Richierich954 Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 (edited) My girlfriend has several guy friends that are madly in love with her she constantly tells me they wanna be with her. One of these guys she goes to his house and while she is there I can't call her. Then she tells me he told her to listen to the words of a love song and plays it daily when I'm around back to back to back. Another guy that loves her she goes drinking with and I can't call during those times either. On top of that she met a guy on the beach and while she was with him, sent me to voicemail 19 times.She also told me she likes tall guys and I'm 5/10. There's also another guy madly in love with her coming back in the picture. This guy walks up while we are on the phone, she ignores me and starts telling him I'm insecure and have trust issues. Am I wrong for feeling insecure in thus relationship? Please give me some feedback cause she says I'm ruining the relationship with my insecurities. Thank you. Edited May 4, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator added material from duplicate post ~6 Link to post Share on other sites
sunking101 Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 Well it's kinda normal for people to not want their partner to call them when the're busy with friends. However, the love song thing is bang out of order if indeed it is a love song! How sure are you that these guys are in love with your g/f or possibly trying to prise her away? If that's the case then an ultimatum is in order, followed by a swift dumping if she doesn't comply. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 you have every right to feel insecure.....i would even add pissed off......she goes to guys houses and you cant call her there....big red flag.. boyfriends should be able to contact their gfs....at any place .....not like a million times while at work or whatever....but visiting...or out and about....you should feel secure in knowing your gf will answer your call and not send you to voicemail 19 times.... her belittling you in front of another guy....thats a down right neon red flag...talk to her....stand up and say whats right and what isnt....how would she feel if it were you doing what she is doing..............deb 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Richierich954 Posted May 4, 2016 Author Share Posted May 4, 2016 Real sure. She constants tells me they wanna be with her. One guy even went as far as to buy a new truck that she would like. Shouldn't these type of friends be kept in their place or at least not thrown in my face? Thank you for your feedback Link to post Share on other sites
Scarlett.O'hara Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 Her behavior isn't that of a loving, kind, and faithful girlfriend. Is she an escort or something? Is why she has to be alone with them and not be disturbed? Leading other guys on is pathetic and disrespectful. Whatever is going on she sounds like she wants you all to make fools of yourselves over her. Frankly, the way you describe her I'm struggling to see why you are even with her? She has no respect for you which should be a minumum requirement in girlfriend, right? By putting up with this treatment you are basically telling her that it is ok, and that you have no self respect. Stand up for yourself and don't let this girl treat you like this. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
trippi1432 Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 I would have to ask, is this really the kind of woman you want for a girlfriend? Her putting you down in front of her friends would have been the next point of contention to walk away from this relationship. That's not insecurity to want to be respected. Before this girlfriend, what picture of yourself would you paint? How have your past relationships been? How have the past girlfriends behaved and acted in the relationship? It may not be you acting insecure, it may be the relationship and her behavior that makes it seem that way. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Poutrew Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 Well, I'd say that she was playing you the same way a master violinist would play a Stradivarius... only it wouldn't be true because you really aren't her boyfriend. Sounds like this girl uses men for self validation. She is way too narcissistic to be in love with anyone but herself. She includes you in her orbit only because you let her dominate you. You need to tell her to go to truck boys house for dinner because if he bought a truck only to impress her, then he will probably be able to take her out for the finest French cuisine. Then give her a 5 dollar McDonalds gift certificate and tell her as your girlfriend you will spare no expense to give her the finest genetically altered food available. Tell her to go ahead and order and to not wait for you. Then, find a real woman who can love you the way a real woman can love a real man, and be happy. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 My girlfriend has several guy friends that are madly in love with her she constantly tells me they wanna be with her. One of these guys she goes to his house and while she is there I can't call her. Then she tells me he told her to listen to the words of a love song and plays it daily when I'm around back to back to back. Another guy that loves her she goes drinking with and I can't call during those times either. On top of that she met a guy on the beach and while she was with him, sent me to voicemail 19 times.She also told me she likes tall guys and I'm 5/10. There's also another guy madly in love with her coming back in the picture. This guy walks up while we are on the phone, she ignores me and starts telling him I'm insecure and have trust issues. Am I wrong for feeling insecure in thus relationship? Please give me some feedback cause she says I'm ruining the relationship with my insecurities. Thank you. Here is all the feedback you need. Get rid of her. She has multiple boyfriends, not just you. Let her be some other poor sap's problem. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 Then give her a 5 dollar McDonalds gift certificate and tell her as your girlfriend you will spare no expense to give her the finest genetically altered food available. Tell her to go ahead and order and to not wait for you. I would go with Arby's. The farts are way nastier....If I was OP I actually would consider taking her for a ride to the drive thru during the break up and then locking the windows and door and dropping ass on her after a full Beef and Cheddar Value Meal with Curly Fries and a Jamocha Shake and make her smell it for 20 minutes before kicking her out of the car and telling her it was over. Crass to some, but I would consider it a classy move. lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
