tamcat Posted March 23, 2016 Share Posted March 23, 2016 I don't really have anything to talk about, or seek advice about. I just wanted to tell someone that I lodged the divorce papers today. I took the first real step to walking away from 13 years of my life, coz it didn't make us happy. I've never felt more like a failure. Link to post Share on other sites
KBarletta Posted March 23, 2016 Share Posted March 23, 2016 I don't really have anything to talk about, or seek advice about. I just wanted to tell someone that I lodged the divorce papers today. I took the first real step to walking away from 13 years of my life, coz it didn't make us happy. I've never felt more like a failure. Congratulations on taking that next step. Even if it is something you didn't want (I sure didn't), it means you are a step closer to a new life that will be better than your old one. And try not to think of it as a "failure" - I know that is a common though to have because it did not work out as planned, but there are always a number of factors involved. You are only one part of the equation that includes you, your ex, and any outside influences that led to the split. It's never all one person's fault. I wish you luck with the next chapter of your life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
minimariah Posted March 23, 2016 Share Posted March 23, 2016 (edited) big HUGS! it does suck. it does & you'll feel down about it for some time... but remember, this will PASS & you will feel better! i remember your story & you were so kind and sweet and i'm glad you made this decision and following through. it's difficult in the beginning - it always is... it's always hard to make the first step but try to take it one day a time & look in the future. best of luck to you & your family; i hope you'll keep the good relationship with the X and continue to raise your little dude. Edited March 23, 2016 by minimariah 1 Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted March 23, 2016 Share Posted March 23, 2016 I don't really have anything to talk about, or seek advice about. I just wanted to tell someone that I lodged the divorce papers today. I took the first real step to walking away from 13 years of my life, coz it didn't make us happy. I've never felt more like a failure. Was there infidelity? Any kids? Link to post Share on other sites
Author tamcat Posted March 24, 2016 Author Share Posted March 24, 2016 Was there infidelity? Any kids? Yes. I was/am the ahole. Emotional affair after many years of not being happy. Not an excuse at all. Nearly 7 year old boy Link to post Share on other sites
Author tamcat Posted March 24, 2016 Author Share Posted March 24, 2016 big HUGS! it does suck. it does & you'll feel down about it for some time... but remember, this will PASS & you will feel better! i remember your story & you were so kind and sweet and i'm glad you made this decision and following through. it's difficult in the beginning - it always is... it's always hard to make the first step but try to take it one day a time & look in the future. best of luck to you & your family; i hope you'll keep the good relationship with the X and continue to raise your little dude. Thanks for your non-judgementalness (if that is a word), Mariah. I have always appreciated it from you Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted March 24, 2016 Share Posted March 24, 2016 Yes. I was/am the ahole. Emotional affair after many years of not being happy. Not an excuse at all. Nearly 7 year old boy So you see no way for your son to be the motivation to not just save your marriage but make it better than it ever was pre affair? Link to post Share on other sites
Author tamcat Posted March 27, 2016 Author Share Posted March 27, 2016 Road, I appreciate your input. But my wife and I have tried counselling. We both know that it is time to move on, and we have great respect and love for each other. I really don't need to be judged by others. I give myself a hard enough time as it is. There really is no long term advantages to staying together "for the sake of the children" Link to post Share on other sites
Orion39 Posted March 29, 2016 Share Posted March 29, 2016 Sorry to hear it didn't work out. It can be hard to walk away from any relationship, good luck in the future Link to post Share on other sites
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