Northwestern1011 Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 I know the friendzone usually occurs in reverse--woman meets man, he's nice, but not what she wants in a partner, she expresses this to him, and he enters the friendzone willingly. OR, he never is uprfront stating that he wants to be more than friends to begin with, and lingers there. But what about the opposite--woman meets man, but SHE ends up in the friendzone. Has a woman ever successfully escaped the friendzone? I'm struggling with this at the moment, and I need someone to remind me it DOESNT happen. 1
NinjaX Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 Friends with benefits, perhaps. Long term girlfriend, highly unlikely. 4
Shining One Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 I've slept with a few of my female friends over the years, but none ever made it to the relationship phase. 2
thecrucible Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 Well, personally I don't maintain friendships with men I feel a strong attraction for. My male friends are either guys who I have no feelings towards but I enjoy them as a friends, or other male friends (more on acquaintance level) that I don't have feelings for in that moment in time but would be perfectly willing to give dating a try as we have certain qualities in common. I've dated the latter male friend type before and they have not a felt enough spark or are not attracted to me or it doesn't work out for whatever. So I definitely think women can be friendzoned too.
jen1447 Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 I know the friendzone usually occurs in reverse--woman meets man, he's nice, but not what she wants in a partner, she expresses this to him, and he enters the friendzone willingly. OR, he never is uprfront stating that he wants to be more than friends to begin with, and lingers there. But what about the opposite--woman meets man, but SHE ends up in the friendzone. Has a woman ever successfully escaped the friendzone? I'm struggling with this at the moment, and I need someone to remind me it DOESNT happen. Usually not, but circumstances vary. Are you (I assume we're talking about you) actually in the friendzone, etc.? How did you get there? Etc.
Author Northwestern1011 Posted March 16, 2016 Author Posted March 16, 2016 Usually not, but circumstances vary. Are you (I assume we're talking about you) actually in the friendzone, etc.? How did you get there? Etc. I am definitely in the friendzone. How I got there, I don't know. I don't know how I got there but it happened very early on. He's very much in the whole young/wild/free stage men go through in their 20s. He's also not dating anyone (and hasn't been. To quote him most recently "no. women are lame".) Our history contains one very heated make out, and a year later one time of sexting which he started (he was sober). That's also, according to him, the first/only time he's ever sexted. The physical chemistry good, as is the attraction, I'm his "type", and I don't think he friendzoned me because we're too different (we have a lot of the same interests and hobbies, which makes the joking as well as the deep conversations easy). Unfortunately I enjoy talking to him more than any of the men I've ever dated. So yes. I'm in the friendzone, don't know why, need a cold smack of reality that it will not ever change.
losangelena Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 I personally have never gotten out of the friendzone. 1
xpaperxcutx Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 Stop being his friend. Stop hanging out with him. Disappear from his life. Maybe distance will allow him to miss you. Attraction can be maximized if you CHANGE.
Mrin Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 Fishnets, CFM pumps and a dye job. Kidding! The only way I know of a woman getting out if the friendzone is for him to see her in a whole new light. Like completely different. So ya, maybe I wasn't totally kidding. The key is to make a substantial change that causes a paradigm shift. 2
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 No. This is a much worse situation than a male friendzone. Men can't feel a spark over time, if treated well, if there is a connection. For a man attraction is much more instictive. The best you will do is casual hook up when he is lonely or horny. I have been there in my 20s and the worst thing is watching them meet a girl they really like. Then you are going to see how he really acts when he is into someone. And you will be asked for advice and get to hear him gush 4
road Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 Fishnets, CFM pumps and a dye job. Kidding! The only way I know of a woman getting out if the friendzone is for him to see her in a whole new light. Like completely different. So ya, maybe I wasn't totally kidding. The key is to make a substantial change that causes a paradigm shift. For women in the friend zone: Women confuse a man willing to interact with a woman as being a friend when in reality they are just being friendly. When a man is single and he finds the woman attractive he is not going to want a girl friend he is going to want her as a girlfriend. As Mrin say's, something had to happen to make this man realize that she is really attractive. As the way it is done in the movies. They make the actress look plain. They the make over. Rats nest hair, to hair that the light shines off of even in the night, hair a man can't keep his hands off of. A figure devoid of curves, all of a sudden has all the right curves appear in all the right places. Permanent frown to permanent smile you. For it is just not looks but attitude. Maybe you need to showcase "you" better. 1
