Older virgin

[Goitalone]

Im not exactly sure but I think I have schizoid persanality disorder which explains why I haven't been in a relationship at all. I don't feel like explaining it so if your interested look it up.

[BronzeAgeJaeger217]

Interesting to hear, quite a trend on this site

[elaine567]

Im not exactly sure but I think I have schizoid persanality disorder which explains why I haven't been in a relationship at all. I don't feel like explaining it so if your interested look it up.

 

Do you tell them that on a first date too?

I am not being facetious here.

[Goitalone]

Do you tell them that on a first date too?

I am not being facetious here.

 

Well im not sure if I have it or not but I did an online test and it came back 100 percent

[truth_seeker]

Im a man of few words so I am a thirty five year old virgin which im not ashamed of. When I bring this up there isn't a second date which im not angry about because I get it that alot of women don't want to deal with a virgin at this age. I've decided that I won't waste anymore time on trying to get women to accept my virginity as there is nothing wrong with it. So where are the older virgin women?

 

Fascinating topic!

 

Ever think of going to a hooker to get it out of your system?

Why announce it?

Why not just play it off that you haven't had sex in a while because you got burned by your long time girlfriend? BS that you like to be intimate only in a relationship.

[elaine567]

Well im not sure if I have it or not but I did an online test and it came back 100 percent

But you don't tell your dates about it or do you?

[ZA Dater]

Maybe instead of looking for a specific person, look for the one who you really like irrespective of her experience level.

 

Its a shallow world but you have my respect for being forthright with your dates, the fact they judge you so harshly is quite sad.

[Goitalone]

But you don't tell your dates about it or do you?

 

This was a couple of days ago I seen a movie with a guy in it who reminded me alot of myself so I did some research and I haven't been on a date in nine months. Do you know what schizoid personality is?

[BronzeAgeJaeger217]

The OP should keep it hidden from women

[TheJorma]

The OP should keep it hidden from women

He can't.

 

Well, that's not entirely true. He can keep it hidden until they get to the bedroom. Then she will find out.

[BronzeAgeJaeger217]

He can't.

 

Well, that's not entirely true. He can keep it hidden until they get to the bedroom. Then she will find out.

 

Ya oh well, and people say there is someone for everyone, even if a person has been single as long as the OP

[LookAtThisPOst]

Finding a 35 year old virgin woman who isn't looking for someone uber religious isn't an easy task

 

This is rather deja vu, reminds me of that "searching1999" guy who was dead set on finding a female, unkissed virgin.

 

I mean, it's one thing being one, but being one AND expecting the same in a future partner, is unrealistic. We told the previous poster this and he wouldn't budge.

[Goitalone]

This is rather deja vu, reminds me of that "searching1999" guy who was dead set on finding a female, unkissed virgin.

 

I mean, it's one thing being one, but being one AND expecting the same in a future partner, is unrealistic. We told the previous poster this and he wouldn't budge.

You make it seem like a more experienced women wouldn't judge me for this which isn't true, that's why I was looking for an older virgin. I give up there isn't a virgin women my age and I have schizoid personality disorder so I don't see the point anymore.

[elaine567]

This was a couple of days ago I seen a movie with a guy in it who reminded me alot of myself so I did some research and I haven't been on a date in nine months. Do you know what schizoid personality is?

 

YOU can't possibly diagnose yourself from a movie, and self diagnosis via the internet is fraught with problems too.

You may be right, you may be wrong, but you need to check in with a professional, before you merely write yourself off all together.

[Goitalone]

YOU can't possibly diagnose yourself from a movie, and self diagnosis via the internet is fraught with problems too.

You may be right, you may be wrong, but you need to check in with a professional, before you merely write yourself off all together.

 

Whether I have the disorder or not there aren't any virgin women my age, I learned my lesson on trying to swim upstream. The only thing I need or have to do is stay black and die and nobody cares not even me. In order for there to be winners there must also be losers.

Edited March 19, 2016 by Goitalone

[scorpiogirl]

Whether I have the disorder or not there aren't any virgin women my age, I learned my lesson on trying to swim upstream. The only thing I need or have to do is stay black and die and nobody cares not even me.

 

Well, I just don't know why you're not having luck. Just look at your amazing attitude here.

I wouldn't get involved with this person, virgin or not.

 

I'd prefer a man who has sexual experience, but if he has other qualities that make him a good potential partner, I can't say I'd say no. But you've diagnosed yourself with a serious disorder, resigned yourself to your situation, and are waiting to die.

 

Nothing is going to fall into your lap. Right now you're an incredibly unattractive prospect. Who wants this dark cloud over them. Chances are you're going to make women responsible for you happiness. That's not fair.

Fix yourself before you look for a partner.

[ZA Dater]

Well, I just don't know why you're not having luck. Just look at your amazing attitude here.

I wouldn't get involved with this person, virgin or not.

 

I'd prefer a man who has sexual experience, but if he has other qualities that make him a good potential partner, I can't say I'd say no. But you've diagnosed yourself with a serious disorder, resigned yourself to your situation, and are waiting to die.

