Photos

[just peachy]

Its been 2 years since me and the ex called it off and last night for the first time i went back in time. I pulled out the hard drive he gave me when we were together to save all of our photos/videos and things when we were living together etc. I didn't cry i didn't feel bad, i actually smiled and was okay and missed us as a whole, truly felt we were amazing together and had really beautiful memories despite the horrible ones.

 

Anyways, i hate the fact that i have 8 years worth of memories in photos and he doesn't have them but i do. Sometimes i feel like sending him all the photos so he can have the feeling of what do i do with all these as opposed of me feeling that. We have so many photos its ridiculous!

 

What did you do with your photos? Should i delete them, send them to him (that would be super awkward and weird since we haven't spoken since and who knows if he's in a new relationship i don't want to be weird) i just really do not know what to do i hate that i was the one left with this box of memories, I wish he had them, i wish he looked at them and remembered everything we went through and shared.

 

Don't get me wrong i already dealt with the horrible break up and i am passed it i just simply do not know what to do with all these photos it just sucks that i was the one left with them to soak up memories i wish he was the one to have seen them instead to be reminded instead of me.

[jen1447]

Probably not a good idea to send them to him as, real or not, it'd look like a big flashing sign saying "I'm not over you."

 

Personally I don't think you should trash that kind of stuff unless it's really bitter and painful. The best type of moving on is acceptance of what happened and the way things are, and you don't try to forget stuff in that context. Just stick the drive in a drawer/box/closet somewhere along w/your other mementos.

[seamos]

To me, photos have a weirdly, nearly sacred value. Many times for me they've become the only thing I have representing a certain piece of my life (good or bad) Even memories fade to almost nothing, esp. w/o photos to maintain certain details. Heck, I have the same problem w/ photos sometimes as my mother does w/ her old worn out bibles. I have boxes and boxes of them of them in storage.

 

I think I would contact him, by whatever method seems appropriate and ask if he would like any. Short, simple and direct. He may not, someone he's w/ may not want him to have any (oh, well), or he may have assumed you got rid of them or was afraid to ask and be incredibly grateful for an opportunity to have some.

 

Either way, you will have done what you needed to give him the chance.

 

It's good to feel that you're past all of it, although it sounds like there are still emotions from it, but not overpowering.

 

I just know I've never seen anyone, myself included, who rediscovered pictures from their past and then regretted not deleting them years ago.

[idiot 274]

I deleted every photo i had and left her with all of the framed photos. I also left everytththing she had ever given, stupid little things i don't want in my possession. I destroyed every card and left her with all the letters and love notes. I'm starting to forget what she looks like. I never want to see any kind of reminder.

[Mikep88]

I also deleted all the photos and got rid of all the items she gave me. Even gave the clothes she bought me to charity and the only thing I still have of her is my watch. Mostly sent everything back to her as I want to completely forget her. No one has hurt me so badly, therefore she does not exist and we have never met before!

[BC1980]

I deleted every photo of my ex, but I did it really quickly after it ended. So I never had time to second guess it. I didn't regret it though. I had some framed photos that I kept for awhile, but I eventually threw them out. Just last week, I was rummaging around in my wallet and found two photos of his son that I had forgotten about. I decided it was time to throw those out too.

 

Since yours are on a disk, maybe you should just put them in a drawer if they don't bother you too much. Ten years from now, you might want to look at them again. As long as they don't bother you on a daily basis, I'd say keep them for now.

[Heart..PLS STAHP]

I threw away everything.. it was painful for me I cried so hard I felt someone was cutting my heart with a bread knife..

 

All keychains, gifts, photos either framed or not, postcards everything... only thing left in my house is a christmas gift to my parents and an old model car she gave to my father when I invited her to my father's 50 year anniversary.

I have photos in FB but I am afraid to open them still. I wish to delete them but the pain is unbearable still. Maybe when I finally move on I'll delete them but I can't keep them. It will only remind me of a past long gone and a person that is no longer there.

 

Even now writing this my eyes are watering... you however are lucky to have finally moved on. Well done!

[just peachy]

thanks everyone for sharing your experience, i decided it would be a really awkward to email him photos specially after not talking in so long so i just decided to put the hard drive away and forget it exists for a couple more years. After looking at all those memories it brought me back and although i feel a lot stronger now at times i do still miss him.

[BC1980]

thanks everyone for sharing your experience, i decided it would be a really awkward to email him photos specially after not talking in so long so i just decided to put the hard drive away and forget it exists for a couple more years. After looking at all those memories it brought me back and although i feel a lot stronger now at times i do still miss him.

 

It's just weird to decide what to do with photos. It took me an entire year before I could even look at a picture of my ex. Most of mine were on my phone and when I made the snap decision to delete them, I couldn't take it back. Still, I probably would've deleted them eventually. I only had a few hardcopies of photos. I ended up throwing those photos away at some point. I think you just have to do it do you feel like is best for you and what you can handle. I got rid of nearly every gift he ever got me. I did end up keeping one nice piece of pottery just because I liked it. But it took a very long time before I could even pull that out of the closet and put it on the shelf.

[SunLeaves]

I plan to upload them all to a cloud drive and delete them off my computer. Maybe it's different because we have a kid, but then again, I also have photos of my xbf from prior to my marriage (13+ years ago)

 

 

Pretending those time didn't happen doesn't help me, but I also don't want to just stare at them. If they are on a cloud, if he ever asks? I can give him the link but not have to look at them unless I want to.

[guest569]

I moved them all from my phone to computer immediately after the breakup so they were less accessible. There is no way i could delete them. He was going to send me some from a really nice day that we had spent together but i kinda said what's the point now,it's just painful memories. . and we have been out of touch for over a month.

[BikerAccnt]

I moved them all from my phone to computer immediately after the breakup so they were less accessible. There is no way i could delete them. He was going to send me some from a really nice day that we had spent together but i kinda said what's the point now,it's just painful memories. . and we have been out of touch for over a month.

 

This is what I did. I know that years to come, I'll be glad I still have them. There are good memories there, even though I'm no longer with any of my exes. There were a lot of good time mixed in with the bad, and I hate to lose that part of my history. I have something, or a picture, of most all of my exess

 

I can even look back at my old wedding pictures (God was I young and I had hair! lots of it!) and smile. I laugh at the outfits, think about how good my ex and I looked together, all of it with just fond memories. Perhaps a bit of wistfull sadness about things not working out, but..that's it. I'm glad I still have them.