I kissed my boyfriends cousin

[burgily]

Good Morning ,

So first and foremost , i would like to break it down piece by piece to get the most accurate responses / advice..

 

I am 23 years old and live with my boyfriend whom I have a 3 year old son with. In everyone’s eyes i am considered boring , and all about my mommy life.. My boyfriend goes out with his coworkers and has a great time and i dont , at all.

 

Anywho lately I have been getting close with his Cousin a girl named Linda.. Linda is a single mom , about my age with a son about my sons age as well..We were never really that close up till recently were we all started hanging out more as a family and i started letting loose a little bit and having fun with my boyfriends family…

 

So last night Linda and i went out for what was suppose to be a few drinks… then we had a few more , than more , during the night ..my boyfriend stayed home babysitting our son and his nephew ( linda’s son )

 

Linda and i both were pretty wasted and she brought her chair from across the table to sit next to me .. we were just getting all girl womenly empowered and how we wished we would have been better friends before etc… THEN we start complementing each other physically , and I kissed her just a peck..Then another one…

 

She then says please dont tell my cousin he will kill me and wont ever let us hang out again blah blah all in a laughing matter..

 

Our Uber came to pick us up, and Out of nowhere we began to make out , like with tongue , and then her hands start touching me and feeling on me , then we stop, and then when we get home as were walking in the driveway shes like dont tell him and pulls me in next to my car and starts making out and feeling on me again.. We had to stop.. we went inside the house and fell asleep..

 

This morning , i felt like i had to tell my boyfriend.. It felt wrong to keep it from him , and i didnt want him to find out through anyone .. Maybe i should have told him person but i texted him and i told him i needed to tell him something.

 

I told him , Linda and i kinda kissed yesterday… we were both super drunk and just all getting emotional.its nothing like that , were not dating or having and affair or anything of that nature..

 

His response: Man **** You

 

I tried telling him once again .

His response: Just **** off..

 

My boyfriend and i havent been good these past few weeks, and i just dont want something like this, to destory our relationship..

 

Please, any thoughts , advice.. I NEED IT.

[stillafool]

Oh my goodness. I give you credit for telling him although I'm not quite sure I would have. Did you enjoy it and would you want to do it again? Get ready for family drama when he cusses out Linda.

[deadparrot]

Admitting you cheated wasn't the easiest thing in the world to do, I'm sure, so kudos to you for that at least.

 

That said...you cheated, and for some people that's a dealbreaker. The ball is now in your BF's court as to whether he wants to continue the relationship or not. I'd say you get one shot to say your piece--whether that's by text, email, voicemail, phone call, in person, etc. Apologize profusely, let him know you want to work on your relationship, and that you want to set up a time to meet and through things face to face. After that, though, I would step back and let him get in touch with you. He's likely going to need some time to process things, and bombarding him with communication isn't going to help.

[NTV]

While you and your boyfriend aren't married, you pretty much could be. Kid, living together, knowing each other's family, etc.

 

 

So I think you should look into the 'what every wayward should know' thread. Because this is going to be your best bet at recovering the relationship--to treat it like he's your betrayed husband. All the emotions are the same...

 

 

so give him transparency, honesty, etc.

 

 

And good job telling him! That is awesome of you... it takes a lot of courage, and you know you have that. It says great things about your character.

[MrBojangles]

After reading your first thread started here on LS last year:

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/532760-i-want-save-my-relationship#post6374689

 

It sounds to me like you two really need to end this toxic relationship. Seems that the love and respect is long gone, and only drama remains. You admitted in your first thread that you cheated on him and broke up for a year. How did you think he'd react to being told you made out with his female cousin?

 

Sorry to say, but given what you've written about your and his past, it just seems too toxic to salvage.

[Try]

THEN we start complementing each other physically , and I kissed her just a peck..Then another one...

Our Uber came to pick us up, and Out of nowhere we began to make out , like with tongue , and then her hands start touching me and feeling on me , then we stop, and then when we get home as were walking in the driveway shes like dont tell him and pulls me in next to my car and starts making out and feeling on me again.

It does not matter if the other person that you cheated with is male or female, when in an exclusive relationship what you did was cheating plain and simple. Worse yet, it was with one of his family members that will forever make it difficult to ever fully get away from that person so that he can move on. Even worse, you made the first move so the family will put most of the blame on you the non-blood family member.

 

i just dont want something like this, to destory our relationship.

You cheated on him with a member of his own family, and yet you refer to this as "just dont want something like this" as if it is no big deal. You just do not get it. Cheating is a big deal. You better start showing big time remorse, and you need to start letting him know that you understand what a big deal this is, if you want any chance to save this relationship.

[stillafool]

After reading your first thread started here on LS last year:

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/532760-i-want-save-my-relationship#post6374689

 

It sounds to me like you two really need to end this toxic relationship. Seems that the love and respect is long gone, and only drama remains. You admitted in your first thread that you cheated on him and broke up for a year. How did you think he'd react to being told you made out with his female cousin?

 

Sorry to say, but given what you've written about your and his past, it just seems too toxic to salvage.

 

If the above is true and this is your second time cheating, just end it already.

[bluefeather]

I think it was good of you to be honest... but you need to leave him alone. what you did was probably hurtful on more than one level, since it was his family. let him go because you are hurting him.