my Religion and Society makes me asexual !

[Phoenician]

Words I have never heard from a women ; but it is always obvious to me that when meeting highly religious women or women pressured by society ( in my place in lebanon/Middle east majority are).

 

I am interested to hear answers from other parts of the world .

 

-Is society and religion pressuring Women to punish men at your place ? -where you come from ?

[TaraMaiden2]

I'm sorry, what on earth are you talking about?

Punish?

In what way?

What kind of a weird question is that?

 

Your Religion/society doesn't make you 'asexual'.

 

Either you do, or biology does.

 

asexual

eɪˈsɛksjʊəl,-ʃʊəl

adjective

1.

without sexual feelings or associations.

"she wore a grey frock, discreet and asexual"

2.

BIOLOGY

(of reproduction) not involving the fusion of gametes.

noun

1.

a person who has no sexual feelings or desires.

 

Do you mean 'celibate?

 

(That's still your choice, by the way.)

[Gloria25]

I'm tired of people using "buzzwords" to address something instead of explaining it. "Asexual" is one of the latest buzzwords that I'm getting sick of.

 

If I were a woman who lived in a culture, country, etc that is ruled by religious zealots - who force me to marry creeps as as my only options in life, of course I'd loose interest in sex all together...geesh

 

I mean, "Asexual" is a term used to describe people who lack an interest in sex, no? Well instead of just blurting "Asexual" just say what's going on with you (ie, 'I'm not interested in sex cuz I think I'm ugly, confused about my sexuality, can't get a date, parents raised me to think sex is dirty...')

[BetheButterfly]

Words I have never heard from a women ; but it is always obvious to me that when meeting highly religious women or women pressured by society ( in my place in lebanon/Middle east majority are).

 

I am interested to hear answers from other parts of the world .

 

-Is society and religion pressuring Women to punish men at your place ? -where you come from ?

 

Islam in many parts of the world forces women to be more covered than men. It also denies the freedom of religion and the freedom of no religion.

 

So, Islamic societies do tend to pressure women to be "asexual" in a way. That's not to punish men; that's supposedly to protect her chastity.

 

Islam needs an intense reformation to change this. This is very difficult because moderate Muslims who try to reform Sharia are in danger.

 

Both Judaism and Christianity have undergone reformations. These reformations helped lead religious zealots to understand that people have the right to freedom, including the freedom to apostate or simply never become religious. That's very important.

 

Religious zealots who don't accept freedom of speech and freedom of religion are dangerous.

 

As a religious zealot (a Christian who takes what Jesus Christ says very seriously), I believe it's important for other people to criticize what I believe and to not believe what I do. They are just as free to express their opinions as I am.

 

Does my religious beliefs pressure me, a Christian woman, to punish men? No. They motivate me to not commit adultery against my husband, but I don't consider that a punishment to men.

 

While horribly, Christian history includes persecuting people who believe differently, that's not what Jesus Christ commanded. Jesus didn't order his followers to fight or persecute people who don't believe in him. While he commanded his followers to testify about him, he didn't command them to force others to believe the same.

 

So, to simply answer your questions:

-Is society and religion pressuring Women to punish men at your place ? -where you come from ?

No. I'm from a country considered to be "Christian" or at least with a population of many Christians.

 

While Christian history sadly includes disobeying Jesus and persecuting others who don't believe , Christianity in the USA includes accepting freedom of religion and freedom of speech. This doesn't punish men or women.

Edited April 20, 2016 by BetheButterfly

[Gloria25]

How is Islam forcing women to be asexual?

 

In Western society, where women have all this "freedom", I've lost count of women who stopped having sex with their men (especially husbands) for all kind of silly and selfish reasons. They also gain weight, let go of their appearance, etc...to the point someone oughta force them to wear a burka to cover up how sloppy they look.

 

I'm going on three years without getting laid for many reasons (stress, unavailablity of worthy suitors) and it has nothing to do with religious beliefs alone.

 

Maybe women simply don't put sex as a priority as men do.. women can get their satisfaction in lif out of kids, family, hugs/money from their men, while men need the physical act of sex itself.

[BetheButterfly]

How is Islam forcing women to be asexual?

 

1.) Islam includes the directive for women to be covered. This usually takes the form of a hijab for less strict Muslims, or a burka for more strict Muslims. Being covered promotes an asexual quality. For example, your avatar and mine are both forbidden in pure Islam. Why? Too sexual.

 

2.) Islamic cultures often prohibit dating. Many marriages in Islamic countries are arranged and sometimes are against the girl or woman's wishes. When a couple has not gotten to know each other before marriage, this often affects the desire of the girl or women for sex. Would you like to have sex with someone your Dad arranged you to marry even though you didn't want to do so?

