Should I call him again or is he just not interested?

[justagirl1121]

ok new dilemma.....shonna wants me to go to a pirates game with her friend on the 17 b/c she now has to work sundays. he's her friend who moved to boston now moved back (for a job or schooling or something) home. he's 26 and i was chking out his myspace thru her page and he seems kinda cool. seems kinda lonely (not like pathetic lonely, just the cant find anyone lonely...prob how we feel) so i dont know what i shld do?

 

my parents are annoying and i dont want anyone to meet them b/c they'll be embarrassing but living at home doesnt make for things working out very easily....what do you think i shld do ? that's if she brings it up agian. she prob will. she said i wouldnt go. so im figuring i shld just to spite her! haha. it'd be nice to do something w/ someone other than 12 yr old brother haha.

[justagirl1121]

where is everyone?!?!?! im starting to feel dumb writing here but i went to pirate game. it was a fun time. i really did enjoy it. he was cool guy, went to game, talked about some stuff we have in common then afterward we went to have something to eat and he paid and then when we got back he had 2 old lady neighbors out talking and then that was about it; he gave me a hug and said something about hanging out some time or maybe we'll see each other around...something to that effect.

 

so now im not real sure what to do. guess i'll just let it go. shonna's my middle lady i guess; she'll let me know if somethings going on. she called me for the scoop haha. not that there was much of any but nice day all the same.

 

hows amsterdam...how much longer you have to be down there?

[phyrespryte]

Hey Justagirl. I left Amsterdam a week ago and now I'm back home. Still having trouble readjusting. My sleep pattern is totally messed up and I feel drained. I wonder if it's the food?

 

With your guy situation...

Does he live in your area? I wouldn't worry so much about him meeting your parents. It'll be one awkward meeting that you'll both laugh at afterwards. Unless your parents are extremely weird...then you might want to give him a heads up. And I'm not really sure what you should do next. Did he say he'll call? Did you exchange numbers? I mean if you have his number you could always call him to say thanks then invite him out or something.

 

But then...I haven't really been living up to the calling a guy thing lately. So I'm not sure if that's sound advice anymore. My roommate in Amsterdam was one of those people who followed the doctrine of "he's just not that into you" and she kind of shook up my views on dating. Plus the discovery that foreign guy was quite popular with the women didn't help me much.

 

So some new stuff... I met a guy in Amsterdam. I have no nickname for him because well, he's different. But we can call him um...Steve.

 

*********how I met him (it's long)*************

I was at a club with a bunch of people from school. I was sober the whole night. My friend Sheila, on the other hand was wasted and flirting with all the guys. Well I was having a lousy time because I won't/can't dance if I'm sober. And I didn't really know anyone besides Sheila and she was too busy getting her dance on. So Steve comes along and starts talking to me about painting and books...harmless stuff. Well Sheila got so mad, she wouldn't talk to me. I got mad and left. Well Steve came chasing after me and asked me if I wanted to go for a walk and get lost.

 

So we walked around and actually got lost. It started raining really hard and we hid underneath some scaffolding to keep dry. He then said, "we're lost in Amsterdam, it's raining, it doesn't get more romantic than this, I think you better kiss me soon". :love: So then we were stuck under scaffolding kissing. We just stayed there talking and kissing all night. It really was ridiculously romantic. I didn't get home till around 5am. And he was such a gentleman. He didn't try to get under my shirt or grab um...stuff. We then shared a cab home and he refused to let me pay for my half. I feel bad about that because it was pretty expensive. Well we exchanged numbers and he called me the next day like he said he would.

 

Then things got a little crappy. He called me everyday for a week, but we weren't able to meet up. Finally we went out for coffee and that was awkward. Then the following week he'd call and then he wouldn't it was so messed up. Well my last night in Amsterdam we finally met up again. And that was good. Really good. I think the thing that amazed me though was that after the restaurant, we went back to his apartment. And we were supposed to watch a movie, but instead we ended up making out on his bed. But yeah the amazing part...we didn't have sex. We almost did though. And I'm kind of embarrassed that I was so forward with him...but he was like...let's wait. So instead we talked some more, kissed some more, and fell asleep. I don't think my trip to Amsterdam could've ended better.

************ fin ************************

 

Anyways, Steve is back in the states and we were supposed to go out tonight, but his car broke down and I no longer have a car. He said that he'll call me this week when he gets it fixed. And I guess the point is...he does most of the calling. And it's so weird for me. I'm not used to actually having a guy pursue me. It's weird, but nice. So I guess I think with Shonna's friend... you just might want to wait and see what happens? She'll probably try to set you guys up again. Or maybe he'll ask for your number? Or you could just get a myspace account and add him as a friend....