 

Nothing is going to fall into your lap. Right now you're an incredibly unattractive prospect. Who wants this dark cloud over them. Chances are you're going to make women responsible for you happiness. That's not fair.

Fix yourself before you look for a partner.

 

What is unfair is to judge the OP in the manner you have done above. What makes you think he has not been trying? How you can judge him conclusively based on what he has typed is quite amazing to me. Believe me if you were in his position you would feel the same. In the absence of any positive prospects I see nothing wrong with resigning oneself BUT if you do that you need to realise you have NO chance at all with anyone so in that sense I do agree with you.

 

 

OP needs to really decide what he wants, going out and trying to get it can come at a cost emotionally. He needs to decide if the price of pre judged constant rejection is worth it.

 

 

For what its worth I am a 31yo virgin and expecting to find a female in the same situation is unrealistic in the extreme. I feel the OP needs to focus on what he is good at, enjoy that whatever it may be. Forget the fact his is a virgin and get on with life.

 

 

If it really bothers him so much and he can live with the morality, he can pay and loose it very quickly.

 

 

I relate to his sense of disappointment but also I know unless I can find someone with limited experience I am not interest in them at all, sadly by the time one hits 31-35 unless one is hugely wealthy of hot, most younger females aren't interested at all.

Edited March 19, 2016 by ZA Dater

[scorpiogirl]

What is unfair is to judge the OP in the manner you have done above. What makes you think he has not been trying? How you can judge him conclusively based on what he has typed is quite amazing to me. Believe me if you were in his position you would feel the same. In the absence of any positive prospects I see nothing wrong with resigning oneself BUT if you do that you need to realise you have NO chance at all with anyone so in that sense I do agree with you.

 

 

OP needs to really decide what he wants, going out and trying to get it can come at a cost emotionally. He needs to decide if the price of pre judged constant rejection is worth it.

 

 

For what its worth I am a 31yo virgin and expecting to find a female in the same situation is unrealistic in the extreme. I feel the OP needs to focus on what he is good at, enjoy that whatever it may be. Forget the fact his is a virgin and get on with life.

 

 

If it really bothers him so much and he can live with the morality, he can pay and loose it very quickly.

 

 

I relate to his sense of disappointment but also I know unless I can find someone with limited experience I am not interest in them at all, sadly by the time one hits 31-35 unless one is hugely wealthy of hot, most younger females aren't interested at all.

 

This is not about you, but how did I know you'd be here with your optimistic outlook on life?

I'm not judging him. I'm going by what he's written in his own words.

 

You two feel free to encourage each other in your pity party though. You just want someone to agree with your constant moaning about how unfair life is. It's boring. Find a new tune, please.

 

I'm out of this thread. Have at it.

[ZA Dater]

This is not about you, but how did I know you'd be here with your optimistic outlook on life?

I'm not judging him. I'm going by what he's written in his own words.

 

You two feel free to encourage each other in your pity party though. You just want someone to agree with your constant moaning about how unfair life is. It's boring. Find a new tune, please.

 

I'm out of this thread. Have at it.

 

No pity party, the OP needs to spend less time focussing on the fact he has no experience and rather focus on trying to find someone he likes and is attracted to irrespective of experience.

 

 

The OP should be optimistic about actually finding someone if he wants to find someone but realistically he wont find another virgin so looking for that isn't really viable in my opinion.

 

 

I don't think the OP would find it difficult to find someone if he had a comprehensive idea of what exactly he wanted. If you don't know what you are looking for you aren't ever going to find it.

[Goitalone]

Well, I just don't know why you're not having luck. Just look at your amazing attitude here.

I wouldn't get involved with this person, virgin or not.

 

I'd prefer a man who has sexual experience, but if he has other qualities that make him a good potential partner, I can't say I'd say no. But you've diagnosed yourself with a serious disorder, resigned yourself to your situation, and are waiting to die.

 

Nothing is going to fall into your lap. Right now you're an incredibly unattractive prospect. Who wants this dark cloud over them. Chances are you're going to make women responsible for you happiness. That's not fair.

Fix yourself before you look for a partner.

 

Phil Collins- I Don't Care Anymore.

[Tread Carefully]

My niece is 30 and a virgin. She's saving herself for marriage and there is nothing wrong with that. She's got 2 masters degrees, a great job and a sweet nest egg. She's also quite pretty, gets lots of dates but struggles to find a guy who is willing to wait. I understand her side of it as well as the guys. There are pluses & minuses on both sides.

 

She is proof though of there being older virgins out there.

[Empire87]

Im a man of few words so I am a thirty five year old virgin which im not ashamed of. When I bring this up there isn't a second date which im not angry about because I get it that alot of women don't want to deal with a virgin at this age. I've decided that I won't waste anymore time on trying to get women to accept my virginity as there is nothing wrong with it. So where are the older virgin women?

