Author PinkSunset Posted July 22, 2016 Author Share Posted July 22, 2016 Speak your doctor ASAP, Zoloft and Ativan are not good in pregnancy. "antidepressants, especially SSRIs, can increase the risk of autism and birth defects if taken while pregnant." https://www.drugwatch.com/ssri/pregnancy/ Lorazepam - Use should be avoided - https://www.drugs.com/pregnancy/lorazepam.html OMG. This is not okay I am in tears in my office. I should probably go home Link to post Share on other sites
Lobe Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 OMG. This is not okay I am in tears in my office. I should probably go home Can you get an emergency visit to your dr? Is there a planned parenthood chapter in your area that you can visit and get some information? https://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-center 2 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 OMG. This is not okay I am in tears in my office. I should probably go home Maybe you can just stop the meds, but speak to your doctor first. Sudden withdrawal of SSRIs can cause withdrawal symptoms, but as you have just started taking them you may just be able to stop them pretty quickly, but do nothing until you have spoken to a doctor. Link to post Share on other sites
Lobe Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 One more thing before I head off (I'm gone on holidays for a couple of weeks so I don't know when I'll be able to check in again!) Everything you are thinking about right now is pure speculation. Remember to BREATHE. There are worse things than being pregnant. There are worse things than terminating an unplanned pregnancy when there is a risk due to a drug conflict. There are worse things than being a single parent. There are worse things than a child with autism. You need to get tested and talk to your dr before anything is decided. BREATHE. You will be OK. You WILL be OK. ((((((((pinksunset)))))) yeah, that's a real virtual hug inside my personal bubble even... 3 Link to post Share on other sites
heartwhole Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 Deep breaths. I would definitely stop the Ativan but the SSRI is not an immediate danger. I have myriad health problems and during pregnancy and breastfeeding, I often called the Infant Risk hotline at Texas Tech university. They have all the latest research. So many practitioners take the approach that you should just avoid all risk by not taking any medications, but mothers who really need them can suffer as a result when the risk is actually incredibly small. Texas Tech says that the risk of birth defects from SSRIs is 0.2%, and that Zoloft has the lowest ratio of serum found in umbilical cord samples of all SSRIs. Antidepressant Use During Pregnancy and Breastfeeding | InfantRisk Center Link to post Share on other sites
heartwhole Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 I just sent you a PM. Texas Tech University here in the US has an infant risk center that you can call and speak directly to a nurse for the latest research on medication use in pregnancy and breastfeeding. I have health issues and I found that so often doctors would say, well, you just shouldn't take anything . . . Then I would call the hotline and discover that the risks were incredibly small. From what I've read, yes, there is an increased risk of birth defects on SSRIs, but it is very small: "the overall risk of having a child affected by SSRI use was only 0.2%." And Zoloft has the lowest serum ratios found in umbilical cords of all the SSRIs. I would not take any benzos while pregnant or breastfeeding but an SSRI is something to discuss with your doctor. The biggest concern with SSRI usage is that babies exposed in the third trimester will experience discontinuation syndrome. Of course, I AM NOT A DOCTOR. I just didn't want you panicking over this when you have so much else on your plate. Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 If she's not keeping the baby then why does she need to stop the medication? I'm sorry Pink..this sucks. Link to post Share on other sites
MidnightBlue1980 Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 OMG. This is not okay I am in tears in my office. I should probably go home My friend got pregnant and did not know who the father was. She had him and I don't think either guy is in her life. Her son is a joy to her. I'm not saying it's not a big deal, but you are the one pregnant and should you keep it, it will be your baby. I am pro choice so it's not about that but don't make a decision out of embarrassment. If you knew how little people really cared, you would not worry half as much. This is about can you afford a child, care for one, do you want one? Men come and men go. Marriages break up. People die. Crap happens. This is about you and what you want now. Link to post Share on other sites
startingagain15 Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 Yup, a line is a line no matter how faint. I got pregnant with my last baby on the pill, I took the pill late one day and that's all it took. I take wellbutrin, but had to go off it for the pregnancy. They okayed zoloft for when I was breastfeeding, but not while I was pregnant. I just went without while pregnant. This is a train wreck, but I just can't look away. Link to post Share on other sites