[phyrespryte]

bah.

 

I'm in a bad mood right now. First day back at the old job. The DM was like...she's back! Great! Put her on for as many hours as possible. And a couple of months ago I would've been all for that, but NO! If they're going to work me like a dog, then I'd like some benefits with that. Then the stupid 19yr old kid that got the full-time position was like...you're back? Why? I didn't tell him why. But that really bothered me.

 

Then stupid Steve. Ugh. Didn't call at all today. I don't get the guy at all. Back in amsterdam he's like wait for me. Then now he's all flakey. i'm over it.

going to become a nun.

[justagirl1121]

Hey, glad you're back from amsterdam. must have been something interesting! The romantic guy...that is so sudden!! sounds romantic though. does he seem like a good guy? i can understand the awkward thing! i think im not into the whole friends first thing b/c then its like they "know" you. and it'd be awkward if you start dating. but what do i know? hopefully steve will call you and not be the typical boy.

 

seriously though, the nun thing sounds like a good idea! i wish i could go back to being like 3 again! It's old enough to have an idea of what's going on, but young enough to be innocent and just play through it all!

 

same boring stuff here. I was so stressed out at work and stuff going on i almost cried after my first customer called in on friday and was a total ass. i usually dont let it bother me so I don't know what happened. I emailed resource management to see if there were any personal/vacation slots open i could take. like 2 minutes later the little box saying my schedule changed popped up so i was like oh! did i really!? and then the little email icon came up on my task bar tray...i was like wow....but was it for me to go home early? NO! It was just scheduling me for 20 minutes off the phone to take a little online training course on Call Sequencing. again. Customer Focus, Bridge to Business, Assess, something i dont remember but begins with a C, Options, Summarize...figures!

 

Anyway, the guy I went to pirates game with, he didnt call or txt me and that's fine. Guys dont like me so whatever. Friday when i walked shonna to her car when she was done working and i was on break asked if he'd called and i was like no...but i didnt expect him to. What do i get today? hmmm? Some text messages!! i was like oh god what am i getting into? I kinda like him tho, so it's not a bad thing; just a bit of a scary thing. He basically said he was working and that he went golfing yesterday but he sucked so we'll have to go putt putt so he can practice...so i guess that's like an invitation for something. im like oh lordy! so im like what the heck did shonna say to him?

 

now the other problem i have is this kid BB I mentioned before i think. He's a real cool kid. It was his bday yesterday. he asked if i wanted to get something to eat with him yesterday so when i was finished working and he got his lunch break we went to chik fil a. that's it. so now brooke is like do you like him? nicole is like he's a real cutie, you have my approval. im like ooh goddddd. dont really want to start a work relationship thing. my problem is just sthat he's way too skinny and not very tall and im like 5'6ish. this other kid from pirates game is like 6 footish, a little bigger. i think its a security thing. i go my whole life w/ nothing now in like 2 weeks i got all these problems!!!!!! but i cant figure out what's changed!!!!!

[phyrespryte]

Hi Justagirl!

 

So did you ever meet up with pirate boy? How exciting! He sounds cute too.

And I hope things aren't weird with the guy from work. If he asks you out again...you might want to say something about it just being a friend thing. Not sure how to word that nicely, but at least you can use the work excuse. I totally agree with you about not wanting to have a relationship with a guy from work. It's definitely not worth it.

 

So romantic guy...

We went out last Thursday. He drove 2 hours from his place to see me (I was without a car that night). It should've been an hour, but he got stuck in traffic. Poor guy. Then we went to Roadhouse Grill for dinner. I had no clue what a gross place that was. If I did I wouldn't have suggested it. There was peanuts in a barrel, our drinks were in mayonaisse jars, and my dinner looked like roadkill.

 

The waitress asked me if I wanted a box for it, since I barely touched it. And Steve was like...if you get a box you might want to poke some holes in it so it can breathe. Oh and the waitress was such a jerk. She was totally fixated on Steve. She's like...ooh good choice...oooh are you enjoying the meal....oooh hope you have a good night. She only looked at me once and that's when she offered me the box. And when she looked at me it was with disgust...like I can't believe you didn't finish all that roadkill. Oh well. We then went to go look for his grandmother's old house. I almost got him lost because I really suck with directions. After that we went to some park and made out in his car. It was hilarious. The radio was on and this porno sounding song was playing. So of course I had to laugh at that. Then a security car passed by and we sat there trying to look innocent. I swear it was like I was in highschool. Quite possibly the cheesiest date ever.

