What to do

[D]

I broke up with a girl friend of mine 2 months ago, mainly due to circumstances such as no place to be alone together, in privacy, and the whole relationship turned out into once-a-week dinner or movies. It was her who was complaining about this, so I let her go, and wished her to find a boyfriend who would attend to her needs more often than I could. For the past 2 months, she been sendng me e-mails, calls me and wants me back. Our relationship turned into hell for the last 2 or 3 months of it. I agree, the timing was not right, and we both live with our parents, and she has college, and on weekends she gets together with her study group to prepare for exams ( a waste of time, because she never gets done anything anyway ). He parents are controlling her and do not let her go on trips or little short vacations. I had to put up with all this, and yet, she was blaming me for not being able to drive 20 miles at least 3 or 4 times a week to pick her up, and then drive her back home. I work long hours, and she could not understand that it was very hard for me to see her everyday, unless she could stay over at my place, which was a huge problem on her parents's side. So everything needed to be done so that her parents wound not get aggravated, and could not "upset" them by staying with me at night. So, to make the story short, she wants me to get back together with her, but I am trying to make her realize that nothing has changed, and the circumstances are still the same, and we will still end up breaking up over this, until she moves out from her parents.

 

She claims that I do not want her, she does not understand that it is not about wanting, it is simply very hard to work out a relationship under these circumstances. But on the other hand, I really do not want to loose her completely. What can be done in this situation? I asked her to move in with me, I have a bog house, and my parents do no mind her staying over for a few months, until I get my own place, but she can't upset her parents, because every time she comes home after 10 PM, her dad'd heart gets sick, and mom takes pills, so it's very nasty, and I am sick of them to tell you the truth. Is not this crazy? Is there anything that can be done?

[h]

I broke up with a girl friend of mine 2 months ago, mainly due to circumstances such as no place to be alone together, in privacy, and the whole relationship turned out into once-a-week dinner or movies. It was her who was complaining about this, so I let her go, and wished her to find a boyfriend who would attend to her needs more often than I could. For the past 2 months, she been sendng me e-mails, calls me and wants me back. Our relationship turned into hell for the last 2 or 3 months of it. I agree, the timing was not right, and we both live with our parents, and she has college, and on weekends she gets together with her study group to prepare for exams ( a waste of time, because she never gets done anything anyway ). He parents are controlling her and do not let her go on trips or little short vacations. I had to put up with all this, and yet, she was blaming me for not being able to drive 20 miles at least 3 or 4 times a week to pick her up, and then drive her back home. I work long hours, and she could not understand that it was very hard for me to see her everyday, unless she could stay over at my place, which was a huge problem on her parents's side. So everything needed to be done so that her parents wound not get aggravated, and could not "upset" them by staying with me at night. So, to make the story short, she wants me to get back together with her, but I am trying to make her realize that nothing has changed, and the circumstances are still the same, and we will still end up breaking up over this, until she moves out from her parents. She claims that I do not want her, she does not understand that it is not about wanting, it is simply very hard to work out a relationship under these circumstances. But on the other hand, I really do not want to loose her completely. What can be done in this situation? I asked her to move in with me, I have a bog house, and my parents do no mind her staying over for a few months, until I get my own place, but she can't upset her parents, because every time she comes home after 10 PM, her dad'd heart gets sick, and mom takes pills, so it's very nasty, and I am sick of them to tell you the truth. Is not this crazy? Is there anything that can be done? if she doesn't want to move in with you, then i don't know what you're supposed to do - ? she's going to have to realize that she has to grow up and stop depending on other people to do all the work in relationships, and that she needs to have a life apart from her parents. if she wanted, she coudl get a job and have her own place/move in with you. her parents sound very controlling and manipulative - her father "gets sick" and mother "pops pills" if she comes in late? how old is she? they sound like really sick people - not a healthy environment for your girlfriend. i think that her parents would survive somehow if she got her own life - and eventually she'll have to - nobody wants to live with their parents forever. sorry to hear about your problem, but your girlfriend is expecting too much of you, and needs to be willing to stand up for herself and for you. good luck!

[ashesmum]

How old are you two? Over 18? Is she or family quite religious? Tell her she needs to start living her own life. Stop fretting over her parents. And the lame excuse of health problems, whose idea , hers or her parents? Sounds like she needs to still grow up a little. You need to figure out what it's going to accomplish trying keep her. Is it worth it? Do you really feel like doing all that stuff over again. Is she worth it? And here's another question, do you want to have a future relationship with someone whose parents get on your nerves all the time? Good luck.

I broke up with a girl friend of mine 2 months ago, mainly due to circumstances such as no place to be alone together, in privacy, and the whole relationship turned out into once-a-week dinner or movies. It was her who was complaining about this, so I let her go, and wished her to find a boyfriend who would attend to her needs more often than I could. For the past 2 months, she been sendng me e-mails, calls me and wants me back. Our relationship turned into hell for the last 2 or 3 months of it. I agree, the timing was not right, and we both live with our parents, and she has college, and on weekends she gets together with her study group to prepare for exams ( a waste of time, because she never gets done anything anyway ). He parents are controlling her and do not let her go on trips or little short vacations. I had to put up with all this, and yet, she was blaming me for not being able to drive 20 miles at least 3 or 4 times a week to pick her up, and then drive her back home. I work long hours, and she could not understand that it was very hard for me to see her everyday, unless she could stay over at my place, which was a huge problem on her parents's side. So everything needed to be done so that her parents wound not get aggravated, and could not "upset" them by staying with me at night. So, to make the story short, she wants me to get back together with her, but I am trying to make her realize that nothing has changed, and the circumstances are still the same, and we will still end up breaking up over this, until she moves out from her parents. She claims that I do not want her, she does not understand that it is not about wanting, it is simply very hard to work out a relationship under these circumstances. But on the other hand, I really do not want to loose her completely. What can be done in this situation? I asked her to move in with me, I have a bog house, and my parents do no mind her staying over for a few months, until I get my own place, but she can't upset her parents, because every time she comes home after 10 PM, her dad'd heart gets sick, and mom takes pills, so it's very nasty, and I am sick of them to tell you the truth. Is not this crazy? Is there anything that can be done?