Think it's over - feeling lost

[privategal]

How did you end it?

Were you firm and clear its over?

If so...Id say nothing needs to be said.

It is hard to go through the withdrawals and wishing to talk and thats what shes going through.

Any contact hurts more though when you are trying to let it go.

If you do feel the need to ask her to stop "get lost" is a little cold but "please respect my decision to end this, I would not like contact"

You might then get a "but cant we be friends"?>>>>"NO"

[struass]

I thought I'd made it crystal clear and when we talked about it not working she seemed in total agreement. I will try to keep ignoring the messages and hope it goes away.

 

In the back of my mind I always wonder if there is something I can say which will just make everything alright as in her leaving her partner and letting us have a proper go to see what happens.

 

Arrrggghhh.....why can't people just be straightforward and honest.

[privategal]

By you drawing a line in the sand that you wont be with her while she has a partner will inevitably maybe cause her to make a choice now that she sees you will no longer allow her to be a cake eater and have both.

If she is to ever be single and give it a chance with you...she must do that completely on her own.

Then...will you trust her not to do the same to you and find a partner on the side when she is unhappy?

Either way sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same.

Its very hurtful to live on a breadcrumb diet from someone unavailable.

That hot cold push pull is ultimately very damaging and confusing...you live for the hot and the pull.

You kinda lose yourself in a foggy confusion of a gray relationship.

Subconciously your trying to win at something unwinnable.

If someone has a spouse or bf/gf...thats ahuge obstacle and even if they're atteacted to you they cant give their whole heart...nor should anyone want a heart they have to convince or win.

It may be an addiction, fascination, limerance, obsession, infatuation or even true love...but....she isnt single

So you had to extricate yourself and try to seperate your emotion and realize you acted as an advocate to yourself.

You pulled yourself out because you want more and its impossible.

You are better than sharing someone else's woman.

You deserve someone all your own.

It will hurt, be hard, you'll miss her...but it really is best you take yourself out of the equation and move forward.