 

It was great! What's weird though...we have so much in common. It really freaks me out. Back in Amsterdam he's like...I have a feeling we have a lot in common. I really didn't agree with him, but now I'm just surprised. Life is totally random like that I guess.

[justagirl1121]

haha i will make sure i dont go to a Roadhouse Grill! Oh dear...at least you got some laughs out of it right? Do you like him? Is he sounding like someone who isnt going to be a big douche bag and would want to have a real relationship? Hopefully, if that's something you want too!

 

i did go out with the pirate boy. we went to max and erma's then miniatrue golfing. when time came to pay for dinner i never know how to handle that. i never am good at letting people pay for me and i didnt really know if i should just sit there and just let him pay or say something so i said something. and he's like 'if you want...' so i kinda paid for myhalf of the meal......ok......he did pay the 5 bucks for the golf but there were points where like no one one moving nad so i stepped up and put my ball down and he's like ok... and said something like he was going to go first since he was ahead and i can take pointers....if he does good do what he does if he does bad dont do what he did....but then there were other times where he was like 'ladies first' so i dont know!!! it kinda disappointed me a little bit! at the end he gave me a hug thats it. which is fine. = no commitment. didnt make any plans to do anything else. im not texting him back. he can do the work if he is interested. but i dont know what to think about that. figures it turns out like this, its me!!!!!

Grrrrrr

[phyrespryte]

Yeah the paying thing is always weird. Whenever they start looking at the bill, I'll pull out my wallet and ask how much I owe. If they say it's ok. I'll ask one more time if they're sure and if they still say yes, I'll let it go. Unless I'm really set on paying for the meal. Then there's no stopping me.

 

I think your date went well. I mean he gave you a hug and I think that's always a good thing. He sounds a bit awkward though. I always wonder about that door holding thing. I think some guys just naturally understand that and others aren't as aware of that. I have guy friends that always do that for me and it weirds me out everytime. I always appreciate it, but it's kind of surprising. But then Steve wasn't so great with the door thing either and I didn't really notice until I actually thought about it.

 

And I think pirate boy should've paid for you. I mean he did ask you out and it's just a nice thing to do. But at least he paid for the golf. Was there any flirting going on? What was his body language like? Just because I like to overanalyze everything. Was he leaning in when you guys talked? How was the conversation? Did it flow? Any weird moments of silence? Oh and did you have a good time? Has he called since? Have you talked to Shonna about him?

 

Ok I'm going to stop with the third degree.

So with the whole Steve thing. I really like him. He's so nice and he always says the cutest/cheesiest things. Like the other day we were sitting next to each other during this presentation thing and he was like...I have the best seat in the room.

 

So far I don't think he's going to be a douche bag. The whole relationship thing is so confusing to me and I'm scared to say I think things will work. It's still early and I don't want to jinx stuff. But we're taking things super slow, so I guess I'll see?

 

I kind of wonder how difficult this will be though. He's in the Master's program and I know that he's always going to be real busy. Then throw in the fact that I live an hour away... I don't know. And it's kind of weird for me because he's way more outgoing than I am. Like everyone knows him. I wonder if my shyness will bother him? But then he said that's why he was attracted to me in the first place.

[justagirl1121]

sheesh boys! well things sound like they're going in the right direction with Steve. I like cheesy. pirate boy was kinda flirty at the baseball game. i guess it was flirty. like he was telling me about how when he was always driving the truck his left arm wld get tan and his right wouldnt so he'd be lopsided and he like leaned over and was practically putting his left hand in my lap to show how he'd start driving like that so that his left arm wouldnt get any tanner...or i was telling him how this retard on a motorcycle was driving the parkway on the white line when im right htere and he almost smacked his foot off my car, i was like you idiot!!! no one could pass him b/c he was like in limbo w/ the lanes. apparently pirate boy thought i was getting upset w/ retelling hte story, (ppl always are like calm down, tho im perfectly calm. i'll just start being monotone!) and he's like awwww..are you ok? and like patted my back.....see what i mean?

 

wasn't real flirty when we met the second time. like we joked and told stories and it wasnt really awkward. like 3 years ago the sound of a date terrified me. but it can be fun! hahaha. i havent talked to him since. so im like maybe he decided im just eh. he did leave a comment on the my space i never log into tho haha. that was the next day. i did reply back something stupid. sooooo....but i havent logged in in a day or two so i dont know if he responded. myspace is retarded. it always errors out on me and says they are sending it to the myspace technical team. i tried logging on thru mobile web on my phone and was getting those errors too. grrr

 

so i think i will txt him today and ask how tiger woods is doing. hopefully that's not lame? cause he likes golf and all. probably sounds stupid...oh well i guess at this point i cant lose what i dont have!

