What do you think were his motives? Did I blow things out of proportion like he said?

[kendahke]

I met him at a gathering at a friend's place. After that he pursued me incessantly even though I was living in a different city and could only see him once a week while traveling for my job. He was extremely romantic and seemed very into me, constantly showering me with compliments. He told me that I am his dream woman and that there is nothing he wants more than to spend time with me.

 

After the initial two weeks, he started being distant at times and blowing hot and cold. I also saw him less frequently as I was no longer traveling. He told me he is going through financial troubles and does not have money to pay his bill so his phone would be off for days.

 

Finally I got a job offer in his city and decided to relocate there. Last week I went to visit him. He told me that he wants to move in with me and was super romantic and sweet telling me that I am the most awesome woman he's ever been with. While he was at work, I stumbled onto another woman's clothing. Decided to approach him who confessed to seeing another woman simultaneously, who also lives in a different city. Did not even care to apologize as he thought we were not mutually exclusive! Accused me for blowing things out of proportion and invading his privacy. Also told me that he has two daughters which he had not cared to tell me about during all these months!

 

I decided to contact the other girl who had no clue who he had lied to about me. Also discovered that he had told me a bunch of other lies including his job and apartment. Send him a few angry texts, he got super mad and blocked me on his phone... Also found out later that he had been telling the other girl that I was just an ONS and that she's the one he wants to be with.

 

I feel very confused, angry and saddened by all of this... What were his intentions from the start? How should I have handled this situation? Did I really blow things out of proportion?

 

I hope you haven't let him move in with you.

 

Why are you taking his word for how he thinks you reacted to finding out the truth? He set out on a lie with you. How he feels about you uncovering his lie is the least of this. The fact is: he lied and he didn't even have to.

 

And why are you trying to indict yourself here? Is it because you want to be with him?

[kendahke]

Just a quick update on this crazy drama! It gets more and more interesting proving that he is a spineless scumbag...

 

After three weeks of NC, the OW e-mails me asking me if I could fwd her any text messages or emails that could show that we were in a relationship as he has been in constant denial, simply telling her that we had sex a couple of times.

 

So I recover and send her my messaging history which includes texts in which he is referring to me as "love" and expressing how much he likes me and misses me.

 

Later on that day, I receive an e-mail from the ass-h*le addressed to both me and the OW, littered with insults towards me, expressing his love for her and telling her that our relationship was purely based on sex and that I made this ludicrous story up out of spite and misery! How f*@!ing delusional, not to mention a pathological liar!!!

 

Then I respond to his email (cc'ing her) telling him exactly all the things he had told me and exposing his lies! He still keeps denying, sending me additional emails of insults and cc'ing her. To my last e-mail, I attached our whole e-mailing and chat history which made him shut up!!!

 

What a tool!!! He just dug himself into a whole that he could not get out of!!

 

I really really hope that I do not hear from him again...

 

Block him and be done with their sick drama.