 

3.) Women are not supposed to flirt in Islam in public. If you go to an Islamic country, please notice that you won't see flirty behavior being condoned in public places. Why? It's not allowed in Islam.

 

In Western society, where women have all this "freedom", I've lost count of women who stopped having sex with their men (especially husbands) for all kind of silly and selfish reasons. They also gain weight, let go of their appearance, etc...to the point someone oughta force them to wear a burka to cover up how sloppy they look.

 

I'm going on three years without getting laid for many reasons (stress, unavailablity of worthy suitors) and it has nothing to do with religious beliefs alone.

Western society is not ruled by Islamic beliefs, or by Christian beliefs either. (Western society used to be ruled by an interpretation of Christian beliefs, long time ago.)

 

Maybe women simply don't put sex as a priority as men do.. women can get their satisfaction in lif out of kids, family, hugs/money from their men, while men need the physical act of sex itself.

Many women do need the physical act of sex too. I do; that's one of the reasons I married my husband.

[Jabron1]

How is Islam forcing women to be asexual?

 

It's not about forcing them to be asexual. It's about prizing a virgin. The women in Islamic culture are expected to remain a virgin until they're married.

 

It's similar in Romany culture. There's a girl that I know, and her family are friends with my family. Her parents and brothers watch her like a hawk . They have tried to set me up with her a few times, but I'm not interested in marriage.

 

These things are happening in the West too. I assure you.

 

In Western society, where women have all this "freedom", I've lost count of women who stopped having sex with their men (especially husbands) for all kind of silly and selfish reasons. They also gain weight, let go of their appearance, etc...to the point someone oughta force them to wear a burka to cover up how sloppy they look.

 

More fool those men for tolerating it.

 

Maybe women simply don't put sex as a priority as men do..

 

Men have about 15 times the testosterone that women do. So sex is very important for us.

 

Imagine getting to the horny part of your monthly cycle. Now imagine that times 10. Now imagine walking around like that every day.

 

Sometimes I wonder if women prioritize attention over sex?

Edited April 20, 2016 by Jabron1

[BetheButterfly]

It's not about forcing them to be asexual. It's about prizing a virgin. The women in Islamic culture are expected to remain a virgin until they're married.

 

After marriage, they're also expected to be covered in some way and not look "sexy" in public.

 

Muslims are different though. One of my Muslim friends from Morocco argued with me about my Muslim friend from Turkey. My Muslim friend from Turkey is modest but doesn't wear a hijab. My Muslim friend from Morocco does and insists that a Muslim woman who doesn't wear a hijab is not a "true Muslim" ...

 

My Turkish Muslim friend is under constant pressure from stricter Muslims to conform to Sharia.

 

It's similar in Romany culture. There's a girl that I know, and her family are friends with my family. Her parents and brothers watch her like a hawk . They have tried to set me up with her a few times, but I'm not interested in marriage.

Ooh, I don't know where to put this, but I found and watched an interesting video about Roma people enduring persecution in Europe.

 

It is horrible but it's important that the word is getting out about what they suffered. People need to know the truth. in my opinion, it is important to care about all people, no matter their differences.

 

"The Struggle for Survival of the Roma People..."

 

When you have time, I'm really interested in reading what your grandmother shared with you.

 

 

These things are happening in the West too. I assure you.

Depends on the individuals, not dictated by religious organizations. The West has had its share of church and state issues, when the church had more control over the state. That was a horrible disaster.

 

Christians trying to force people to live to their own interpretation has hurt a lot of people. And, while I disagree, I understand when people accuse Christianity of hurting peoples' sexuality. They have logical reasons for believing this, though again, I disagree.

Edited April 20, 2016 by BetheButterfly

[Gloria25]

Islam has women cover up in "public". They are free to be sexual with their men in private...it's called "modesty".

 

You don't have to dress with your stuff hanging all out there to be a passionate and/or sexy person. I literally dress like an old lady, sometimes I look like a bum (except if I'm on with my man and/or clubbing)...in the bedroom, I'm a vixen. Fredericks of Hollywood and 3 wishes might call me a preferred customer.

 

I mean, I look at all these women putting up stupid selfies of themselves half naked and for what? Cover up yourself already. Stop showing off your goodies for free. There was a time men could only see goodies if they paid for it. Think, I'm gonna let men ogle me and get hardons for free? I reserve my goodies for my man.

[mellywell]

We need a lesson on what an asexual is: asexual means "I do not have sexual feelings or feelings of sexual desire or sexual attraction." One can be asexual and still have romantic feelings. It is one stop along the spectrum of sexuality, and it is not "caused" by religion.