 

well im off to work as i will start running late!

[justagirl1121]

Oh! I was just cracking up at the fact that you used to be all code names for these boys and i was just using their names and we totally switched it around! hehe....(hey i need something to get me thru the day with these frickin idiots i have to talk to. ugh)

[phyrespryte]

Eh. It's 2am over here. I should be finishing up this project. It's due at 1pm. I've got about 8 hours to finish it. Have to allow 2 hours for the long drive to school. And another hour for morning stuff. But I feel frozen. Like I can't do it. I have the idea, but the getting started isn't happening. I'm not sure why.

 

I have to say that I can't stand this whole dating thing. Like I really miss being in a relationship, but this dating stuff...I could really do without. And Steve... he's so confusing. My friend is like...he's so noble. But I don't know. I just get the feeling that he's really not as into me as I am him. Yeah I know why he doesn't want to have sex. But I still can't help thinking there's something wrong with me. And maybe he is a busy guy, but it's like. I don't know. My last relationship was suffocating, so in a sense I'm glad that's he's not blowing up my phone and trying to be with me every day. But at the same time I just feel kind of um...unwanted? I really don't know where I stand with him. And it drives me crazy...

 

Like the other day we were at his place. We were on his bed making out and then for a moment we stopped and just started talking. Which is normal. Usually we get back to business, but this time he started talking about homework! Then he was like I'm hungry and then went and got a granola bar. He offered me one, but I declined.

Maybe it's just the way my brain is wired...but when I'm making out with him...I don't think...wow I've got a paper to write or I feel like a granola bar right about now. Usually I'll think f*ck that paper this is so much more fun. I just won't sleep tonight.

 

Oh well. I guess it's too early to say what's going on. And the past couple of weeks have been weird. I suppose when he finally settles into his schedule things will make more sense? I can't think too much about this. I really need to finish stuff up.

 

So what's up with pirate boy? Yeah the name reversal is kind of weird. But like I said...this guy steve he's different. He's really different. He's nothing like the other guys I've liked in the past. Anyways.

Pirate boy...have you talked to him since? The myspace comment thing sounds like a good thing. The date didn't sound bad to me either. But what do I know. My guy friend says that 2nd dates are always the worst. Because both people are usually nervous and they want to kiss or whatever, but don't want to come on too strong or early or whatever. So maybe that's what was going on?

[motherlode]

Know what hon? when you have to sit around and analyze at the beginning of a relationship then chances are it is not the reelationship for you. Relationships should be full of synergy and excitment at the onset at the very least. I say give the guy his walking papers and dont let this wear down your self-esteem. Thank God for unanswered prayers I say!

[justagirl1121]

I don't know, i think some ppl are just like that. boys are overall confusing. i'd give steve a chance...it's just like one one hand ppl are looking for ppl to be honest and straightforward and stop wondering what hte hecks going on, yet on the other hand, the moment you reveal your feelings, the other person gets scared off.

 

And why don't guys call? They'll text message, but they wont' call! The guy I did like (douchebag scott) called all the time and never texted...these others text but don't call! grrr

 

i'd just take steve along for the ride you know, i mean we're kinda shy, we don't really know what we're doing, and i think as usual it'll happen or it wont and it'll hopefully make us stronger. i mean, you can fight for it if you really believe in it, but face it, we're not a soap opera and we don't have the same guts they do. i think that's part of it.

 

pirate boy is a bit confusing. i was like shonna, why is it everytime you ask me if we talked (me and him) the next day i hear from him?! (via text of course)...i dont really get the feeling that she's saying anything to him, i think it is just coincidence. anyway, i was like he can do it all im not doing anything. i liked him, i'll hang out with him, but at this point i dont have that butterfly feeling or anything where i need something to happen so ill just let him do the work.

 

anyway, monday i heard from him around like 10:30 am. we sent a few text back and forth. tuesday nothing. this morning, it got earlier, 9:30. i got a msg that said "happy over the hump day:)" i replied "someone is glad its wednesday" and he's like "nah, just an excuse to say hi :)" ok thought that was cute. flirty right? or is he normally that way? dont know him well enough to tell. so i was like 'that's sweet.hi!" and he said something like "well i know how much you loooove your job so anything that'll perk it up

 

and he's posting on my space and things like that so...anyway, will keep you posted.

keep me posted on steve. the food thing...i think that's just a guy. i probably wouldnt do what he did but guys are different. they like sex and all but i dont think they're emotions are quite as attached at this point as ours are. but i know how you feel!

