lightning551 Posted May 22, 2016 Share Posted May 22, 2016 This is more of an etiquette question but when do you stop messaging other women? I found a girl on one of the sites who seems like a good match and after sending some messages back and forth we've started texting. She says she's looking for friends first but said she would like to meet me. I asked her on a date and she agreed but it won't be until next month. I haven't meet her yet so I don't know if things would work out or not it just seems like so far she seems like a good match for me. So do you continue to message other women or wait and see how it goes? Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted May 23, 2016 Share Posted May 23, 2016 This is more of an etiquette question but when do you stop messaging other women? I found a girl on one of the sites who seems like a good match and after sending some messages back and forth we've started texting. She says she's looking for friends first but said she would like to meet me. I asked her on a date and she agreed but it won't be until next month. I haven't meet her yet so I don't know if things would work out or not it just seems like so far she seems like a good match for me. So do you continue to message other women or wait and see how it goes? The notion that you suddenly owe something to someone you've never met before just because you exchanged phone numbers is extreme. If once you meet up, you hit it off and and decide to take it further, then that might be the time to consider quit getting off OLD. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 23, 2016 Share Posted May 23, 2016 It's a personal preference. If you & this person agree that you will stop doing OLD & close your accounts you definitely stop then. I would not stop until after I met somebody in person & went on a few dates with them. Your desire to stop now, before having even met just because you exchanged numbers is waaayyy too soon. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
central Posted May 23, 2016 Share Posted May 23, 2016 I'd keep messaging - and meeting - other women until I found someone with whom I wanted to be exclusive, and they wanted the same. You can't even be sure you'll like someone enough (and vice versa!) to keep dating until you've met in person, so limiting your opportunities before that point is counterproductive. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
BrainMangler Posted May 27, 2016 Share Posted May 27, 2016 If she mentions something then block her and say you deleted the app or online dating profile and continue to message others as backups. Tinder is better for this because it will be harder for her to trace your profile if you block her (after getting her phone number of course). Honestly I would just leave them up though so that she can see that you still have the possibility of contacting (and being contact by) other women. It will put some pressure on her to try lock you down. Bonus points if this is tinder because you can spoof your location to better parts of the world like Ukraine, Czech Republic, etc.. You can literally have more matches than her and while shes with you she'll see your phone constantly lighting up with tinder matches. It may intrigue her (or may backfire depending on the girl). A bit of a underhanded tactic but it's worked for me. Link to post Share on other sites
Phoenician Posted May 27, 2016 Share Posted May 27, 2016 As long as there are no vows / commitment. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted May 27, 2016 Share Posted May 27, 2016 When you're invited by her folks to Sunday dinner - and you're looking forward to it. I think that's high time to wipe the 'phone. Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted May 29, 2016 Share Posted May 29, 2016 If your player you'll keep going to you reach someone that won't say or do this: LETS TAKE EVERYTHING VERY SLOWLY If you do then move on to the next. Sounds like the one you have might be involved with someone else or just about breaking up with someone else. They won't tell you the truth until you deep it out of them. Link to post Share on other sites
JuneJulySeptember Posted May 30, 2016 Share Posted May 30, 2016 This is more of an etiquette question but when do you stop messaging other women? I found a girl on one of the sites who seems like a good match and after sending some messages back and forth we've started texting. She says she's looking for friends first but said she would like to meet me. I asked her on a date and she agreed but it won't be until next month. I haven't meet her yet so I don't know if things would work out or not it just seems like so far she seems like a good match for me. So do you continue to message other women or wait and see how it goes? Wow, you are a REALLY nice dude. You haven't even met this woman yet and you're ready to look away from other women? Kudos to you man. Personally, I stopped when I had a couple of women that I was physically going out on dates with. The whole OLD process was frustrating for me, and I didn't want to be on it any more than necessary. Link to post Share on other sites
bluestealth Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 This is more of an etiquette question but when do you stop messaging other women? I found a girl on one of the sites who seems like a good match and after sending some messages back and forth we've started texting. She says she's looking for friends first but said she would like to meet me. I asked her on a date and she agreed but it won't be until next month. I haven't meet her yet so I don't know if things would work out or not it just seems like so far she seems like a good match for me. So do you continue to message other women or wait and see how it goes? Definitely keep messaging other women and setting up additional dates. Given the flaky nature of people on OLD, there's always a chance you'll never actually meet. She may cancel last minute and then all of that time waiting until next month would've been wasted. I know it's a bit much, but I've actually got three dates scheduled this week! Also, I don't care for when a woman says she's looking for friends first. I'd ignore that and treat her like any other woman you'd date. In other words, don't hold back escalating things physically just because she said that. Link to post Share on other sites
MargoJones Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 It's refreshing to hear you are so loyal! Nice to know there are men out there like that, but when it comes to online dating, you aren't dating anyone until you meet in person. Even then, if she said she wants to start as friends you aren't dating until you firmly establish that you are a couple. Keep in mind that you will be more attractive to her if you don't place all of your expectations on her. Online dating is a numbers game because you have to meet quite a few more people online to know who will be a good GF or BF than you do when you meet people in person. So, put yourself out there! Have fun and try not to take it too seriously because most of them fizzle out and you'll want to have several people you can meet in person if you're really looking for a relationship. That's doesn't make you a player, it just makes you a realistic person. Good luck! You sound like such a great guy. I hope you find somebody great. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
angel.eyes Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 After a good first date, and you've confirmed the details of the second date. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lightning551 Posted June 12, 2016 Author Share Posted June 12, 2016 Thanks everyone. And sorry I didn't get back sooner. I checked the replies but didn't have time to respond and then forgot. I just wasn't sure what was considered appropriate and not. I've used it a little before but I'm still new to the whole online dating thing. Link to post Share on other sites
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