Would do anything for second chance with first love

[Gemini_jo]

What had these words been?

 

Awful words. I told her that I wanted to watch her get gang raped and that I wanted to see the life get drained out of her.

 

Truly terrible words that I never meant and only voiced over email after weeks of her ignoring me. I never physically hurt or threatened her in any form in person. I'm not trying to justify what I said, there's no excuse for what I said. I hated myself for a long time because I am not that type of person. I should never have another chance with her, but she also should not have another chance with me. There's always two sides to a story.

 

I'm very happy for you. Sex doesn't necessarily mean anything, but if she is saying she committed to working it out that is a step in the right direction.

 

Take it slow. From what I have read rekindling can introduce that "honeymoon" phase from the beginning of the RL which will fade just like the last time.

 

Also, if this means that much to you I would lose the pot all together. Showing her an old habit is going to bring her back to the reasons why you broke up the first time. Does she mean that much to you to drop it?

 

This is a new RL - not the old one. Treat it as such.

 

I'm not a religious guy but I pray this works out in your favor.

 

Rekindling has definitely introduced a honeymoon phase with us. We have had sex roughly 20 times in the past two weeks.

 

She knows I still smoke occasionally. She was actually at a party of mine when it happened again last weekend. All my friends really like her.

 

I don't know what's going to happen between us, but we have talked about everything in the past and we are working through it. We love each other and she's committed (she wants to date me already) so it seems easier.

 

I'm starting to fall for her all over again, we are going on our first official date tonight. I'm super excited and so is she. I'm still taking it very slow emotionally and have my reservations about her as she did break my heart and disappeared. I know who I am and if she is unable to accept me then I will have to let her go. This time would be the real end.

 

But we are different, more mature people now. Maybe this ends in heartbreak again, maybe it doesn't. I don't know. All I know is that we both believe this is worth fighting for again. And that's all that matters.

Edited July 20, 2016 by Gemini_jo

[gaig]

She knows I still smoke occasionally. She was actually at a party of mine when it happened again last weekend.

 

Why dont you drop it? When the honeymoon period is over, she might be more skeptic again about it..

[Gemini_jo]

We are officially dating again as of yesterday.

 

Was over two years not talking to each other after a bad break-up. Anything can happen with time. We are taking it slow, who knows if it'll work out, but it's worth a try!