lolablue17 Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 I don't think you should judge her, and she shouldn't judge you. As long as she's honest (and it seems she is), there's nothing wrong with any of her habits or demands. There is also nothing wrong with your feelings about it. For example, if it was me, the next time she would have told me not to call her while she's spending social time with one of her guy friends, I wouldn't have called her, and would have continued not calling her at all - meaning - "Bye bye, I don't want you any more, we don't fit, I'm moving on, good luck with your life." It still doesn't say that she's doing something wrong. it only means i don't like to get restraining orders by my GF in my relationship, I don't like relationship dictated by one side, I don't like Gd who doesn't really care about my feelings. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 Normally I would agree with Lola on most things, but not this time. Dude, she playing you. She spends time alone at some other dude's house and you are not allowed to call her?!?! BIG TIME RED FLAG!!! I hate to say it to you, but you need to let this one go. She's playing games and probably cheating on you. Life is too short to be playing these games. Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 As long as she's honest (and it seems she is), there's nothing wrong with any of her habits or demands. There is also nothing wrong with your feelings about it. All the more reason OP should dump this chick. She is telegraphing her moves. It reads 'These guys may or may not be getting in my pants, but I am letting you know now the possibilities do exist it will happen sooner or later and you will just have to accept iy because I'm so hot and sexy and everyone wants me." Do you think some guy buys a truck to impress her if he hasn't already had a sample of the goods? My last post was insane because of the insanity of this entire situation. Why would someone put up with another person doing this to them? That is totally insane. Lola I know you dispense advice in general with a glass half full analogy, and that is a credit to you most of the time. However the only thing in this glass is lukewarm spit and this poor guy is drinking it. Link to post Share on other sites
lolablue17 Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 Lola I know you dispense advice in general with a glass half full analogy, and that is a credit to you most of the time. However the only thing in this glass is lukewarm spit and this poor guy is drinking it. :D:D I like your style... I think we share the same view on that matter. The difference is that you express your opinion in the same way you talk to your friends. I don't know him, or her. so I try to be more careful. Link to post Share on other sites
kgcolonel Posted May 4, 2016 Share Posted May 4, 2016 OP....just out of curiosity....are you helping her out in any way??? School assistance, money etc? This really sounds like she's got several guys hanging around and there's a reason for each one. Just a quick question: Why would a guy be okay with a girl going to another guys place, knowing he's after her goodies and accepting that she is telling you, "you can't call me while I'm there"? This sounds like she's "busy" there and you might disturb her rhythm....just what it sounds like to me. Call me negative nellie if you like. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Art.at.Heart Posted May 5, 2016 Share Posted May 5, 2016 My girlfriend has several guy friends that are madly in love with her she constantly tells me they wanna be with her. One of these guys she goes to his house and while she is there I can't call her. Then she tells me he told her to listen to the words of a love song and plays it daily when I'm around back to back to back. Another guy that loves her she goes drinking with and I can't call during those times either. On top of that she met a guy on the beach and while she was with him, sent me to voicemail 19 times.She also told me she likes tall guys and I'm 5/10. There's also another guy madly in love with her coming back in the picture. This guy walks up while we are on the phone, she ignores me and starts telling him I'm insecure and have trust issues. Am I wrong for feeling insecure in thus relationship? Please give me some feedback cause she says I'm ruining the relationship with my insecurities. Thank you. Following the advice preceding my post, you're better off leaving this girl. She values male attention more than she does her relationship with you. I wouldn't be surprised if snapped one of these times she rattled off stories about guys being "in love" with her. Just imagining that now is maddening... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dannyglow Posted May 7, 2016 Share Posted May 7, 2016 (edited) My girlfriend has several guy friends that are madly in love with her she constantly tells me they wanna be with her. One of these guys she goes to his house and while she is there I can't call her. Then she tells me he told her to listen to the words of a love song and plays it daily when I'm around back to back to back. Another guy that loves her she goes drinking with and I can't call during those times either. On top of that she met a guy on the beach and while she was with him, sent me to voicemail 19 times.She also told me she likes tall guys and I'm 5/10. There's also another guy madly in love with her coming back in the picture. This guy walks up while we are on the phone, she ignores me and starts telling him I'm insecure and have trust issues. Am I wrong for feeling insecure in thus relationship? Please give me some feedback cause she says I'm ruining the relationship with my insecurities. Thank you. I agree with another poster, yeah it sounds like she just doesn't value you. Lack of respect and value of you and your relationship. I won't put words in your mouth, but maybe you see her and yourself as a relationship, but she sees you and her as an open relationship or something like an elaborate fling. Sounds more like at this point in her life, she likes attention rather than a relationship, wherever and however she can get that attention. And if she is alone with someone, whether its purely a friend, or as you say a "guy who openly does not want to be friends with her".... than you have every right to feel like you do. I would say either something is going on physically behind your back, sadly, or she is keeping her options open. Probably more about keeping her options open. She probably does not feel secure or you do not trust her. I would have a hard time trusting someone with the balls to do that to me too. Who wouldn't? Tell her how you feel about the way she is treating you. She knows exactly what she is doing. Edited May 7, 2016 by dannyglow Link to post Share on other sites
MrBossMan Posted May 8, 2016 Share Posted May 8, 2016 She's up to something. I've seen this exact situation so many times, you wouldn't believe it. Dump her and find someone who doesn't collect men. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts