Asked my crush out...

[Space_Fan]

...and she said yes!

 

Ok, so, there have been a few developments in my relationship with my crush (for more info, please check my previous topics) since I last posted. Last time, I was conflicted on whether I should give her a birthday gift or not. I ended up giving her a shared birthday gift with a friend of mine, so it wouldn't seem "innapropriate". I mean, a friend who is not one of your closest friends giving you a birthday gift? I thought it would be intimidating. So I talked to a friend of mine who's closer to her and we bought her a gift together.

 

But that's in the past, so let's get to what brings me here today. Fast forward to 2 weeks ago, I talked to her on Facebook and we ended up talking for a long time, which always seems to happen whenever we talk on Facebook. When I looked at the clock, it was around 3 AM. It's funny because we don't talk nearly as much when we're together in person. I know I don't because I'm too self-conscious (and I'm starting to think that might be her case as well). Anyway, when we talked on Facebook that night, I sent her a link to the trailer of a movie I wanted to watch in the cinema and she seemed very excited about it as well. A few days later, at college, I finally had the opportunity to be alone with her (which is rare) and asked if she'd like to go with me, to which she said yes. I was really nervous, but I'm very proud of myself for being able to "ask her out" (does this qualify as a date?), after so months of doing nothing!

 

I didn't talk about it to her again in the week that followed because (to be perfectly honest) I was afraid she might call it off or something. But then, she came to talk to me on Facebook so we could schedule going to the cinema. We decided to go on April 29th, because we're buried in college stuff to do until then. But what surprised me was the fact that she took the initiative to schedule the "date". She even agreed to skipping a class so we could watch it, and usually she'd never skip classes for something like this.

 

And on Wednesday, another weird thing happened. We were working (we have some college assignments together) and I glanced at her laptop. I noticed she had her Youtube initial page open, which showed video suggestions based on other videos she watched. There were a lot of videos like "5 signs a guy likes you" and stuff like that (bear in mind that, although she's 21, she's very childish and inexperienced when it comes to love, hence why she watches that type of videos). A few minutes later, I looked back and she had exited her account, which means she was trying to hide that she had been watching those videos. I had mixed feelings about this, because it indicated she liked someone and that someone might not be me.

 

So yeah, the mixed signals are still strong, although she's been way more communicative with me than before. We're slowly growing closer. I don't know if this qualifies as a date, but at least I managed to ask her out and she not only accepted, but also seemed very excited about going to the cinema. If it is because she's going with me or she simply because she really wants to watch the movie, no idea. Do you guys have any feedback or advice at all? Any insight would be very welcome!

[hasaquestion]

I overanalyzed today. I blew it. Don't be me today and overanalyze.

[thecrucible]

I know how you feel. Sometimes if it's mixed it means you don't have enough information and you have to put your feelings to one side so you don't get too attached. You'll get better at this over time. Why do you think you blew it?

[d0nnivain]

It's a date. You are going to the movie together. Try to relax & have a good time.

 

 

Perhaps you should watch some of those videos about whether a guy likes you. See if you are doing those things. Do them if you aren't

[Space_Fan]

It's a date. You are going to the movie together. Try to relax & have a good time.

 

 

Perhaps you should watch some of those videos about whether a guy likes you. See if you are doing those things. Do them if you aren't

 

Thanks for your reply! That's actually a good idea, assuming she's interested in me. If she isn't, I'll probably make a fool of myself. But seeing how this will be our last month of classes together until September, I'll have time to get over that.

 

What I'm scared about the most is that on the way to the cinema, we don't find a topic of conversation. Like I said, I'm too self-conscious and afraid to say something I shouldn't and I think she's the same. I'll probably have to make an effort and get over the fear of saying something innapropriate. At this point, there are a lot of things I can talk with her about, that I couldn't before.

[PianoMan2016]

What I wouldn't give to understand what a yes feels like. What a world. Everyone has a boyfriend or husband at my age (I'll be 37 soon). Ethical situations where you have a bonafide single lady who you can tell your feelings to or ask out are one in a million. Who would date me anyway without experience? It's like a job. You have to have experience to get one.