[phyrespryte]

so i was going to reply to ML that though I agree with her...i would still give this guy a chance as it's still kind of early.

but it doesn't really matter anymore. he said that we don't have anything in common and he doesn't see it working in the long run.

 

because you know my life wasn't perfect enough.

now i'm really tired. i'm exhausted. i don't understand anything at all. i mean i do...but i don't.

 

i know it's all his fault. a little mine. but mostly his because he thinks way too ****ing much. i never met someone who treated every stinking situation like a ****ing life changing event.

but whatever. i can't do anything about it. i'm destined to be alone.

[Guest]

Ok... heres my story, theres this guy i really like he says he likes me back and weve been out a couple of times.. but if i dont call him ortxt him he wont do it! WHYYYY?

 

Is he really interested? I dont know what to so anymore, should i txt him, should I call or should i just wait for him to do it and pretend im not mad when he does?

 

Pls... if any guy is reading this tell me what to do, at least a little hint would help!

[justagirl1121]

guys, why do they do that? makes no friggin sense! steveo came out of the blue. i cant tell if being friends first is better or not! like if you're friends you know if you like someone a bit better b/c you get to know them but then its always been a bit awkward for me at the thought to become intimate w/ someone im friends with rather than someone i just met. i almost think itd be easier to have a one night stand with someone cause i can be whatever with no preconceptions u know?

 

but then...like who wants to really jump into something if you're not sure and then risk hurting hte person. (guys dont seem to care about hurting us tho..and the ones that do are the ones who are taken!)

 

i wasnt going to message pirate boy...figured id let him do the rest but i wanted to talk to him. i really like him thru text messaging. he's funny. he uses ":)" a lot. i dont know if hes just like that. just dont picture guys giving the . so i msged him today was like "tgif!" we were talkin abt scary movies a bit and hten he goes "was that a hint? wanna go see a movie tomorrow night?" so i dont know what he wants...

 

i dont get it tho texting is the new calling. they dont call the plans are set up thru txting. i'd kinda prefer a call but he has goofy schedule. miines more cut and dry. he knows when im done. hecld call. whatever.

 

guest..need more info. how many days has it been? has he txted at all? you cld send a txt. dont worry about it. dont text like everyday, just randomly send a msg like "happy over hte hump day" or "so glad it's friday, huh?" or something like that. and try not to be the last to text back all the time.

[phyrespryte]

So I've been trying to post this for awhile, but I keep getting all antsy. But now I feel a little saner and want to get this all out. Wednesday night Steve dumped me. At first the night started out real good. He kept flirting with me at school and then after his class we went out for dinner. At dinner things were a bit awkward. Lots of silence, but then I was really tired since I had been up since 5am. Well when the waitress took my plate away...Steve said...this isn't going to work.

 

I was stunned and didn't say anything. That made him freak out. Finally I asked why and he gave me the nothing in common line. I then asked if we could go for a walk.

 

So we walked. He told me that he found me attractive, but only felt friendship towards me. I asked if it was because I was so quiet and I wasn't as affectionate. He said it was a little bit of that. I cried.

 

And then we sat down and talked non-stop. Which is funny because it was all things I think we should've talked about weeks ago. And it wasn't all serious, there was lots of joking around. He told me that he actually talked to his dad about me. I think his dad must've thought he was thinking too hard because he told Steve that he'd have a really hard time trying to find a relationship by being rational.

 

Steve also told me that he was afraid of being in a relationship and that he just wanted to hang out with his friends. He said that he felt bad that he didn't spend more time with me or call me as often. I told him...DUH! I like that he has his own life and I have my own. I didn't want to be suffocated. And he was surprised by that.

He then told me about this girl he was fixated with. He never kissed her and she didn't want anything to do with him. They weren't even close friends! But he said that her rejection messed him up.

 

He also kept apologizing for being a jerk to me. It was weird to see how messed up he was. I wonder if it was guilt or if he did really care about my feelings?

 

After 2 hours we had the first moment of silence since we left the restaurant. I asked him to hold me and we sat there in silence for a long time. I pulled away and asked him to walk me to my car. More hugging. Not the ass-out hug. Full body hug.

I told him I didn't want to be friends. He said not to think about it. That we should just do what feels right and see what happens. He said that he'd call me on Friday.

