets mad at his girlfriend, creates all this uncalled for anger. You should really tell your girl friend (seeming that you guys are mutual friends) to leave this guy alone, he is not good for her and she has a son to think about. He needs to get his act together and by her coming around and screwing with his mind, it does not help. Good luck... OTTA HERE. Link to post Share on other sites
TMonkey Posted June 20, 2005 Share Posted June 20, 2005 You all know each other? This is getting really surreal. Link to post Share on other sites
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