I'm in a funk, anyone know of anything to kick my butt into gear?

[Mr Scatterbrain]

Thanks for reading,

 

I'm 28 and I'm basically having a hard time Focussing lately.

I feel scatterbrained like I have all these loose ends and they

aren't being addressed and I don't know where to start to find

peace. There's all these things I want to conquer, but I end up just

putting them off and I get bored, so I just watch movies and buy

CDs I don't need. I don't go out much.

 

Basically I'm 28, have an OKAY paying job I don't really like. I didn't

go to college so I have no degree. I have a great gal I've lived with for the

past 4 years. Were engaged to be married sometime next year.

 

I feel very out of shape and sluggish and tired lately. I want to find a new job,

but don't know where to look. I want to find my calling. I want to make more money.

 

But most of all, I guess I just want to find out how I can find INNER PEACE so I can

combat my struggles with a clear mind. I've thought about Meditation or Yoga, and

also Exercise, to get me moving and make me feel better about myself, But i'm just

so tired lately and have ZERo Drive.

 

Anyone have any suggestions?

[ConfusedInOC]

Read my thread on F.A.I.T.H. based goal setting.

 

You may not have inner peace because you don't have a set of focused goals.

[moimeme]

First of all, see your doc to make sure nothing physical is going on and that you're not suffering from depression.

 

If you have the medical all clear, then I think the trick is to figure out what you want. That is, what you WANT! Or, conversely, what you don't want. But desire is generally a better motivation than is fear so your best bet is to sort out what you really want and then you'll want to find a way to get it. Is it a hot car? A great home? Travel? Your own windsurfing board? You can't even set a goal until you figure out what that goal might be - and that means you need to figure out what you really want.

[westernxer]

Ever taken a vacation?

[Mr Scatterbrain]

you're right.

 

I need to figure out what I really want and what's most important

to me right now.

 

when I say Scatterbrained i mainly mean I know I want to get back in shape,

and I know I want to find a new job and I know I want to get back in a class

or two to head towards my dream career of teaching music and I also want to

go visit my family back east (kinda broke right now) and I want to get a better

car (mine is dying on me, but I'm trying to save for a wedding too)

 

But I just feel like I can't do them all at the same time AND balance my relationship

with my girl too and focus on the wedding. I want to get married but sometimes I

wonder if maybe I'm feeling pressured to get all the things I wanted to have done,

done before I get married.

 

I don't have fear of commitment or fear of marriage at ALL. I just think i'm bumming

because I always thought i'd have money coming in and I'd be settled down in that

career i always dreamed about and I'd have things happening in my life and I'd have

money to go on a great honeymoon and not have to worry about anything.

 

I know life is NOT perfect. I just want to focus. I need to find a focus. I'll take

your advice and see a doc.

[ConfusedInOC]

Originally posted by Mr Scatterbrain

you're right.

 

I need to figure out what I really want and what's most important

to me right now.

 

when I say Scatterbrained i mainly mean I know I want to get back in shape,

and I know I want to find a new job and I know I want to get back in a class

or two to head towards my dream career of teaching music and I also want to

go visit my family back east (kinda broke right now) and I want to get a better

car (mine is dying on me, but I'm trying to save for a wedding too)

 

But I just feel like I can't do them all at the same time AND balance my relationship

with my girl too and focus on the wedding. I want to get married but sometimes I

wonder if maybe I'm feeling pressured to get all the things I wanted to have done,

done before I get married.

 

I don't have fear of commitment or fear of marriage at ALL. I just think i'm bumming

because I always thought i'd have money coming in and I'd be settled down in that

career i always dreamed about and I'd have things happening in my life and I'd have

money to go on a great honeymoon and not have to worry about anything.

 

I know life is NOT perfect. I just want to focus. I need to find a focus. I'll take

your advice and see a doc.

 

Having F.A.I.T.H. based goals will help you maintain your focus. If you aren't writing your goals down, and it seems you know what you want, then you have no way to achieve them.

 

Read my thread on F.A.I.T.H. based goal setting. Then sit down and write some goals out based on that method. Then pick them in order of importance and attainability. Remember your goals can NOT include someone else or things you have no control over.

 

Start with small goals first that help you reach you main goals.

 

Focus comes from knowing what you want and having a plan on achieving it. And the plan starts with the steps you take in achieving your goals.

 

Best of luck.

[westernxer]

Well, if you can't accomplish these things before you get married, you sure as hell won't afterward, especially when the kids arrive.

 

Might as well kiss your dreams goodbye.

[Mr Scatterbrain]

thanks OC

[ConfusedInOC]

Originally posted by Mr Scatterbrain

thanks OC

 

You're welcome.

 

Let me know how it turns out.

[Bla]

I feel the same way as the author of this thread. I have goals, but nothing seems important, even my goals. I just don't have motivation, I'm like a car without fuel. How do you get yourself moving, does it have to be so hard?

[ConfusedInOC]

Originally posted by Bla

I feel the same way as the author of this thread. I have goals, but nothing seems important, even my goals. I just don't have motivation, I'm like a car without fuel. How do you get yourself moving, does it have to be so hard?

 

How attainable are your goals.

 

You need short term and long term goals.

 

Did you read my thread on FAITH based goal setting?

[Naive]

Originally posted by westernxer

Well, if you can't accomplish these things before you get married, you sure as hell won't afterward, especially when the kids arrive.

 

Might as well kiss your dreams goodbye.

 

 

I agree. I think that if you want to really get somewhere where you will feel happy start before you have kids. Don't get me wrong, because you have kids it does not mean it's impossible but it wll get harder. Like moimeme said, get your head together and figure out what you want to do. Sometimes you need to force yourself to go out there and do what you want but once you are doing it you'll look back and think how could I have waited this long?

[XNemesisX]

I would definitely want to rule out depression if I were you....

 

What you are describing sounds like you are depressed. I used to be a high energy/extrovert/very sociable person but all of the sudden I became the exact opposite and so I knew something was up.

 

Also, the most important thing to remember about setting goals is making sure they are attainable and reasonable.

[Bla]

The problem is - I don't want anything, there are things I have to do, but nothing that I want. So how am I going to set goals if I don't care to achieve them?

[bicyclejunk]

ZERO? Nothing at All that you are interested in?

 

Or are you just feeling lazy to follow a small little

impulse or interest in something you've kinda, sorta

liked over the years?