 

Well he called and we talked for like 20 minutes. But we didn't talk about Wed. night. And I really wish I had said something. He asked me what I was doing this weekend and he told me how he was pretending to be Jewish and that he was taking Saturday off. I asked him if he could help me with this project and he said that sorry Saturday is the day of rest. I asked if Sunday was good since Saturday was bad for me anyways. He said sure and to give him a call. He also mentioned that some random girl from high school called him because she was in town. He said that he wasn't sure what to do because he didn't really know her and that he didn't know the area too well. I don't know why he told me that.

 

I'm so freaking confused. I think he still likes me and that he wanted to break up because he didn't feel fireworks when he was with me. But I think that was because I would get so shy around him. So I wonder if maybe after that night he's re-thinking things? But then I wonder....could he really be that scared of a relationship? Could he be a commitment phobe? Because that's some scary stuff I don't want to mess with.

 

Anyways Guest like Justagirl said...we need details. As you can tell by my massive post. Details are appreciated. But my vague gut feeling tells me this guy isn't really worth it. I wouldn't text him anymore. Unless you just want to be friends with him...then keep texting him. I only say this because I have a guy friend who was exactly like that when we first met. And that's why we're friends. When he finally met a girl he really liked he made an effort to meet up with her. Something that he never did for me. That meant he'd call and text her. Mostly text her, but he made sure to ask her out.

 

And Justagirl...pirate boy was flirting!

Did you say yes to the movie? Please tell me you said yes! I agree texting is weird. But then I think it just feels safer for most people? As long as there's asking out going on...I think it's alright with me.

[justagirl1121]

ok, what's up with steve? that doesn't make a lot of sense. to just keep talking? like you're all buddy buddy? is he trying to now "still be friends?" that dosnt make anysense nad never works as far as i can see. tho that's kinda how it was with scott...for one phone call till he stopped talking to me completely...that cld happen with steve. sounds pretty guy typical. tho maybe it wont...but do u just want to be friends w/ him if you have other feelsings? hmmm...i can understand abt the not being affectionate thing. i dont really know how to be affectionate. i mean i DO. it just always seems too forced. or what if that person doesnt WANT me to be affectionate, its like AUGH!! didnt u say he said he doesnt want to be in a relationship cause he wants to be wiht his friends? then what's this with being fixated on this one girl and having another girl coming to town..? what the hell is up with BOYS!!!!!!!!!!????????? holy friggin cow. how does anyone get married and reproduce anymore?!?!

 

guest, yes, need more details please! that way we can give you some better feedback. us two, we give like every single frickin detail of what goes on. and it helps anaylze things better! and its good to get it off your chest!!!

 

as for pirate boy, here's what happened today/night:

 

he called me! check that out! i didnt answer tho as i was showring at hte moment. i called him back and then he called me back later since he'd ben test driving some cars he was looking to get. so we talked for a few minutes. i swear he started calling me affectionate names on that call! i was in a store so it wasnt always easy to hear what he was saying. i think he said baby but im not sure but he did call me darling. i wasnt sure how to respond to that i think i kinda laughed. i dont know...im flippin' retarded.

 

so i met him for the movies. we ended up seeing The Departed. We were goign to see tx chainsaw but he asked if we cld see departed. whatever. i guess. it was a good movie. i liked it. there were some funny parts

 

so things he was doin were like he gave me hug and stuff when we first saw each other. bought me a drink. got some popcorn. patted my head when he was saying something. (what's with these guys patting my head? do you get that too?) not like touchy feely but wld like kinda put his arm around me for a sec when he was explaining something things like that. at the end, gave me a kiss on the cheek and a hug. that's one up from just a hug last time...

 

ok first time meeting i wldnt expect anything, not even really on second time, 3rd times not much of a big deal, but if we go out a 4th time i think by then we shld be figuring out if we're just going to be friends and hang out or what. i think things are off to a good start. i mean, he called. that's a good sign right? no stupid txt. we did txt a bit here and there regarding movie time and stuff. oh walking back after hte movie i figured we were gonna go to the car but he asked if i wanted to go get something to eat/drink. so we did that for a bit. i dont like eating out tho like that. i get kidna nervous and lose my appitite and start to feel kinda naucous so i cant like force food down or i feel like im gonna throw up. any idea on how to get rid of that feeling??

 

not sure what to do from here. shonna's gonna want the scoop tomorrow. guess i can try to see what she thinks since she knows him better.

 

i think im interested. now i've known him a bit better, seen him a little more, his looks have grown on me. i mean i thought he was cute when i first saw him. like a dorky cute. i guess he's more cute now. im not like really picky with body stuff physically on guys, i just like them to be bigger than me. im thin but i dont want to hug somoene who's a stick u know what i mean? so phsycially im attracted. he's funny, fairly easy to be around. things like that. guess we'll see how long before he texts back.