waterwoman Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 Please everyone stop with the catastrophising! IF she is pregnant it is is incredibly unlikely there will be major problems from the antidepressants. This panic is NOT helping. Pink- please don't panic. Babies are tough little buggers and if a few prescription drugs always caused birth defects there'd a lot more damaged people. If heroin addicts can have healthy babies .... Just stay calm and see a doctor as soon as you can xx 3 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 If she's not keeping the baby then why does she need to stop the medication? I do not think she has had any time to decide what she is going to do yet, if she is pregnant. Also pregnant at 34 - this may be her only chance of a child - big decision - not to be taken in a hurry. Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 I do not think she has had any time to decide what she is going to do yet, if she is pregnant. Also pregnant at 34 - this may be her only chance of a child - big decision - not to be taken in a hurry. Oh I know, I was just worried that she was going to go cold turkey and end up depressed. Also Pink, my doctor told me that for the first 6 weeks the baby is not connected to your bloodstream so anything you've taken up til then shouldn't affect it. IF there is a baby that is. Link to post Share on other sites
Author PinkSunset Posted July 22, 2016 Author Share Posted July 22, 2016 Thanks everyone for your kind words and advice. I took another preg test and it said "Pregnant, 2-3". I've also started bleeding a little bit, like spotting. It's there when I wipe. I don't take Ativan often, only when I feel a lot of anxiety and it's been over a week since I took one. I will see what my doctor says about my Zoloft. If I decide I'm going to be a Mom, I won't take anything... Even if it won't harm the baby. If the test is accurate then it still doesn't help me to figure out who is the father. I guess in the end if I decide to keep it, it won't matter. I am financially stable, have a good job, own a house... I can do it alone. I just never wanted to. I wanted a family and a husband. I don't think my age will affect much, will it? A woman at my office had her first when she was 37. Link to post Share on other sites
ShatteredLady Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 All of my friends from my local 'Mom's Group' had their first baby in their late 30's & 2nd in their early 40's (myself included). 34 isn't old to have a baby. I hope you get whatever you want. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lobe Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 I just never wanted to. I wanted a family and a husband. I don't think my age will affect much, will it? A woman at my office had her first when she was 37. People are having babies well into their 40s, some medically assisted others without any help at all. If you're 2-3 weeks, then it's a British babe, and the testers are SO accurate these days I don't think there's a point in disputing it. That's enough of a discrepancy that you'd have a difficult time convincing Jamie it was his a normal pregnancy lasts up to 42 weeks and if you went "overdue" with this baby, you'd be 44 weeks. If you're still in touch with UK guy daily, maybe he's not going to disappear. I'd come and visit you across the pond! FWIW, faint traces of implantation bleeding is normal and frequently occurs right around 2-3 weeks, so until/unless you start bleeding right proper, I think it would be prudent to conduct yourself as if you are pregnant until and unless you have made a final decision about what to do with your pregnancy. This is a bit like walking away from a cliffhanger... How will I survive a week off LS without updates in Pink's storyline?!?! Big hugs to you girl. Link to post Share on other sites
noelle303 Posted July 22, 2016 Share Posted July 22, 2016 If the test is accurate then it still doesn't help me to figure out who is the father. I guess in the end if I decide to keep it, it won't matter. I am financially stable, have a good job, own a house... I can do it alone. I just never wanted to. I wanted a family and a husband. I don't think my age will affect much, will it? A woman at my office had her first when she was 37. That's understandable. However, life doesn't always work out the way we envision it and it's not necessarily a bad thing. My daughter is a child I had with an xMM at 21 and I was left all alone to raise her. It's been a tough journey, but I love our life. However, you're not me and you may truly want something different for yourself. That's ok. Think hard about what you want and don't allow yourself to become preoccupied with social norms - you're not too old to be a parent and you're also not too old to have an abortion and possibly have another child down the road with someone else. People of all ages make mistakes and start over. Spotting, especially when it's brown(ish) blood is very normal in early pregnancy. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PinkSunset Posted July 22, 2016 Author Share Posted July 22, 2016 People are having babies well into their 40s, some medically assisted others without any help at all. If you're 2-3 weeks, then it's a British babe, and the testers are SO accurate these days I don't think there's a point in disputing it. That's enough of a discrepancy that you'd have a difficult time convincing Jamie it was his a normal pregnancy lasts up to 42 weeks and if you went "overdue" with this baby, you'd be 44 weeks. If you're still in touch with UK guy daily, maybe he's not going to disappear. I'd come and visit you across the pond! FWIW, faint traces of implantation bleeding is normal and frequently occurs right around 2-3 weeks, so until/unless you start bleeding right proper, I think it would be prudent to conduct yourself as if you are pregnant until and unless you have made a final decision about what to do with your pregnancy. This is a bit like walking away from a cliffhanger... How will I survive a week off LS without updates in Pink's storyline?!?! Big hugs to you girl. Well, the last time I slept with Jamie was June 20th. It would be 4 weeks ago. I supposed if it's accurate than it is UK guy's baby. That's basically a week give or take that it could be wrong. Even if I do decide to tell him, which I probably will... He lives in England, he is a professional. What could he possibly do? We