 

And no, being religiously conservative does not cause asexuality, nor does it doom a woman to being repressed. One of the most conservative Christian women I know practically swing from the chandeliers in the bedroom lol

[Jabron1]

"The Struggle for Survival of the Roma People..."

 

When you have time, I'm really interested in reading what your grandmother shared with you.

 

Thanks for the video. I'll check it out.

 

I doubt my gran said anything that you don't already know, because you seem a very well informed person. But it was a shock to a stupid kid that thinks he knows it all . Especially when we learnt about the holocaust for months in school, and never heard about that.

 

She was lucky for living in England. But there are other Romanies that came here during or after the war for whom life was far worse.

 

Depends on the individuals, not dictated by religious organizations.

 

I think it's more of an integration issue, than a religious one.

[Rejected Rosebud]

I'm sorry, what on earth are you talking about?

Punish?

In what way?

What kind of a weird question is that?

 

Your Religion/society doesn't make you 'asexual'.

 

 

Also, if you're an asexual person, you are not "punishing" your partner or anybody. You are being who you are. If somebody chooses to be married to an asexual person, they have signed up for no sex. Clearly.

[Jabron1]

We need a lesson on what an asexual is: asexual means "I do not have sexual feelings or feelings of sexual desire or sexual attraction." One can be asexual and still have romantic feelings. It is one stop along the spectrum of sexuality, and it is not "caused" by religion.

 

And no, being religiously conservative does not cause asexuality, nor does it doom a woman to being repressed. One of the most conservative Christian women I know practically swing from the chandeliers in the bedroom lol

 

I took it as meaning a more sexually controlled environment.

 

I have no idea why he's using the word 'asexual' (which I take as having no desire to have sex), or why he used the words 'punishing men'.

[BetheButterfly]

Thanks for the video. I'll check it out.

 

I doubt my gran said anything that you don't already know, because you seem a very well informed person.

 

Thanks, but I don't know much about the Roma people or what they have suffered. You helped me realize that their story needs to be told too, and listened to by the world. You motivated me to research them, which is how I found the Vice News Youtube. The Roma children broke my heart; the girl at the end of the video looks like my best friend when I was growing up. When I put myself in their shoes, I understand their frustration.

 

I think it's more of an integration issue, than a religious one.

That's a good point. While I could be wrong, the OP does seem to tie a religious reason into women being "assexual" so it is interesting to reflect why.

 

Back in the Victorian Era, religion was one of the reasons for oppressed sexuality in women.

 

"Biblical Christianity was thickly intertwined in the fabric of Victorian society." Victorian Religion of Christianity

 

"Women were considered to be a sign of purity and cleanliness except during their menstrual cycles. Their bodies were treated as temples as a result of which they could not be engaged in any vigorous activity or even pleasurable sex."

Roles Of Women In The Victorian Era

 

So, religion does have an affect on sexuality, same as it has on other issues.

 

Christian women nowadays are more free in their sexuality than they were a long time ago, thanks to these reformations and also to put it bluntly, thanks to secularism.

 

Some Christians are more liberal in their sexuality than other Christians.

 

For example in sexuality and dress: I've personally been accused of being immodest and unBiblical for wearing sundresses. I understand why I am accused of that, but I do believe I have a right as a Christian to wear a sundress if I want. In some strict Christian colleges, my sundresses are not allowed, and that's fine. What's modest to me is not modest to other people, and visa versa.

 

Similarly, there are some Christian ladies who believe it's fine to wear bikinis in public. While I personally believe that bikinis are too immodest and too "sexy in public", Christian women and every other group of women are free to wear bikinis if they want.

 

Their sexuality is not governed by my religious views anymore than my sexuality is governed by the Amish, who don't believe sundresses are modest. (My hubby has jokingly called me "Amish" before because bikinis seem to be a norm for our generation: for Christians and non-Christians alike...)

Edited April 20, 2016 by BetheButterfly

[mellywell]

Also, if you're an asexual person, you are not "punishing" your partner or anybody. You are being who you are. If somebody chooses to be married to an asexual person, they have signed up for no sex. Clearly.

 

This is presuming that the asexual person A)realizes they are asexual and B)was honest with their partner about it. I agree that if you date and marry someone who is up front about being asexual, you have no right to complain down the road.

[Rejected Rosebud]

This is presuming that the asexual person A)realizes they are asexual and B)was honest with their partner about it.

Well, the OP's premise is that his society, religion and culture makes women be asexual. If that's the case, then it's no surprise if men end up married to asexual women. I'm not getting where this adds up to "punishing" men, in any case. Women are subjugated by MEN in that scenario. So I guess it's the men who are punishing themselves.

[Phoenician]

Guys ,

First of all I respect all your opinions ; however there are couple of things I would like to clarify ...

