ran into the ex

[fiskadoro]

Today I was at a Starbucks a bit far from my house and I saw my ex. We dated for 10 months, have been broken up for 8. At first she tried to patch things up, but after two months she threw in the towel. I broke it off with her because i didn't feel a big enough part of her life - she wouldn't introduce me to any of her friends. However, she was just getting divorced and felt that she didn't need to introduce me just yet, she felt bad about "hiding me" but at the same time said that when she was divorced she would consider a more serious relationship and marriage. I was pressuring her to marry, crazy I know.

 

Long story short, at first it was a amicable flirty breakup, but when she gave up trying to get back with me she told me she would answer texts only if I had a question and never texted or called me. From that time I texted her about once or twice a month, last time being Jan 2nd to wish her a happy birthday. She never replied. I haven't texted, called or seen her at all since Jan 2. I saw her first, she was in line and it seemed when she noticed me she kind of hid a bit behind another customer. I decided to go speak to her anyway - it seemed childish not to, and I still love her so I wanted to see if there was a vibe there.

 

There seemed not to be. She was friendly but reserved, smiled a bit and answered my questions but asked me none. Finally, she told me (unprompted) that she was getting baptized as a Jehovah's Witness next week. I congratulated her, she got her drinks and left. The whole thing was less than 5 minutes I guess.

 

I felt it was mature to at least go say hi, and if there would be any connection or spark I had to at least initiate it. I didn't ask her out, say I'd call her, hopefully I didn't look thirsty. I did say "you look good" but she just replied thanks.

 

Should I have just ignored her and not gone up and made small talk?

[Trinity_84]

I think it's at least nice to say hello, or wave, or anything. After all, this person meant something to you at some point in your life. I have one ex from over 7 years ago that I've ran into (right after our BR and last time was 2 years ago) and he always pretends like he doesn't know who I am. It doesn't bother me in the slightest, but I can't help feeling like he might still harbor some resentment towards me, and after all these years that's just a bit sad. You don't want to be that "sad" ex, it's better to kill them with kindness.