why didn the say goodbye??? we werent even fighting...

[Chewybrwn]

will someone please knock me back into reality and tell me the truth about what think about this situation???

 

when i started my job last august, I met a guy who i shared a lot of common interests with. we were in the same department of work, so when we worked most of the time, it was together. we even had the same major at the same school. I had even found out that in the past we had some of the same classes without even knowing each other existed. with time, i had become even more attracted to him, because his personality blew me away. so finally we exhanged numbers and promised to do something outside of work. the first time we hung out i went to his place, we talked, watched a movie and cuddled. i was so happy because i assumed that it was the beginning of something. the next day at work, it was kind of awkward. but within a few days we stared becoming a little more comfortable with each other. by then, i was sure that we had feelings for each other. so then a few weeks later he came over to my place. we talked, watched a movie, talked some more, then had sex. it was really unexpected. that same night before he left, he asked if things were going to be awkward. and i told him, only if we make it that way.

 

 

the next day he called me and told me that it was all a mistake. that he wasnt ready for another relationship and that we should be friends. i was immediately confused and upset, but thought i should just respect his wishes, because it takes two to make a relationship work. but my feelings for him didnt just dissappear. then a few weeks later he told me he was moving back to his hometown. i couldnt beleive it. i asked everyone if they knew what he was talking about, and know one did. I was the first person he had told. he was leaving in about 2 months fom then. those 2 months were so weird. he didnt want a relationship, but called me to know who i was with and what i was doing. he had started becoming protective, but didnt want the wole "boyfriend" resposibilty. he had gotten jea;ous about every guy he didnt kow i'd interact with. he was like the boyfriend that i never had or something.

 

eventually the time had come for him to go back. we hadnt gotten into any fights or arguments, in fact, although i was bummed he was leaving i thought we'd leave each other on a good note. but thats when it just got really weird. the very last week he was here, he didnt talk to me, acknowledge me or ever look me in the eye. he would blatanly ignore me, while he was completely normal and socialble with everyone else. i even bought him star wars premeire tickets(which is a huge deal to me) as kind of a going away present. and to top it off, he didnt even say goodbye. which bugs me the most.

 

i dont know if this is my fault of what. but im confused. the same sincere guy who would do just about anything for me, had kind of ended up being the biggest jerk in the end. and i have not a clue why. can anyone deciper this behavior, because i unfortunately cant get over him or this situation which has no closure whatsoever.

 

[Merin]

Well sounds to me that while this Guy liked you, he really wasn't all about a relationship period.

After the 2 of you were intimate, he had regret and cut off the "relationship" and honestly IMO 2 dates don't count as a relationship.. just 2 dates..

 

I think he knew you liked him and were far more into him then he was into you.. and for this reason I think he disappeared on you so to speak to avoid any possible tears or promises of staying in touch he may have been looking for on your end.. sometimes emotions like this are just more than people want or can deal with so they choose to deal with them the best way they know how.. to avoid them.

 

Sorry you got your feelings hurt....

[ImaManDammit]

Was there any expectation from you of a relationship after sex?

 

He may have not seen it that way.

 

I agree with Merin that his avoidance was probabaly so that he wouldn't have to deal with alot of emotions.

[J dub]

Yep - classic story of girl thinking that a relationship had developed and had sex to "strengthen" the idea. It didnt work, usually it doesnt.

 

I am sorry he played you like this sounds like you liked him and he liked you, but didnt want to pursue you so he blew you off. He's a jerk --