 

"-Is society and religion pressuring Women to punish men at your place ? -where you come from ? "

__________________

my question rephrased in order not to be misunderstood:

 

"Are women in Other parts of the world pressured by society and religion ? if yes where are you from ?"

 

are Men Paying a price of such pressure ?

_____________________

 

 

Please take into consideration that english isnt my mother lang , so sometimes communication issues occurs because of my bad lang ....

 

 

---

[Phoenician]

The other thing is that :

 

- In Lebanon , we don't have camels , we don't have deserts

 

-Lebanon is a place where 18 different sects and religions Coexist ....

 

 

- Hijab is not common , Shariaa is not the law .

 

Please don't turn this thread into a religious debate , the question is not specicfic to Islam nor what is right or wrong .

 

It is raising a flag that Social Traits and pressures are affecting Women sexual behavior more than men , and Men are also paying a big price too because of the snow ball .

 

The pressure on women in religious/conservative societies Vs the bad use of woman in adds and Media ( in western/open Societies) are both negatively affecting the sexual desires of woman , pushing her to build a china wall in front of Men ; even sometimes her own partner ...

Edited April 22, 2016 by Phoenician

[BetheButterfly]

Guys ,

First of all I respect all your opinions ; however there are couple of things I would like to clarify ...

 

"-Is society and religion pressuring Women to punish men at your place ?

 

No lol.

 

-where you come from ? "

 

USA

 

 

__________________

my question rephrased in order not to be misunderstood:

 

"Are women in Other parts of the world pressured by society and religion ?

 

In some places yes.

 

if yes where are you from ?"

 

USA

 

are Men Paying a price of such pressure ?

_____________________

 

No, though if you ask some men, they might say yes.

[BetheButterfly]

 

-Lebanon is a place where 18 different sects and religions Coexist ....

 

The religions of Islam and Christianity are being discussed.

 

 

- Hijab is not common

 

Are there women in Lebanon who wear the hijab?

 

, Shariaa is not the law .

 

Does Hezbollah agree with you on that?

 

"Jabhat al-Nusra in Tripoli, Lebanon"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=shbLE1euhy4

 

Please don't turn this thread into a religious debate , the question is not specicfic to Islam nor what is right or wrong .

 

If you ask a question about how religion influences people, please be prepared to get discussions on different religions, including Islam. Christianity has been discussed too. Both religions have affected people's sexual actions in various ways. For example, both religions discourage adultery, correct?

 

It is raising a flag that Social Traits and pressures are affecting Women sexual behavior more than men ,

 

Religious pressure is probably the most greatest pressure, since the idea of being punished or rewarded for eternity has a huge impact on some people.

 

Out of curiosity, why do you think social traits and pressures affect women sexually more than men?

 

and Men are also paying a big price too because of the snow ball .

 

Could you be more specific please?

 

The pressure on women in religious/conservative societies Vs the bad use of woman in adds and Media ( in western/open Societies) are both negatively affecting the sexual desires of woman

 

Well, here many people don't see women in media as a bad thing. I don't, though I do have a problem with women in bikinis on billboards. I identify as a Christian, and the reason I believe bikinis are immodest in public is because of my religion. However, other people are free to disagree with me, including people who also identify as Christian.

 

, pushing her to build a china wall in front of Men

 

I have a wall against anything sexual with anybody except for my hubby. That's because of my religion, and i don't think that's a bad thing.

; even sometimes her own partner ...

 

This is an issue some religious people face. The following may give you some good tips.

 

This is a quote from the article:

 

"God designed sex for the ultimate physical experience of oneness. Sex is intimate and vulnerable…those things are hard for the flesh. God designed wives to be helpers for their husbands. Why should we think that doesn’t include helping him sexually, being available to our husbands for sex and being initiators of it? My flesh fights this. My flesh reminds me that I have two kids, that I am tired all the time, that I am working all the time, that we are remodeling our house…. "

https://unveiledwife.com/decide-initiate-fight-breaks-instead/

 

 

Out of curiosity, is your wife religious? Is she a Muslim or a Christian or ?

 

Regardless, I hope and pray that you and your wife found joy and sexual fulfillment with each other!

[Phoenician]

Beth ,My wife is Muslim , I don't pray much , but I take from Religion the good thing .

 

Though she is religious (but doesn't wear Hijab); she doesn't Really consider man the way religious ppl do ..

 

 

 

God bless your soul .

[LookAtThisPOst]

"Asexual" is one of the latest buzzwords that I'm getting sick of.

 

Get used to it because there's now, "Pansexual", "sapiosexual", and a few other made-up words to describe sexuality.

 

I don't get it.

[Cablebandit]

Find you a non believer and enjoy sex. The Abrahamic religions love to control and oppress women and often make them feel dirty about their natural desires.