 

None of the women you go out with would ever know you're a virgin unless you told them. I don't know why you would offer up that information when you're getting to know someone anyways but that is your decision. If you had slept with 100 women... Would you tell the girls you go out with that information as well? Of course not. The only one making your lack of experience a deal breaker is you.

[ZA Dater]

The only one making your lack of experience a deal breaker is you.

 

That is not true at all. There are a few examples of ladies on this forum who are not interested in guys who lack experience. I can understand the OP want to be upfront, I have done the same in the past and been met with similar rejection as a result.

 

 

Can you honestly think of anything worse than getting to the bedroom and she realises you have no clue.

[Empire87]

That is not true at all. There are a few examples of ladies on this forum who are not interested in guys who lack experience. I can understand the OP want to be upfront, I have done the same in the past and been met with similar rejection as a result.

 

 

Can you honestly think of anything worse than getting to the bedroom and she realises you have no clue.

 

That's the thing though. You are telling yourself that these women are able to see through your mind and be certain that you have never had sex before or have no/little experience. Just because there are women here who would rather not be with a guy who is a virgin, doesn't mean that's the end all be all of every woman in the world. If you ask those same women if they found out that their BF or husband was a virgin when they met, if that would change how they felt about them now... I guarantee you they'd tell you otherwise.

 

Anytime you sleep with someone new, the overwhelming majority of the time, it's going to be a bit awkward and not the most memorable experience for either of you. That just goes with the territory of being naked and having sex with a person you've never done it with before. After you get past your early 20's, girls aren't thinking that way anyways.

 

You seem to carry with you the mindset that girls behave and look at sex the same way as they would in high school, for their entire lives. That's not the case.

 

You ask if there's anything worse than a girl realizing you have no clue in the bedroom?

Why aren't you thinking "well I have 0 experience and I got this girl into the bedroom and am fooling around with her, so she's clearly into me, that's a great feeling/awareness in itself" ?

 

If you get her into an intimate situation then you should know that The girl is the one feeling insecure and self conscious at that point. If not then now you do.

Look through the threads here where a guys inability to perform is brought up. More times than not, the girl is the one who is asking "is there something wrong with me? Or something I'm not doing right?". So that should tell you that even if you have no clue what you're doing, the girl is going to want to facilitate and make herself feel like she was sexy enough and skilled enough to get you off.

 

Now obviously if it keeps happening over and over then it's different. But you aren't dealing with that at all it seems. Advertising what you're self conscious about has 0 purpose. Unless you're hiring an escort, there is no reason to divulge how many sexual partners you e been with. Or haven't been with, during early stages of dating or a relationship.

 

I dated a girl for 3 years after college and she flat out said that she never wanted to know what my "number" was and who id slept with before her. Now even though I had been with other girls, I could very well have been a Virgin and she wouldn't have known either way because it's nothing we discussed and nothing that had any place in whether or not we were happy and intimate with one another.

[ZA Dater]

That's the thing though. You are telling yourself that these women are able to see through your mind and be certain that you have never had sex before or have no/little experience. Just because there are women here who would rather not be with a guy who is a virgin, doesn't mean that's the end all be all of every woman in the world. If you ask those same women if they found out that their BF or husband was a virgin when they met, if that would change how they felt about them now... I guarantee you they'd tell you otherwise.

 

Anytime you sleep with someone new, the overwhelming majority of the time, it's going to be a bit awkward and not the most memorable experience for either of you. That just goes with the territory of being naked and having sex with a person you've never done it with before. After you get past your early 20's, girls aren't thinking that way anyways.

 

You seem to carry with you the mindset that girls behave and look at sex the same way as they would in high school, for their entire lives. That's not the case.

 

You ask if there's anything worse than a girl realizing you have no clue in the bedroom?

Why aren't you thinking "well I have 0 experience and I got this girl into the bedroom and am fooling around with her, so she's clearly into me, that's a great feeling/awareness in itself" ?

 

If you get her into an intimate situation then you should know that The girl is the one feeling insecure and self conscious at that point. If not then now you do.

Look through the threads here where a guys inability to perform is brought up. More times than not, the girl is the one who is asking "is there something wrong with me? Or something I'm not doing right?". So that should tell you that even if you have no clue what you're doing, the girl is going to want to facilitate and make herself feel like she was sexy enough and skilled enough to get you off.

 

Now obviously if it keeps happening over and over then it's different. But you aren't dealing with that at all it seems. Advertising what you're self conscious about has 0 purpose. Unless you're hiring an escort, there is no reason to divulge how many sexual partners you e been with. Or haven't been with, during early stages of dating or a relationship.

 

I dated a girl for 3 years after college and she flat out said that she never wanted to know what my "number" was and who id slept with before her. Now even though I had been with other girls, I could very well have been a Virgin and she wouldn't have known either way because it's nothing we discussed and nothing that had any place in whether or not we were happy and intimate with one another.

 

The problem is this.

 

 

Society does not expect a 35yo guy to be a virgin. What you say has merit but frankly if you are a virgin past 30 then clearly you are incapable of getting a lady into an intimate situation to begin with.