scared shy Posted June 26, 2005 Share Posted June 26, 2005 So anyone have any thoughts on what would make a guy scared of a girl. What does that even mean? Lets just say for arguments sake the class-A a**h*** I like/love told my good friend he is scared of me, what would that connote to any of you out there? Link to post Share on other sites
shygurl Posted June 26, 2005 Share Posted June 26, 2005 Would be better to ask the good friend he told this too, to see what context it was said in because we could give you dozen "possible" reasons why he said it but that won't really help you, might just make you stress out about it? So ask you friend...was he joking when he said it? What we're they talking about right before he made that comment? Surely if this person he told it to is a "good friend", the good friend would have probably asked him "what do you mean by that? scared why?".....ask you friend. Link to post Share on other sites
Author scared shy Posted June 26, 2005 Author Share Posted June 26, 2005 Last weekend I went off on him for his over use of oxycontin (I am beginning to despise this drug)... Apparently since I care and am extremely worried about him... He told this friend I "put on airs" and act superior, and he is scared of me. I did not demand that he stop, I just told him I would not be willing to walk down that road and watch him be so destructive to himself. I care too much, and I don't know what else to do besides tell him that I think he has a problem and then walk away. What else to do? But why the scared comment? Does he think I am going to kick his ass if he doesn't stop? If anything I am scared of what he will do to himself. Link to post Share on other sites
shygurl Posted June 26, 2005 Share Posted June 26, 2005 Well it sounds to me like what you said to him hit a little too close to home, and while part of him knows there's truth to what youre saying, he's not ready to accept it......so because of this, it's easier to take the focus off of himself and put the focus onto you........making you out to be someone who think they're superior, etc. People often say rash, stupid things when they've been confronted. Try not to take it personally. Link to post Share on other sites
Author scared shy Posted June 26, 2005 Author Share Posted June 26, 2005 I agree with what you say, I am thinking my final step will be to write a letter to his mother... she enables him totally, was never there for him as a child with all the boarding schools and nanny's and all... so she feels guilty and lets him get away with everything... so I am hoping to write a letter to her and make her totally aware of everything. This is not his first drug problem, he used to to meth a lot but hasn't touched it for over 2 years... so I know that in writing this letter he will be furious and probably not talk to me anymore, but I am hoping maybe she will help him, rehab or something... and I really do love this man and want him to succeed and be happy and am willing to do whatever it takes. Do you think this is a good/bad idea? Link to post Share on other sites
shygurl Posted June 26, 2005 Share Posted June 26, 2005 So are you saying his Mom's never been aware of his past or current drug addiction? You say she's an enabler..........and likely that way to make up for the guilt she feels for not having been a good mom to him growing up................so if you tell her the situation, do you really think she'll understand the severity of the situation or could she just be in denial and only further enable him to carry on with his addiction - and then you're in a situation where she didn't help at all and he's angry at you for telling her his 'secret' and won't have anything to do with you? Why don't you call up a local Rehab/Drug Addiction place in your area and see if you can talk to one of the counsellors there...........about the best way to approach this. Or look for a local chaper of Narcotics Anonymous in your area...........they would have folks there who work with the family and loved ones of addicts. Link to post Share on other sites
Author scared shy Posted June 26, 2005 Author Share Posted June 26, 2005 that's a great idea and I could do that, but he already thinks I am 'being superior', so how can I help if I find this advice from the counselor and he doesn't listen? It's a bit of a conundrum I am in and really need to figure this out soon. He lives with this good friend of mine and she can keep 'watch' on him there and so can I cause I am over there a lot and he said she 'reports' back to me. Duh he moved in with one of my friends knowing we were that close, what was he thinking that this could all be kept a secret? So he lives there but pans on moving out in August with this new friend he gets the oxy from. BAD IDEA!! If he does that then he won't do better for himself at all. I am a firm believer in tough love sometimes but I just feel as if I am not doing all that I can before it gets to the tough love point. This makes me very sad. And what's even worse is his rantings to my friend, knowing it will get back to me, as she 'reports' to me. (his audacity is stupendous) So telling her I am superior and he is scared of me, she in turn sticks up for me and tells him it's because I care. Asks him if I was ever in trouble would he be there for me, he responds with "In a second", then asks him if he knows that I have his back if anyone anything ever hurt him, he says "I feel sorry for the mother******. Again DUH!! So he knows this but yet I am a rag/nag for saying STOP the insanity!! Link to post Share on other sites
IfiKnewThen Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 scared sky. wont use it here but please tell me where you got your avatar. so cute wanta download it. ifiknewthen. : ) would appreciate it Link to post Share on other sites
Author scared shy Posted June 30, 2005 Author Share Posted June 30, 2005 IfiKnewThen scared sky. wont use it here but please tell me where you got your avatar. so cute wanta download it Someone e-mailed it to me and I thought it was cute... so other than that I am not sure, you can download it from here though... easy as pie, right click save picture as name it viola you have a cute downloaded picture... Link to post Share on other sites
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