have been getting to know each other but we are both of the realization it's going to go no where. We had fun for a week, we enjoy each other... But I am in Canada and he is in England. He just got out of a relationship and so did I. It's a very complicated and messed up situation. He does have one son also, so the chances of him ever moving here are slim to none. If Jamie finds out I am pregnant he will assume it is his. I have to be the one to tear him apart and say it might not be. The thought of that hurts me beyond belief. We talked many times about starting a family together and buying a house, yearly vacations... I will feel terrible. Part of me wonders if I should just say it is his even if I don't know for sure. I could have Jamie and a family and everything I've hoped for in the last while... But where would my karma be then? Or I raise it on my own. Or I terminate and speak nothing of it to Jamie or UK guy. Could I live with myself? Also Lobe, LOL. I am sorry you will have to catch up on my story when you get back. Unfortunately for me it's my life Hope you enjoy your vacation. Link to post Share on other sites
Author PinkSunset Posted July 22, 2016 Author Share Posted July 22, 2016 That's understandable. However, life doesn't always work out the way we envision it and it's not necessarily a bad thing. My daughter is a child I had with an xMM at 21 and I was left all alone to raise her. It's been a tough journey, but I love our life. However, you're not me and you may truly want something different for yourself. That's ok. Think hard about what you want and don't allow yourself to become preoccupied with social norms - you're not too old to be a parent and you're also not too old to have an abortion and possibly have another child down the road with someone else. People of all ages make mistakes and start over. Spotting, especially when it's brown(ish) blood is very normal in early pregnancy. Does he have anything to do with your daughter? You are a strong woman being able to go through that. It gives me hope to know I am not alone in this at all. Link to post Share on other sites
noelle303 Posted July 23, 2016 Share Posted July 23, 2016 Does he have anything to do with your daughter? You are a strong woman being able to go through that. It gives me hope to know I am not alone in this at all. The first few years, no. However, he turned around and is currently regularly seeing her so it worked out fine with a lot of patience, work and compromise, People deal with all kinds of crazy things that happen in their life. It's all a matter of how you handle it. You're definitely not alone. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted July 23, 2016 Share Posted July 23, 2016 I'm sorry to hear about the news - it seems likely it may be UK's baby. It really shouldn't have bearing on Jamie as IF he really wants to be with you then he should understand...as he also has a child for you to accept if you two stay together. It's your personal choice on the baby front. If you want it then keep it! Jamie will understand IF he truly loves you. Take care of yourself knowing you may be pregnant now - make wise choices for your future. I wouldn't recommend lying about who the father may be - paternity tests are easy to do and reveal the truth. Link to post Share on other sites
gorf Posted July 23, 2016 Share Posted July 23, 2016 He's married. Stay out of his business. Link to post Share on other sites
GollumsNightmare Posted July 23, 2016 Share Posted July 23, 2016 Is UK guy married, too? Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted July 24, 2016 Share Posted July 24, 2016 You know Pink, if you wish to keep the baby - you could potentially cut communication with both men and raise the baby without either of them knowing. It's your body - and if you ultimately wanted a baby - then you'd have that baby. Decide what is best for you knowing it's possible that you may do the parenting on your own. Nothing wrong with that as long as you don't expect anything from either guy. If one is involved then that may be a bonus. But decide what works for you on your own. Link to post Share on other sites
noelle303 Posted July 24, 2016 Share Posted July 24, 2016 You know Pink, if you wish to keep the baby - you could potentially cut communication with both men and raise the baby without either of them knowing. It's your body - and if you ultimately wanted a baby - then you'd have that baby. Decide what is best for you knowing it's possible that you may do the parenting on your own. Nothing wrong with that as long as you don't expect anything from either guy. If one is involved then that may be a bonus. But decide what works for you on your own. This is incredibly unethical and plain wrong. A man has every right to know if he fathered a child and a child has every right to know where they come from. Both from a medical and emotional standpoint. Just because we as women have this privilage to carry children and make decisions about our bodies, does not mean we get to act so selfishly. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted July 24, 2016 Share Posted July 24, 2016 This is incredibly unethical and plain wrong. A man has every right to know if he fathered a child and a child has every right to know where they come from. Both from a medical and emotional standpoint. Just because we as women have this privilage to carry children and make decisions about our bodies, does not mean we get to act so selfishly. I disagree - mainly because she doesn't yet know who the father may be. Selfish would be leading either one of them to believe it is theirs when she isn't positive of who the father is. Until a paternity test is done (if ever) - there isn't reason to have them "think" they are the father. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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