Girlfromcali Posted April 30, 2016 Share Posted April 30, 2016 MrsB the Kid, In case you haven't see my post on another thread; I know a girl (widow) who has been waiting for 30 years for a MM to leave his wife. BS knows about AP and sits on the fence. MM sits on the fence. AP sits on the fence. Every so often MM & BS have a row and BS throws WS out. He then goes around to AP's. After so long BS begs him to go back. He goes back. Lather rinse & repeat. I asked AP why WS can't make a decision, and she says AP is waiting for BS to divorce him I asked her why in the name of sweet reason she would want to be associated with such a spineless creep and she hasn't spoken to me since. Is this really what you want for yourself? Really? Why can't all three of them just live together and have a polyamory relationship? That would be less complicated. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Grapesofwrath Posted April 30, 2016 Share Posted April 30, 2016 They are aware, there's been police involvement before. I've also got a lawyer. For the moment MM is staying away as it is too dodgy. Does your MM express a desire to protect you from your ex? It seems that he knows first-hand already that he is unstable. Is he helping you to get some distance and safety? It seems like he is being passive and cowardly here, too. IMO, if a man loves a woman and she is in real physical danger, he would do what he could to help protect her, not hide in the bushes to avoid detection. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted April 30, 2016 Share Posted April 30, 2016 They are aware, there's been police involvement before. I've also got a lawyer. For the moment MM is staying away as it is too dodgy. Does your MM express a desire to protect you from your ex? It seems that he knows first-hand already that he is unstable. Is he helping you to get some distance and safety? It seems like he is being passive and cowardly here, too. IMO, if a man loves a woman and she is in real physical danger, he would do what he could to help protect her, not hide in the bushes to avoid detection. That thought crossed my mind too I must admit 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrsBilliethekid Posted April 30, 2016 Author Share Posted April 30, 2016 Yes of course but neither of us has any desire for mm and ex to be rolling about the street. Unfortunately although mm is closer to me than his wife he's still about an hours drive away. Link to post Share on other sites
Grapesofwrath Posted April 30, 2016 Share Posted April 30, 2016 Yes of course but neither of us has any desire for mm and ex to be rolling about the street. Unfortunately although mm is closer to me than his wife he's still about an hours drive away. I'm not suggesting that they come to blows. But perhaps he could help you with getting your restraining order set up. Or help you install an additional lock on your door. Or any number of other things designed to keep you safe from harm. I know it's difficult to hear, but please listen to the advise given by the posters here. You are now in a place where you are making one excuse after another for your MM's abysmal behavior. Step away from this toxic relationship. I know it feels like something is better than nothing. But it's really not. Link to post Share on other sites
ShatteredLady Posted April 30, 2016 Share Posted April 30, 2016 Has he told you WHY his wife changed her mind about relocation? Why would she prefer her H took 'any old job', probably paying a lot less money, just so she doesn't have to move away? (Not that I think he'd tell you the truth) I know that I was making a good life for us in the USA. My H has a high paying job. We live in a dream house, truly, I never imagined I would ever live in a house like this! We're moving back to the UK. We're moving in with MY PARENTS! I left home & bought my own apartment when I was 17. My H doesn't have a job to go to in England! I NEED to be close to my family & friends because MY H CAN'T BE TRUSTED!! I'm too vulnerable to put all of my faith in my H. Are you sure that you're his first? Does a history of adultery explain a lot about her? Forcing her to be so broken & miserable that she files for divorce is beyond cruel (if that's what he's truly doing). If he really wants her to leave him why not let her know that he's cheating on her? She's going to find out about you anyway if the divorce so he can be with you. I'm not believing the whole 'he's protecting you' & he's definitely NOT protecting his wife from devastation...quite the opposite!! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted April 30, 2016 Share Posted April 30, 2016 GirlfromCali #51, Why can't all three of them just live together and have a polyamory relationship? That would be less complicated. As far as I can gather they each want him all to themselves, though Lord alone knows why 4 Link to post Share on other sites
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