dealing with insecurity/self-esteem issues

[demi89]

I am 24 years old and lately i have realized that i have huge insecurity and self esteem issues particularly when it comes to relationships.

 

Every time i start to get close to a guy, i find my over analyzing everything to the point where i feel sick with anxiety and consequently, these relationships always fail. If I've been hanging out with a guy or dating them and i dont hear from them for a day or two i start to freak out and think "did i say/do something wrong?" "am i not good enough?" If i go out on a date with a guy that i really like, again i find myself over analyzing the whole date afterwards, trying to pin point anything that i may have said or done that could have put him off.

 

It's the same when it comes to sleeping with a guy i'm seeing, i will over analyse the whole thing afterwards and worry that i was not good enough or he may not have enjoyed it.

 

I've had long term relationships in the past where i have been hurt quite bad, and i guess as a result i lost a lot of my self esteem and haven't been able to regain it.

 

Over the last year, I've been through a lot of guys, probably over a dozen, but it just never works out and i always end up blaming myself and think that i am not good enough. It has got to the point where now if i meet someone new, i convince myself it wont work out, i'll only drive them away.

 

Deep down i know i have no reason to feel like this, i know i am an attractive, successful, hardworking, easy going and caring person but i feel that i just drive people away with my insecurities and self esteem issues. I am scared that i will never find someone who can see past this, and see me for who i really am.

 

I know this behavior is extremely unhealthy and i'm just torturing myself but i don't know how to stop.

 

Does anyone else have similar issues or any advice on how to stop this?

[Natalie92]

I have realised that I have major insecurities, me and my partner at going through a tough time about it and I'm scared it will split us up.

 

I really want to change but scared that I can't. I hate the way I look, he tells me I'm beautiful and gorgeous but I don't see it. He is getting annoyed that fact that he keeps telling me these things but I take no notice.

 

He is my first and only boyfriend and we have been great for so long. I just feel that I am ruining it and I may lose him, as early as tonight I need to prove to him twit I can change. But how?