 

well im tired! and have a massive headache.

[Guest]

OK, so I've been reading this forum and I like the way you all think, so here's one for you all to think over...

I grew up with this guy...lets call him Tim. We were semi-friends all throughout school, and after highschool I went to University. This past summer I moved back home, and Tim and I started hanging out. However, Tim had a live-in girlfriend at the time (I know, I know, mistake number 1) that he didn't even like anymore, but she had no where else to go apparently. Anyway, she eventually went back to college and they broke up.

 

I know that this was not a good situation for him, and he was pretty sick of her by the time she left. So then Tim adn I had a couple of good weekends together and it was fun. Now he says he's still interested in a long-term thing with me, but not right now. He needs some time I guess. But he still wants me to call and talk and stuff. Is he regreting this and just wants to go back to being friends? I do really like him, and I don't mind waiting if he really is trying to deal with stuff. But I don't want to be strung along for the next however long.

 

Now I'm back at school, so that makes it even harder I think. To call or not to call...If I 100% believed that he still wanted something, I would call. But if he just wants to go back to being friends, and said that becuase he doesn't want to hurt me then I need some time...If I'm just the girl that he was using to make himself feel better about his ex, then that would be not good...

[phyrespryte]

Now he says he's still interested in a long-term thing with me, but not right now. He needs some time I guess. But he still wants me to call and talk and stuff. Is he regreting this and just wants to go back to being friends?

 

Hm. Ok one question...does he want you to call and talk about the relationship? Or does he just want to talk to shoot the breeze?

 

Because if he just wants to talk...then he's perfectly capable of calling you and you shouldn't be expected to do that. It sounds to me like he just enjoys your company and doesn't want to lose that. Which to me sounds like he just wants to be friends until he figures things out.

 

If it were me I wouldn't wait around to see if he changes his mind. Especially if you don't want to be friends. He'll just be a painful reminder of what you can't have.

 

But then I'm extremely bitter right now.

I talked to Steve yesterday. He said that he feels a lot better since he dumped me and that he feels it was the right decision. Well he didn't say it like that, but you know...

And he insists that all he feels is friendship. I'm so mad right now. Friendship? F*ck that sh*t. How can he feel friendship when he didn't even really try to get to know me? He's like let's just be friends. I said fine. But today I skipped school...again. And I've decided that if I do see him around, I'm going to run the other way. It's not worth it. I feel like my mind's been seriously f*cked with and I don't want to be near someone like that ever again.

 

I seriously don't believe any of the lines he gave me. I don't believe we didn't have a connection. We did. He's just an idiot who freaked out over nothing and ran. The fact that he feels friendship with me...that means he felt comfortable around me. He said we had a great physcial connection...that's a connection!!!! I mean I've never wanted to screw someone I only viewed as a friend. I may view someone as a friend because I can't screw them. But never the other way around. It's a huge load of crap. I bet he's just scared that he'll have to behave like a boyfriend and make time for me. He probably thinks I'll cut into all his guy bonding time. Douche bag.

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Geez I'm so mad at him. I don't want to be his friend at all. I don't want anymore guy friends. It hurts way too much knowing that I wasn't good enough for them. And knowing my luck within a couple of weeks he'll be dating some girl and will be all gung-ho about her. Just like match.com guy. Yeah he fed me that same I'm not ready for a relationship garbage too. But wouldn't you know...a week later he was back with his ex and then two weeks later he's with a new girl who he's been dating for over 6 months now.

 

Not ready my ass.

 

Anyways...now I'm back to feeling sad. Gargh. I can't wait till I'm over this.

 

And Justagirl...pirate guy sounds really cute. And I get the head patting too. I like it. I think it means they think you're cute. Or at least that's the vibe I get whenever that happens. And I think it's a great sign that he gave you a hug and a kiss on the cheek! I hope that he isn't a douche bag and things work out. I really hope he's got his head on straight and isn't all wishy washy about things.

[lucky23]

/Hm. Ok one question...does he want you to call and talk about the relationship? Or does he just want to talk to shoot the breeze?/

I don't know what he's thinking...and I'm way to stubborn to call right now. I think he just wants to talk about anything BUT the relationship, if you can even call it that. I've decided if wants to think about it all, go ahead and think. I told him to let me know when he's dealt with whatever it is he's dealing with, and we'll see then. Big words coming from a girl who hasn't stopped thinking about him ever since...I'm heading for heartbreak here.

I completely agree...guys and friendships can get way too complicated...but when it all works out, it's so worth it. Sorry, I'm still hopeful. I'll learn.

