na49 Posted June 6, 2016 Share Posted June 6, 2016 My cat was 15 years old, and had to be put down today. Well, he didn't have to, but my parents decided it was what's best for him. He could barely walk or go to the bathroom. He apparently had kidney problems. I am almost 22 years old, so I grew up with this cat. The fact that he's gone feels so traumatic to me. I guess I just want to know that things are going to be okay. I know there's no way to speed up the grieving process, but I haven't eaten all day. I don't want to go to work or do anything. I hate walking around the house and not seeing his food/water bowl or the blankets he'd lay on. I also feel guilty for not going to the vet with my parents. I laid on the floor with him a few hours before they took him in, but should I have gone with them? I didn't think I could handle being in the same room as him as he was being put down. This really is a different type of grief I've never dealt with before. Link to post Share on other sites
bathtub-row Posted June 7, 2016 Share Posted June 7, 2016 Aw. It's a very, very sad thing to lose a pet. They're very much a part of the family, sometimes more than we realize. I'm really sorry you're going through this and dealing with such a big loss. Maybe it will help to remember that your kitty was very ill and the quality of his life was much deminished. He's also no longer in any pain. Hopefully that will soothe your pain a little. You and your parents gave him a long and wonderful life. You did fine and kitty knew he was dearly loved by you. Hugs. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Buddhist Posted June 7, 2016 Share Posted June 7, 2016 Your cat understood that you were saying goodbye before he left, don't feel guilty about that. Nothing can really soothe this wound, it's a gaping hole that will be with you for some time. Somewhere in the grieving process though you will sense his presence again. Maybe you'll wake up in the middle of the night and thought you felt him jump onto the bed, or remember his warmth next to you. I've lost many pets so far and without fail they come back to me this way during my periods of grief. It's their spirit helping you to let go. But this is too soon, too raw for you. Just be in whatever mood you are in. It's normal. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
seamos Posted June 7, 2016 Share Posted June 7, 2016 I'm sorry you're going thru this. I know how it feels to lose an animal so close to you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted June 7, 2016 Share Posted June 7, 2016 (edited) My sympathies and, yeah, eventually, things will be OK. I'm coming up on three months next week and it's getting better, however each time I hit the road, there's a big hole since my cat was an excellent travel buddy and kept me company on 10-12 hour drives over the last year or so. IME, having lost pets at a young age, it seemed like things bounced back more quickly. I think some of that is the excitement of youth and so much stuff going on and also, for most folks, they don't have a lot of loved ones (human kind) dying until they get older. I've noticed, since losing family and friends over the last 5-6 years, that losing two feline buddies has been pretty hard, a lot harder than I remember in my youth. Anyway, yeah, it'll suck for awhile and should level out. Best wishes! Edited June 7, 2016 by carhill Suck, not such 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ChocolateRain Posted June 7, 2016 Share Posted June 7, 2016 My cat was 15 years old, and had to be put down today. Well, he didn't have to, but my parents decided it was what's best for him. He could barely walk or go to the bathroom. He apparently had kidney problems. I am almost 22 years old, so I grew up with this cat. The fact that he's gone feels so traumatic to me. I guess I just want to know that things are going to be okay. I know there's no way to speed up the grieving process, but I haven't eaten all day. I don't want to go to work or do anything. I hate walking around the house and not seeing his food/water bowl or the blankets he'd lay on. I also feel guilty for not going to the vet with my parents. I laid on the floor with him a few hours before they took him in, but should I have gone with them? I didn't think I could handle being in the same room as him as he was being put down. This really is a different type of grief I've never dealt with before. i can feel your pain i go through the same right now ... over the years i have learned to let go but humans feel emotions ... in my heart i want to believe that they are still around somehow maybe not in the same realm .... take time to grieve and do not feel guilty .... my thoughts are with you *hugs* Link to post Share on other sites
marioncrane Posted June 8, 2016 Share Posted June 8, 2016 I'm very sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is awful - they are such a part of our lives. You can only do what others have already said, that is, think about and grieve your cat, remember what you love and take it easy on yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Clep Posted June 18, 2016 Share Posted June 18, 2016 We recently lost my hubby's cat. She was the only cat he ever loved and she was put down at the vet without our consent. Not being there with her, being able to make the decision and feeling like we failed her was our issue. We would not have put her down and went another route had they communicated the issue with us. Guilt was our issue. The thing is that the guilt did nothing to aid us at all. I decided to honor Squeak with how I live. I pictured Squeak looking at us and our sorrow, wishing we were still the happy people she loved. We gave her the best life we could. She was loved and valued and she knew it. I focus on the positive and leave the rest I can't change out of my life. It does me no good now. Link to post Share on other sites
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