Shanex Posted May 25, 2016 Share Posted May 25, 2016 My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for about 8 months now and I've been troubled by this for a while now; Whenever I tell him how I feel or when I'm upset, he doesn't try to help me, he just gets mad or moody himself because of me which obviously makes me feel worse. Also, when I'm not happy about something and try to tell him about it, he gets mad and over exaggerates everything, for example, I asked him not to do something so much, once in a while is ok... And then he would proceed to saying how he would never ever do it again (sarcastically of course) and speaks about it as if it's my fault for feeling this way. Another thing that upset me was when he asked about what I'm scared of, I said 'cats, flying and needles'.. I know they're very illogical I guess but my boyfriend calls me dumb and illogical all the time for it. ^^This... He is a very sweet guy and I do love him a lot but these things makes me feel like I am dumb and not good enough. Clearly don't match with this^^ I don't even know how you could keep this guy around for eight months. What's the next phase ? Physical abuse? To use the famous acronym: DTMFA 2 Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted May 25, 2016 Share Posted May 25, 2016 I think it's unwarranted to assume he is at fault without knowing the situation. Huh? Did you miss this: Whenever I tell him how I feel or when I'm upset, he doesn't try to help me, he just gets mad or moody himself because of me which obviously makes me feel worse. Also, when I'm not happy about something and try to tell him about it, he gets mad and over exaggerates everything, for example, I asked him not to do something so much, once in a while is ok... And then he would proceed to saying how he would never ever do it again (sarcastically of course) and speaks about it as if it's my fault for feeling this way. THAT is the situation. Those are the details. Combined with calling her dumb and illogical for being afraid of cats.... I would say HE is being illogical for feeling that way, not her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted May 26, 2016 Share Posted May 26, 2016 Yeah, sweet ppl don't call their partners dumb and illogical. But what if they are doing something dumb and illogical? It is perfectly OK to call their actions dumb and illogical if that is an accurate description. But it is not OK to call the person dumb and illogical. You can say "throwing that money down the drain was dumb and illogical" but it's not OK to say "you're dumb and illogical for throwing that money down the drain". See the difference? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted May 26, 2016 Share Posted May 26, 2016 I FORGOT TO ADD; I am moving away in August.. I'm moving to the UK, we both currently live in Tenerife (same time zone and only four and half hours away by plane etc) so not as bad as other LDR however with this problem, we argue enough as it is! So ditch him so when you get to the UK you are ready to go out and meet all those gorgeous British Gents! Simples! Oh and just to warn you, while many British guys are wonderful we still have the odd douche bag so don't accept this behaviour from anyone... Link to post Share on other sites
greenly24 Posted May 26, 2016 Share Posted May 26, 2016 You sound like a really sweet girl, and I don't think you should have to put up with someone who makes you feel dumb or inferior. Nobody deserves that. I know you said he is a sweet guy, but it sounds like this is kind of taking an emotional toll on you, which is not good. And the fact that he is unresponsive to you telling him that certain things hurt your feelings is not good either. I know that you deserve better. Link to post Share on other sites
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