School is hard

[MisUnderstood1]

I'm in my last semester of this postgrad program and it is really hard. This is the last month. There're tons of assignments and I can no longer cope with the workload. I've about 7 major assignments to submit in two weeks and I feel so stressed. I also have 5 presentations. I've social anxiety and not looking forward to these presentations. I've felt so out of place with this program because you've to be a social person, which I am not. After this semester/month, we do have to do a 3-month internship before we can actually graduate, so even though this is my last month I won't graduate until I've completed the internship. You apply as you would any other job. I went to a 45-mins interview a few weeks ago for one research position I applied to (the only one I applied to) and got the job/internship. It's paid, and it starts next month and will end in the last week of July. This internship will require me to use softwares that I am pretty horrible at. I told them I am not so good at these softwares during the interview and they still hired me anyway but I am still very much worried about this because I don't want to look incompetent to them. I have little to no interest in this softwares, which makes things worse. In fact I'm realizing I've little to no interest in this program as a whole. It's something I've known for a while but I've been pushing myself to keep going. I did not want to continue into second semester in January but I pushed myself further. My marks are also not that great, so it's not that I'm doing so well. I'm not too interested in any of the courses. There's a lot of math involved and I am awful at math. The only course I've gotten an A in so far and that gave me peace of mind was last semester: my Research & Proposal Writing class. Besides this, marks have just been very bad overall and they're much worse this semester, and I'm not proud of this. Around the same time that I got into this program last year, I also got into a writing postgrad course and really regret not doing that instead. I chose this one because I thought it seemed more prestigious, not because I really wanted to do it. I did think I would like and do well in some courses but that has not been the case at all. At this point Idk what to do. I don't want to quit at this time, when I'm nearing the end of the semester but I'm not happy at all.

Edited April 6, 2016 by MisUnderstood1

[HopeForTomorrow]

My strong advice for you is to complete this postdoc because you are so near the end. If you drop out now you will have lost all the time and effort you put forth. Even if you have now realized that this is something that you don't have interest in, you never know how it might help you in the future, and if you drop out now you also likely will not be able to do something constructive with the time until the semester ends. You can always apply to the writing post-doc in the future (or another one that might interest you).

 

I suggest the same about the internship/job. They hired you so obviously they found you desirable for the position. As for the software, you were up front with them and told them you weren't experienced with it, and that's all you could do. Give it a chance. You don't get into postgraduate programs like yours if you aren't intelligent and very capable of learning. I don't think you are giving yourself enough credit.

 

I have completed two doctorates, a master's degree, and a post-doc, so I understand what you are saying about projects, exams, stress, etc. (I also understand what you are saying about not necessarily knowing what you want to do until you are most of the way through a program). I can personally vouch for the fact that I have - at one time or another - benefited from all of the degrees/programs, even those I had second thoughts about after getting into them, so I don't regret anything.

 

Sometimes when you think about all of it, it can be overwhelming. My advice, and what worked for me, was to take things one day at a time, focus on one project/exam at a time, and try not to worry about the rest of it until you get to it. You will get your way through it. Also, don't forget to find some "down" time when you can - do something that you enjoy and that relaxes you.

 

I wish you luck ~

[SammySammy]

Life is harder.

 

Acquiring knowledge is important in college, but, just as important, is developing and applying the skills and perseverance it takes to succeed.

 

Those things you mentioned are life lessons. Not just school lessons. Decisions. Attitudes. Choices. Effort. What are you going to do to move your life to a better position? That's the real test.

 

Are you going to pass or fail?

[d0nnivain]

Go to your professors & talk to them about your struggles. Perhaps at least one will let you take an incomplete & make up the work over the summer to lighten your load now. If you bring a doctor's note discussing your anxiety they should work with you.

 

Do not give up but it's OK if you need to slow the pace.