orgasms

[p.y.t.]

I'm a female in my 20's and can only have orgasms from the clitoral area. I have never been able to have one with a guy. I have tried but doesn't happen. Is there anything I can do to make it happen. It'd be nice to actually have one with my boyfriend. I still have sex and fake orgasms for him. Sex feels good to a point, just not the right way I guess. Any women or someone have any idea of what to do or maybe if this is medically related? Thanks

[clia]

No, this isn't medically related. In fact, most women share your 'problem'. I've never met a woman in my life who can have an orgasm from sex alone and no other stimulation. (Although I'm sure there are a few lucky women like that out there...)

 

You may have shot yourself in the foot by faking orgasms with your boyfriend this entire time. I can't believe you did that. You may have thought you were sparing his feelings, but in the end you didn't because if he ever finds out he will be very, very hurt. And you weren't even getting what you needed! If you felt comfortable enough with this guy to sleep with him, then why didn't you feel comfortable telling him how to please you? Sex is give and take. Sometimes it takes a little work to figure out what works for different people. You aren't abnormal in any way. So now you have the task of backing up and telling him what you like. (And I guarantee he's going to ask why you didn't tell him this before. Good luck thinking up an answer for that one.)

 

You can have an orgasm with your boyfriend, but either he or you are going to have to manually stimulate to get there. (To be honest, I'm sort of shocked that he hasn't done that yet. Is he a selfish guy? Have you ever had a real orgasm with him? I'm guessing not, because if he's smart at all he should be able to tell the difference between a fake and a real.)

 

There are different postions that you can try where there is more pressure on that area, so sex will feel better for you, and possibly even cause you to reach orgasm. You might have to get fancy, but it's worth it.

 

Also ask him to perform oral sex on you. If that doesn't get you there, I don't know what will.

 

The key thing here is to find out what works for you. It might take some time, but it's certainly better than faking orgasms for the rest of your life, isn't it?

[pussycat]

I'm a female in my 20's and can only have orgasms from the clitoral area. I have never been able to have one with a guy. I have tried but doesn't happen. Is there anything I can do to make it happen. It'd be nice to actually have one with my boyfriend. I still have sex and fake orgasms for him. Sex feels good to a point, just not the right way I guess. Any women or someone have any idea of what to do or maybe if this is medically related? Thanks

[Skitzofreakniak]

I myself have not had the opportunity to give someone a vaginal orgasm. There are lots of references on the internet for improved sex and female orgasms. I was searching for these so I could be a good lover for my girlfriend.

 

BTW Faking will hurt a lot more than you think when your man finds out. Also for some women, if you have had clitoral orgasms then Vaginal ones will feel different from them and it may even be more difficult to acheive a vaginal orgasm once you are used to the clitoral only routine. But once you have learned how (like for any type of orgasm) it's a matter of improving on it.

 

It helps to know yourself and know where you're stages of arrousal are. There are also books related to female vaginal orgasms. Trying new positions can help. There are unfortunately some women ( a low percentage is all I can remember) who cannot have vaginal orgasms because they are born that way. Vaginal orgasms require the stimulate the G-spot area which is usually about an inch inside from the outside of the opening and on the upper or front side of thr vagina. To stimulate it, deep thrusting is not of any help. From what I can remember, tryto get your man to thrust shallower in a varied pattern ( like in every 10 thrusts : 9 shallow, 1 deep then 8 shallow, 2 deep and 7 shallow, 3 deep and so on).

 

Missionary poisition is very unstimulating for most women, try spooning or with you on top so you can also control what you're feeling. You may also need to relax a lot more during sex because if you're trying to fake orgasm while trying hard to reach it as well while pleasing him you're mind is concentrating on too many things at once and get's distracted. It is for a lot of women, very hard to reach their first vaginal orgasm so don't be disappointed even after trying many times. For women it is VERY emotionally related and most of them must feel loved and comfortable with their partner to actually enjoy such an orgasm. I can't r emember what book I read but it had suggested that the psychological component was essential and once that was fulfilled the rest looked piss easy for the male to go at if he wanted to really try. I also read a book for myself called: The Multi-Orgasmic Man which was useful. Your sexual organs are not the only organs that can have an orgasm, once you have learned how, the whole body can have an orgasm. Read up on vaginal orgasms, there are books in the library which are very useful, if not internet information available for free. I'm no expert but I think, if you read up you may even find that vaginal orgasms are just one of the many types that both males and females can acheive with a little practice, patience and love :-)