How can i stop myself from being attracted towards her?

[Hunter17]

*Sorry for my bad english*

 

There is this girl whom I know from last 2 years. My female bestie introduced me to her. She is very sweet, not too talkative, shy. She is a typical teenager girl who loves to read and watch romantic books and movies, having stupid celebrity crushes. Moreover I feel she is not mature. we fight a lot.

 

Totally opposite of what I expect from a girl. I like girls who are smart, intelligent, bold and having some good sense of humor. Moreover the girl should be practical and mature. But for some reason I find her amusing and interesting. I find her honest though she is stupid and doesn't think twice before she speaks. But I feel she speaks from heart, she means her words. I can't explain it..but she has totally different way of viewing the world.

 

I used to flirt with her just for fun. I didn't have any feelings then. ( this is about year ago ) and one day she evidently told me that she likes me. I rejected her. Reason: I didn't feel anything for her. Plus I am not interested in getting into relationships. Love and relationships are not my thing. I told her diplomatically that i feel she deserves better than me. As there are many boys better than me and perfect for her.

 

After this incident an year passed. Everything was going normal. Now we are good friends and got close and know more about each other. One boy in our college has started showing interest in her. Now she is close to him.

 

It hurts everytime i see her hanging with him. I feel so confused. I realized her importance now. I always wanted that she finds suitable man for herself who keeps her happy forever. She is so sweet, honest and pure..I feel like an ass**** I know I can't keep her happy. I already have lots of family and financial issues that I have to deal with. The truth is even if she stays with me I can't keep her happy and can't give her time. She deserves better. But I also don't want her to go to someone. I don't want to lose her. Only woman I feel so connected with.

 

I started to ignore her. Don't respond to her calls and talk to her much. I even shouted at her yesterday which i shouldn't. I regret it. I dont know y but i can't look at her face. I feel guilty and regretful. I can't even express well all the emotions I am feelings.

 

Now I am sitting like an idiot and crying. Created this account just today. And recalling all the times we spent together.

I think i like her..or it is just an infatuation and i will move on with time. I want to feel normal again. I want to act normal and feel normal in front of her as I used to feel earlier before. What should I do? I feel lost when i stand before her.

[preraph]

You don't really want her, but you don't want anyone else to have her. That's not infatuation or love. It's possessiveness. You are getting an ego boost by knowing she liked you, and you enjoy her friendship, and now she is going to get a boyfriend and he will get most of that attention, and you are just feeling like your favorite cat just took up with your neighbor, who offered tastier food.

 

Don't go interrupting her life by being selfish now. You've had all this time to become her boyfriend and you rejected that more than once. Let her move on and find a guy who isn't wishy-washy about his feelings for her. She deserves that, and you know it.

 

You should start dating someone new or stay busy with other friends. Be nice. You were totally wrong to yell at her.

[faithfully]

You don't really want her, but you don't want anyone else to have her. That's not infatuation or love. It's possessiveness. You are getting an ego boost by knowing she liked you, and you enjoy her friendship, and now she is going to get a boyfriend and he will get most of that attention, and you are just feeling like your favorite cat just took up with your neighbor, who offered tastier food.

 

Don't go interrupting her life by being selfish now. You've had all this time to become her boyfriend and you rejected that more than once. Let her move on and find a guy who isn't wishy-washy about his feelings for her. She deserves that, and you know it.

 

You should start dating someone new or stay busy with other friends. Be nice. You were totally wrong to yell at her.

 

 

this ^^^^^^^^ I agree with 100%

 

you messed up op and now you are being selfish.

 

if you really value her as a friend, you will leave her alone to get with this new guy, you will want her to be happy and not shouting at her.

[krm]

I suggest you to first call her and apologize her for behaving rudely and try to be normal with her. If she really likes you, she will definitely understands you. Even though you are not lovers you had a good bonding from the past two years. Unless you both like each other this may not have continued this far. Everyone need not end with love or marriage. Everyone will have their own problems. That doesn't mean that you are not worth of love or friendship. We can't guess when love will happen. If you are not interested in love you just be friend with her. Don't spoil your friendship with her. That's the most valuable thing in the world than anything. Don't misunderstand, if someone is close to her unless she confirms to you.Take your time and understand what you are expecting from her.

[Hunter17]

You don't really want her, but you don't want anyone else to have her. That's not infatuation or love. It's possessiveness. You are getting an ego boost by knowing she liked you, and you enjoy her friendship, and now she is going to get a boyfriend and he will get most of that attention, and you are just feeling like your favorite cat just took up with your neighbor, who offered tastier food.

 

Don't go interrupting her life by being selfish now. You've had all this time to become her boyfriend and you rejected that more than once. Let her move on and find a guy who isn't wishy-washy about his feelings for her. She deserves that, and you know it.

 

You should start dating someone new or stay busy with other friends. Be nice. You were totally wrong to yell at her.

 

Thank You.

I know you are right. Sounds like bitter truth and I need to accept it.

 

But it hurts to see her let her go. I accept that fact I was stupid back then.

 

But I didnt know that in future dis girl wud become so close to me. I rejected her once but she never showed any sign that she is angry with me..or i hav ever hurt her feelings. She seems to enjoy my company. I dont recall hurting her again. When did i reject her ' more than once ' ??

 

Yeah as you said I apologized. She forgive me. I'll follow as you said. Stay busy wid my own life which is best for both of us.