jen1447 Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 I am definitely in the friendzone. How I got there, I don't know. I don't know how I got there but it happened very early on. He's very much in the whole young/wild/free stage men go through in their 20s. He's also not dating anyone (and hasn't been. To quote him most recently "no. women are lame".) Our history contains one very heated make out, and a year later one time of sexting which he started (he was sober). That's also, according to him, the first/only time he's ever sexted. The physical chemistry good, as is the attraction, I'm his "type", and I don't think he friendzoned me because we're too different (we have a lot of the same interests and hobbies, which makes the joking as well as the deep conversations easy). Unfortunately I enjoy talking to him more than any of the men I've ever dated. So yes. I'm in the friendzone, don't know why, need a cold smack of reality that it will not ever change. Hmm, well I hate to be rough but I do have a smack for you - if he was sexually into you he would have jumped by now. Long before now really. That's probably really why you're in FZ, not the "women suck" story. Don't take it hard, it's just a matter of types and all that. But it ain't goin' nowhere. Go find one who'll give you more. 1
Redhead14 Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 I am definitely in the friendzone. How I got there, I don't know. I don't know how I got there but it happened very early on. He's very much in the whole young/wild/free stage men go through in their 20s. He's also not dating anyone (and hasn't been. To quote him most recently "no. women are lame".) Our history contains one very heated make out, and a year later one time of sexting which he started (he was sober). That's also, according to him, the first/only time he's ever sexted. The physical chemistry good, as is the attraction, I'm his "type", and I don't think he friendzoned me because we're too different (we have a lot of the same interests and hobbies, which makes the joking as well as the deep conversations easy). Unfortunately I enjoy talking to him more than any of the men I've ever dated. So yes. I'm in the friendzone, don't know why, need a cold smack of reality that it will not ever change. don't know why? -- Two statements from your post answer that . . . He's very much in the whole young/wild/free stage men go through in their 20s "no. women are lame" a year later one time of sexting which he started -- So, a year after you made out with him, he starts engaging with you again through sexting??? Smooth. I enjoy talking to him more than any of the men I've ever dated. -- Why would you say that when this comes out of his mouth -- women are lame. He sounds immature. I can't imagine any stimulating/engaging conversation happening with him. If I heard that from a guy, I'd be suddenly deaf and watching his lips move, for maybe about 2 seconds . . . 1
elaine567 Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 I enjoy talking to him more than any of the men I've ever dated. -- Why would you say that when this comes out of his mouth -- women are lame. Agreed. He definitely sounds immature and a bit tactless too. Getting involved with guys like this who do not actually like women, only what they can get out of them, is asking for trouble. OP, Did he actually realise when he said this that you are indeed a woman too, or do you have this "all women are useless" dialogue going on between the two of you, as you are just his buddy and not actually a woman... 2
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 Most of the time it is guys that get placed in the friend zone
mcjordan Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 Most of the time it is guys that get placed in the friend zone Ya..um...she covered that already A man who says "women are lame" TO a woman is not relationship material. 1
Author Northwestern1011 Posted March 16, 2016 Author Posted March 16, 2016 Agreed. He definitely sounds immature and a bit tactless too. Getting involved with guys like this who do not actually like women, only what they can get out of them, is asking for trouble. OP, Did he actually realise when he said this that you are indeed a woman too, or do you have this "all women are useless" dialogue going on between the two of you, as you are just his buddy and not actually a woman... He can be immature, for sure. But again, what male between about the ages of 24-27 isn't? The "women are lame" came during a "are you dating anyone?" "No, are you dating anyone?" conversation. Not that I'm like his guy pal now. And no, the sexting itself was out of the blue, but we'd kept in touch pretty regularly before that happened. It wasn't like he resurfaced one night just because he was horny, which made it more odd. Apparently he told someone once "she listens to me and she cares about me. She's the kind of girl you get serious with and marry. And I'm not ready to get serious with anyone." And I don't think it's a physical issue. Example, while we've hung out there's been comments like "you have long legs. It's really attractive." Compliments about my butt, etc. And lots of touching, etc. So I'm not sure really sure how I ended up here.
elaine567 Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 I'm not ready to get serious with anyone." That is how you ended up here.
elaine567 Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 Apparently he told someone once "she listens to me and she cares about me. She's the kind of girl you get serious with and marry. And I'm not ready to get serious with anyone." He respects you and I guess he cares about you but he recognises you are not the type of girl he can just fool around with, and fooling around type girls is what he is looking for just now, as he is not ready to settle down yet
preraph Posted March 17, 2016 Posted March 17, 2016 I mean, a lot of guys would have sex with you under those circumstances, but it wouldn't lead to anything. You'd be the one who suffered.
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