Reconciliations

[justagrl07]

They do happen. Happened to me. They can happen to you. Don't lose hope and think they never loved you. Sometimes they just need space and time. The green grass syndrome is real. We all go through a time in our lives where we feel lost and blame our confusion on every aspect of our lives, including relationships. Don't doubt their love for you. I am speaking from personal experience. I know what it feels like: the heartache, sleepless nights, negative thoughts, and replaying the same sad love song-- I get it! But trust that what's meant for you, will be yours. Don't let anyone tell you they will never come back because they can and most likely if you were a good partner, they will. Now, don't just sit at home on a Saturday night and wait for their call, text, or face to show up at your door step. Go out rebuild yourself, your relationship with friends and family, and your hobbies that you used to love to do but may have stopped or don't do as much because you were in a relationship. It is the minute you put all your energy into you that they show back up into your life. Don't wait. But also don't think they never loved you because they did and most likely still do! Let them have their space and time. Don't blow up their phone and show up at their house or job uninvited. Don't do anything crazy. They broke up with you so be strong and have the attitude like you are a badass and just live a great life! Self help books are amazing -- so instead of lying in bed at night listening to James Bay's When We Were On Fire go out and buy yourself a book that will help you to be strong and grow as a person!

[positivemale]

They do happen. Happened to me. They can happen to you. Don't lose hope and think they never loved you. Sometimes they just need space and time. The green grass syndrome is real. We all go through a time in our lives where we feel lost and blame our confusion on every aspect of our lives, including relationships. Don't doubt their love for you. I am speaking from personal experience. I know what it feels like: the heartache, sleepless nights, negative thoughts, and replaying the same sad love song-- I get it! But trust that what's meant for you, will be yours. Don't let anyone tell you they will never come back because they can and most likely if you were a good partner, they will. Now, don't just sit at home on a Saturday night and wait for their call, text, or face to show up at your door step. Go out rebuild yourself, your relationship with friends and family, and your hobbies that you used to love to do but may have stopped or don't do as much because you were in a relationship. It is the minute you put all your energy into you that they show back up into your life. Don't wait. But also don't think they never loved you because they did and most likely still do! Let them have their space and time. Don't blow up their phone and show up at their house or job uninvited. Don't do anything crazy. They broke up with you so be strong and have the attitude like you are a badass and just live a great life! Self help books are amazing -- so instead of lying in bed at night listening to James Bay's When We Were On Fire go out and buy yourself a book that will help you to be strong and grow as a person!

 

Give us the full story please

[justagrl07]

Give us the full story please

 

We dated for 4 years. I was 19 and he was 20 when we started dating. I was his first real serious relationship. We broke up 4 years later after graduating college. He felt that I was all he knew, wasn't sure if I was "the one", he felt the honeymoon phase had died off and thought it was never supposed to- just all in all many small little things that are all signs of gigs. I was of course devastated and blindsided and came on this site to try and figure out what had happened and find any hope I could. One day, I just closed my account and focused on me. I traveled a lot, worked hard- got a promotion, spent more time with family and friends, read self help books and got back into music and photography. I missed him deeply. There was never a day I didn't think about him or us, BUT I was okay without him. With time I healed and I was able to rebuild myself. I dated a little. I think it's good to get your feet wet and get back in the dating scene. But it wasn't my priority. So almost a whole year goes by and I had just came back from traveling overseas and he messaged me to get together and catch up. We were both at really good places in our lives professionally and emotionally. We took things very slow. We didn't rush into anything. When we first started dating we were each others worlds, but we realized that,that wasn't healthy. We lost our individuality and that can be a number one cause of why many relationships fail. This time around is much better because we have each other but also ourselves and our own independent lives apart from each other. Neither of us had another gf/bf while we were apart. We both dated, but we both knew that it wasn't the end of our story. Sometimes all people need is space and time and the best thing to do is give that to them.

[positivemale]

We dated for 4 years. I was 19 and he was 20 when we started dating. I was his first real serious relationship. We broke up 4 years later after graduating college. He felt that I was all he knew, wasn't sure if I was "the one", he felt the honeymoon phase had died off and thought it was never supposed to- just all in all many small little things that are all signs of gigs. I was of course devastated and blindsided and came on this site to try and figure out what had happened and find any hope I could. One day, I just closed my account and focused on me. I traveled a lot, worked hard- got a promotion, spent more time with family and friends, read self help books and got back into music and photography. I missed him deeply. There was never a day I didn't think about him or us, BUT I was okay without him. With time I healed and I was able to rebuild myself. I dated a little. I think it's good to get your feet wet and get back in the dating scene. But it wasn't my priority. So almost a whole year goes by and I had just came back from traveling overseas and he messaged me to get together and catch up. We were both at really good places in our lives professionally and emotionally. We took things very slow. We didn't rush into anything. When we first started dating we were each others worlds, but we realized that,that wasn't healthy. We lost our individuality and that can be a number one cause of why many relationships fail. This time around is much better because we have each other but also ourselves and our own independent lives apart from each other. Neither of us had another gf/bf while we were apart. We both dated, but we both knew that it wasn't the end of our story. Sometimes all people need is space and time and the best thing to do is give that to them.

 

We're you guys in no contact during the year? How often did you guys talk?

[justagrl07]

We're you guys in no contact during the year? How often did you guys talk?

 

We were in no contact for maybe 5 months and the rest was little contact. He wished me a happy birthday, happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, and happy New Year, but that was the extent of it. We saw each other about 4 times during the breakup- 2 times at mutual friends birthday celebrations and 2 times one on one. The 2 times one on one were at the end of our breakup and we just talked about what was new in our lives (we didn't mention the breakup, we didn't kiss or be intimate in any way. It was like friends hanging out). 3 months after our last one on one hangout we got back together.