 

 

I'll show myself out from this post now.

[BronzeAgeJaeger217]

...and she said yes!

 

Ok, so, there have been a few developments in my relationship with my crush (for more info, please check my previous topics) since I last posted. Last time, I was conflicted on whether I should give her a birthday gift or not. I ended up giving her a shared birthday gift with a friend of mine, so it wouldn't seem "innapropriate". I mean, a friend who is not one of your closest friends giving you a birthday gift? I thought it would be intimidating. So I talked to a friend of mine who's closer to her and we bought her a gift together.

 

But that's in the past, so let's get to what brings me here today. Fast forward to 2 weeks ago, I talked to her on Facebook and we ended up talking for a long time, which always seems to happen whenever we talk on Facebook. When I looked at the clock, it was around 3 AM. It's funny because we don't talk nearly as much when we're together in person. I know I don't because I'm too self-conscious (and I'm starting to think that might be her case as well). Anyway, when we talked on Facebook that night, I sent her a link to the trailer of a movie I wanted to watch in the cinema and she seemed very excited about it as well. A few days later, at college, I finally had the opportunity to be alone with her (which is rare) and asked if she'd like to go with me, to which she said yes. I was really nervous, but I'm very proud of myself for being able to "ask her out" (does this qualify as a date?), after so months of doing nothing!

 

I didn't talk about it to her again in the week that followed because (to be perfectly honest) I was afraid she might call it off or something. But then, she came to talk to me on Facebook so we could schedule going to the cinema. We decided to go on April 29th, because we're buried in college stuff to do until then. But what surprised me was the fact that she took the initiative to schedule the "date". She even agreed to skipping a class so we could watch it, and usually she'd never skip classes for something like this.

 

And on Wednesday, another weird thing happened. We were working (we have some college assignments together) and I glanced at her laptop. I noticed she had her Youtube initial page open, which showed video suggestions based on other videos she watched. There were a lot of videos like "5 signs a guy likes you" and stuff like that (bear in mind that, although she's 21, she's very childish and inexperienced when it comes to love, hence why she watches that type of videos). A few minutes later, I looked back and she had exited her account, which means she was trying to hide that she had been watching those videos. I had mixed feelings about this, because it indicated she liked someone and that someone might not be me.

 

So yeah, the mixed signals are still strong, although she's been way more communicative with me than before. We're slowly growing closer. I don't know if this qualifies as a date, but at least I managed to ask her out and she not only accepted, but also seemed very excited about going to the cinema. If it is because she's going with me or she simply because she really wants to watch the movie, no idea. Do you guys have any feedback or advice at all? Any insight would be very welcome!

Very shocking that she scheduled the date

[d0nnivain]

What I'm scared about the most is that on the way to the cinema, we don't find a topic of conversation. Like I said, I'm too self-conscious and afraid to say something I shouldn't and I think she's the same. I'll probably have to make an effort and get over the fear of saying something innapropriate.

 

So stay away from the inappropriate stuff. Stay away from hot controversial topics like politics, religion, abortion & money.

 

 

Instead ask Qs & offer your opinions. Ask about the last movie you saw with the actors in the film you will be seeing. Ask get to know you questions: what other colleges did she look at before choosing the one you attend; how is her job search going? Talk about your childhoods -- what did you want to be when you grew up. Discuss favorites: books, movies, music, etc.

 

 

Try not to psych yourself out.

[RedPurpleOrange]

Don't be afraid to be yourself, don't curb yourself. In the long run...it'll put her off you if you do. Be a little bit quirky, a bit interesting.

 

 

A few more subjects: Ghosts. Animals. Little green men from outer space. Beards. Goofy's usually good. Just be humorous with it.

[Erik30]

Just talk about the same stuff you do on Facebook. You two obviously have a lot in common, or else you wouldn't be able to talk for hours. (Online)

 

Also try to change the way you're thinking. You're going out with her to have some fun, not to win her over and to make her like you. Don't put her on a pedestal, she's probably just as nervous as you are.