So glad that I can vent and complain on here, because my roommate has got to be getting fed up with me!

[phyrespryte]

I've decided if wants to think about it all, go ahead and think. I told him to let me know when he's dealt with whatever it is he's dealing with, and we'll see then. Big words coming from a girl who hasn't stopped thinking about him ever since...I'm heading for heartbreak here.

I completely agree...guys and friendships can get way too complicated...but when it all works out, it's so worth it. Sorry, I'm still hopeful. I'll learn.

So glad that I can vent and complain on here, because my roommate has got to be getting fed up with me!

I know what you mean about being hopeful. I'm glad that you told him to go figure stuff out first. I think that if you kept talking to him you'll always be confused and hopeful and it'll feel like he's leading you on. I feel the same way about Steve. I can't talk to him at all because I just know that I'll keep hoping for something.

And if you feel like venting and complaining some more. Feel free to do so! My friends are sick of my drama too, so this is always good when my brain won't stop repeating thoughts.

[elijahBailey]

hey girls, still at it I see

14,600+ views. You girls rock. Keep going girls

[justagirl1121]

ElijahBailey!!!! wow!!! i bet you didnt read thru all the posts though!!! That's probably a good thing. we're still here trying to figure things out.

 

Guest....the toughest thing is to know if to call or not. And P is right. He is perfectly capable of calling himself. I think that regardless of the type of ship it is...the communication has to be two sided. All sorts of things can happen if it's only onesided. Like complete chaos. I'd say if you want you can try calling him once or twice...if you're in the mood to do so...but if he doesnt put any iniative to take his turn that I'd say he doesnt deserve a turn!!

I have this 2 call rule. If they don't get back after that, then I know where I stand!!!

 

I always get hopeful. Even when it turns into being not so hopeful I try to find the hope that's maybe not there at all. Just because it sucks to not be there, you know?

 

P, what's going on with steve-o? He completely out of the pic for good? I know it's hard and hurts for a while. New guys can make it go away...but they usually go away real quick too and then you have MULTIPLE guys hurting us...grrrr

 

So, all my life i've gone without catching any guys eye. Now within the month I've got several! I'm like WTF!? And half come in all the wrong places!!! I mentioned BB. Well, now he's started to act on his intentions I think. The other day he told me I looked nice but i had felt like crap. Hated what i was wearing...all that. My mom told me i looked nice too tho...so who knows?

 

Now, he's started texting me! Like out of the blue! I was teasing b/c while we were at work he was all texting jen (more like bro/sis relationship w/ them) and i was like hey where are my text what the deal? so then i got this "pretty girls who are unspoken for make me nervious" i was like oh crap. then he mentioned the fact we should hang out, and now i get this "i was gonna ask if you wanted to hang out" oh double crap with whipped cream. what do i do? He's a sweetie and i wanna be friends and hang out and stuff...he's a cool kid and he's got cute potential, but he's not very tall and he's really skinny. I have tons more fat on me than he does, u know...the attraction is just not there for like dating material. It's just not. I try not to be too picky but you can't help it you know? But I don't want to lead him on.

 

And there's pirate boy. I'm not sure. it's like with bb i know what's goin on, but pirate boy who i kinda like, im not quite sure. he's like dorky cute, 6'2' i dont know abt built (which doesnt really matter to me) but he's not like skinny minny or fatty either; its all in proportion. i get these vibes though. seems lilke we have a few things in common.

 

earlier i txted him and asked him what good shots would be for when shonna and i went out earlier. he said "body shots are always fun. haha" so i had to ask my friend april what those were lol and she told me. so i replied back "yeah will get right on those body shots. anyone ever tell you you're funny?" and he was like "nope...just goofy" so i was like "hey ya can't go wrong with goofy ;)" Is that flirty? he replied back with "glad u like. ;)"

soooo.....shonna said she's not getting involved (which is good) but she did say she asked him what he thought and he said i was cute. so i guess thats good sign? she says he is a nice guy adn probably just wants to be careful. and that he's always looking for someone to date but he has a lot of girls who are friends too...so i am a little lost....he msgs me regularly on my space tho i dont know if its just normal he posts comments to my blogs and whatnot and does it to his other friends too...

 

well im tired. i had this chocolate cherry shot (good stuff), a grasshopper drink, a fuzzy navel, and a miller lite in under 3 hrs...and didnt feel a freakin' thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! geeeeeezzzzzzz

[elijahBailey]

ElijahBailey!!!! wow!!! i bet you didnt read thru all the posts though!!! That's probably a good thing.

 

You bet right, girl

But I bet there're people who do. You go, girls