Better approach?

[Bantosm]

I wrote about a 2nd shot in an earlier post about a time when I took a date when I was feeling and looking lousy. Although we got along well enough I did make some uncharacteristic mistakes and things went downhill from there. I never made another attempt yet. I seen her the other day and she gave me a strong look and then looked away. I thought she looked very cute. I doubt she recognized me or even remembers who I am and it's just as well. I probably wouldn't have an idea who she was if I hadn't seen her nametag.

 

I would like to try for a second shot. Now she seems to be kind of shy. I have two options I can try and flirt with her at her place of work or use social media. I usually do much better in person. I'm concerned that a direct approach may maker her nervous or I could get in trouble etc. The social media approach takes the burden off of her but it has own drawbacks.

 

In this situation what do you suggest as the most productive approach?

[preraph]

You lost me. You think that a woman you went out on a date with and who you visit at her work will not remember your face? That's a pretty strange thing to say. Are you HOPING she won't remember so you can try again, hoping for another shot? She remembers. You gave no other details, so I have no idea what didn't work out or why to say anything else. If she told you she isn't interested, however, if that is the case, do not try again. Good luck.

[Bantosm]

You lost me. You think that a woman you went out on a date with and who you visit at her work will not remember your face?

She and I went on a date several years ago. I didn't visit her. The other day I walked by and we looked at each other for a moment. I'm good at remembering faces but if had I not seen her name tag I would have no idea it was her. It's very doubtful she remembers who I am from the date.

Are you HOPING she won't remember so you can try again, hoping for another shot?

It was one of my worst dates. If she forgot about it then it could only be a benefit in terms of another chance.

You gave no other details, so I have no idea what didn't work out or why to say anything else.

The date itself failed because I too tired and looked terrible. At the time she was getting over a bad breakup, and she wasn't looking for a relationship.

[preraph]

She remembers. I remember guys I never EVEN went out with.

[Bantosm]

She remembers.

Why because you say so?

I remember guys I never EVEN went out with.

I think most people would tend to forget someone they met only once after a couple of days or weeks, let alone after several years. The only reason I remember her is because it was one my worst dates but if I hadn't seen her nametag then there is no way.

[Satu]

*Why because you say so?

I think most people would tend to forget someone they met only once after a couple of days or weeks, let alone after several years. The only reason I remember her is because it was one my worst dates but if I hadn't seen her nametag then there is no way.

 

Recognising and remembering faces, is hot-wired into us.

 

Babies less than 3 months old, are very adept at it.

 

It's a survival mechanism, for the recognition of friend and foe.

 

As Preraph said, she recognised you.

[redbaron007]

Just stop obsessing about it and go direct - only way you will know for sure..

[Bantosm]

Recognising and remembering faces, is hot-wired into us.

That is true but only for short term memory.

Our results show that we can store more faces than other objects in our visual short-term memory.

Recognizing and Remembering Faces

Recalling faces days, weeks or years later is not what the human brain was evolved to do. If that was the case my memory would be overloaded with all the people I meet on a day to day basis. In reality most of these faces are lost to memory in a short period of time.

Babies less than 3 months old, are very adept at it.

True but they also adept at looking at flashing lights but not useful for the situation I described.

As Preraph said, she recognised you.

Why because the woman I described gave me strong look? I get the same looks regularly from women who are a similar age and I am certain that they do not know me. I'll give the same look if an attractive female suddenly enters my field of view.

[Bantosm]

Just stop obsessing about it and go direct - only way you will know for sure..

That's what I done. Unfortunately I didn't get get much feedback pro/con to either approach. I just sent a short message. It might be difficult to find her work again.