Changing in a marriage

[wmacbride]

If you are a married person, have you changed over the course of your marriage?

 

I so, in what way?

 

I met my spouse about 22 years ago, and have been married close to 20 years now. When I look back, it seems like such a long tome ago, and we were both so young and idealistic. We both had a vision of what our lives together woudl be like.

 

 

Due to a lot of reasons, things didn't turn out that way, but the adversities we have been through brought us closer together. We were able to grow with one another. Now, we are best friends,and romantic with one another as well.

 

I don't know if t was luck or something else, but we are happy and things are getting better all the time.

[Mrs. John Adams]

We both certainly have changed. I was 16 and he was 18 when we met at church. We married 8 months later.

He was the only boy i ever dated.

 

We immediately moved thousands of miles away from our families....he was in the military...so we only had each other to cling to.

 

I was a very naive young lady.....sadly...as life experiences have come our way....I am no longer young...I am no longer naive.

 

I can see that we have grown toward each other in these past 44 years....even though we have experienced much heart ache.

 

We are very different people than we were and I think we are better than ever.

We plan to retire in 2017....and are looking forward to spending even more time together.

[wmacbride]

We both certainly have changed. I was 16 and he was 18 when we met at church. We married 8 months later.

He was the only boy i ever dated.

 

We immediately moved thousands of miles away from our families....he was in the military...so we only had each other to cling to.

 

I was a very naive young lady.....sadly...as life experiences have come our way....I am no longer young...I am no longer naive.

 

I can see that we have grown toward each other in these past 44 years....even though we have experienced much heart ache.

 

We are very different people than we were and I think we are better than ever.

We plan to retire in 2017....and are looking forward to spending even more time together.

 

I guess I just find it odd that some people are surprised when spouses change over the course of a marriage. Everyone is constantly growing and changing, so why would a husband or wife be any different.

 

I guess the key is being able to adapt to those changes.

 

So much can happen, both good and bad, and that molds a person.

 

Best wishes for your retirement, btw. May it be a long and happy ne for you both

[Phoenician]

we married 18 years back ;

 

Over the years we both changed of course ,but the degree of change in me is much more intense ; I tried a lot of things ; sometimes changing dramatically toward what I believe a better change in myself ;

what amaze me is that I never saw a real change in my wife ; the thing that frankly makes me depressed ...

 

 

my advise to you is that to take every benefit from every benifit you can do ; let me give an example , few years back I would feel resentfull if I initiate in vain ; nowadays , I might initiate more often ; and care less about what i used to call rejection ; it is simple , I initiate , she plays the role of sleeping beauty , I go out and have fun with my friends ; the next night she will brush her teeth twice before sleeping , especially when she knows from me that I had a nice time !

[brothers343]

Im a firm believer that your best friend should be your partner in life. That has never changed in my 13 year marriege.

[Mrs. John Adams]

Im a firm believer that your best friend should be your partner in life. That has never changed in my 13 year marriege.

 

I agree with this...

 

My husband is indeed my best friend... I would be so lost without him.

 

He is my encourager, my rock, and has proven to have my back even when I do not deserve it.

 

I am glad your marriages are much like mine....

 

Nothing makes me happier than to see two people in love and committed to each other no matter what.

 

I love seeing love in others faces... It is indeed what makes the world go round.

 

Thank you for sharing your love

[understand50]

45 years ago we married. I was 19 she 21. We grew up together, and we both have changed over the years, some good, some bad. I am struck that there was never a time when we both did not have to work at our marriage and not take each other for granted. We both moved to different interests, and hobbies, not always the same for each. On the whole, we are not the young couple that married, but have matured together.

 

The thing that has stayed the same is that we like to be with each other and have fun together. We have also faced the world together. We will also face the end together. Both of us have been the consistent fact for each other. No matter what life has brought, we have faced it together.

 

My two cents.......

[Mrs. John Adams]

45 years ago we married. I was 19 she 21. We grew up together, and we both have changed over the years, some good, some bad. I am struck that there was never a time when we both did not have to work at our marriage and not take each other for granted. We both moved to different interests, and hobbies, not always the same for each. On the whole, we are not the young couple that married, but have matured together.

 

The thing that has stayed the same is that we like to be with each other and have fun together. We have also faced the world together. We will also face the end together. Both of us have been the consistent fact for each other. No matter what life has brought, we have faced it together.

 

My two cents.......

 

Understand50... I did not realize you are old like me! Lol

 

You and your wife have also overcome much dear friend! Isn't it so worth it!

[mikeylo]

I am almost bald now ! Had a head full of hair when I got married ! Her hair have thinned a lot !

People change everyday , married or not.

[wmacbride]

45 years ago we married. I was 19 she 21. We grew up together, and we both have changed over the years, some good, some bad. I am struck that there was never a time when we both did not have to work at our marriage and not take each other for granted. We both moved to different interests, and hobbies, not always the same for each. On the whole, we are not the young couple that married, but have matured together.

 

The thing that has stayed the same is that we like to be with each other and have fun together. We have also faced the world together. We will also face the end together. Both of us have been the consistent fact for each other. No matter what life has brought, we have faced it together.

 

My two cents.......

 

Thanks for sharing

 

Your post about being married 45 years makes me feel like a spring chicken:laugh:

 

It is really wonderful to be best friends. We've also been very fortunate to expeirnce a lot of wonderful things together, both simple and everyday things and ones that are much more "spectacular"- for lack of a better word.

[WaitingForBardot]

Been married over 30 years now. In many ways we are completely different than when we first met, but in many others we are almost exactly the same.

[cocorico]

If you are a married person, have you changed over the course of your marriage?

 

I so, in what way?

 

In some ways, not at all. In other ways, hugely.

 

I've learned to trust, to love, to compromise. I've loosened my grip on my fierce independence, allowing myself to accept help (occasionally) and I've learned to share my space. I've learned to appreciate family, and I've learned to adapt to strange customs and odd culture.

 

Essentially, I'm still myself. I still enjoy the same things, have the same values, invest my time, energy and attention in similar ways and although my edges might have softened, my core is as steely as ever.

[blackcat777]

My boyfriend and I have changed so much in the past few years, it's ridiculous! And awesome.

 

He always tells me he wants to grow with me... I think that's what it's all about.

 

My favorite blogger always says, "You're either growing or you're dying."