Are most girls willing to just meet a guy for sex?

[Justanaverageguy]

Can't un-see....

 

Care to elaborate ?

Edited July 2, 2016 by Justanaverageguy

[katiegrl]

Haha ok right - obviously not paying enough attention. The way it was written came across as if she was a guy.

 

So she is essentially angry that other women being ok with casual sex is ruining her chances with men / devaluing ?!? Basically same advice as before live and let live. Your morals don't apply to others most certainly not everyone thinks sex devalues people.

 

Actually no her post was not written to suggest she was a guy.

 

It's society's own pre-conceived notions re women and sex that caused some posters to *assume* she was a guy.

[katiegrl]

OP, get off Tinder and meet men in real life.

 

Volunteer, meet-ups groups, take a class ... hell, smile at guy you see at the coffee house !

 

Be open, friendly.... I meet tons of guys just by being open and approachable.

[Justanaverageguy]

Actually no her post was not written to suggest she was a guy.

 

It's society's own pre-conceived notions re women and sex that caused some posters to *assume* she was a guy.

 

Let's put it this way her post was gender neutral. The username also doesn't indicate gender. There is really no reference to either but as she is talking about women's actions on a hetro dating site it's pretty easy to understand why multiple people on this thread assumed she was a guy seeing as that's who you would normal assume would be concerned by this ... You know seeing as they would be the ones trying to meet them. Again my advice stays the same as on all 3 previous occasions - live and let live don't concern yourself with others preferences especially when it's just to judge them and throw rocks because it goes against your own.

Edited July 2, 2016 by Justanaverageguy

[katiegrl]

Let's put it this way her post was gender neutral. The username also doesn't indicate gender. There is really no reference to either but as she is talking about women's actions on a hetro dating site it's pretty easy to understand why multiple people on this thread assumed she was a guy seeing as that's who you would normal assume would be concerned by this ... You know seeing as they would be the ones trying to meet them. Again my advice stays the same as on all 3 previous occasions - live and let live don't concern yourself with others preferences especially when it's just to judge them and throw rocks because it goes against your own.

 

Right, her post was gender neutral. Not written to suggest she was a *guy* like you originally said.

 

Thanks for acknowledging my point!

[Justanaverageguy]

Right, her post was gender neutral. Not written to suggest she was a *guy* like you originally said.

 

Thanks for acknowledging my point!

 

I'm thrilled we got to the bottom of that brain buster

[Just a Guy]

Hi folks, I can understand where the OP is coming from because a long time ago I would have thought along similar lines. I've had a conservative upbringing and girls and women were supposed to be modest, shy and, if anything, retiring rather than forward and willing to express their sexuality quite openly and unabashadly. However, for sometime now I have realized that my attitude is antiquated in the sense that the World has changed dramatically and as we have moved into the era of the information age and the internet, those old attitudes and views are now best consigned to the dustbin of history. I am now at an age where, as they say, ' You can't teach an old dog new tricks ', but at least in terms of the way I view the World and the attitudes of the new younger generation, I have been able to change my perspective rather than continue to be die hard.

With that said, I agree with most posters who have said that most women of the younger generation are quite up front in their embracing of their sexuality and sex itself is not considered taboo or something sinful that one has to indulge in with a sense of shame to boot. Women often pursue men they desire openly and vigourosly if they want to hook up with them. There is no beating about the bush with that. It is the new Brave World. So the best thing is to embrace it and follow the new rules. Just my wee bit of learned wisdom! Cheers.

[MissBee]

I'm appalled about the guys wanting to do this too, just even more so about girls. Don't they care they could get pregnant or a disease by having sex with a stranger from the internet? And how could they be alone with them right away, they could be crazy or a killer.

 

And it affects me because I can't find anyone to date because guys just keep wanting to hookup and if I don't want to they can find other girls who do. But if no girl was willing to do that then this wouldn't be a problem.

 

I thought Tinder was geared towards hooking up, so if it is, clearly you will find mostly people wanting to hook up. Maybe try another site. However, the idea that if every woman in the world didn't want to hook up that would help you is self-centered. People are allowed to want different things at different times. It's not true that they are preventing you from finding a man who wants more...many exist. That's what dating is. Finding people who want what you want, not browbeating those who don't into it.

 

If you don't want to hookup and a man moves on to someone who does, why be sad? It's clear that that's what he's looking for, so you wouldn't have been a match anyway, and that has nothing to do with anyone else. People have been looking to hook up for ages before Tinder. Consider it a favor if a guy moves on when you don't want to do what he wants. It is better than him lying to you and having sex with you when you trust him then he dashes. This way, both men and women can be upfront about what they are looking for and everyone has the free choice to accept or decline. This is a good thing.

 

While I am not one for hooking up, there are things like condoms and birth control in various forms, and responsible women in this day and age use them to help prevent disease and pregnancy should they hookup. But ultimately, try a site other than Tinder and focus on YOUR standards and needs and finding someone who is on the same page versus worrying abour controlling what you think everyone else is doing with their vag which is supposedly preventing you from living life.

Edited July 2, 2016 by MissBee

[Justanaverageguy]

However, for sometime now I have realized that my attitude is antiquated in the sense that the World has changed dramatically and as we have moved into the era of the information age and the internet, those old attitudes and views are now best consigned to the dustbin of history. I am now at an age where, as they say, ' You can't teach an old dog new tricks ', but at least in terms of the way I view the World and the attitudes of the new younger generation, I have been able to change my perspective rather than continue to be die hard. With that said, I agree with most posters who have said that most women of the younger generation are quite up front in their embracing of their sexuality and sex itself is not considered taboo or something sinful that one has to indulge in with a sense of shame to boot. Women often pursue men they desire openly and vigourosly if they want to hook up with them. There is no beating about the bush with that. It is the new Brave World. So the best thing is to embrace it and follow the new rules. Just my wee bit of learned wisdom! Cheers.

 

I kind of agree but also disagree at the same time. I don't encourage anyone to simply "go with the crowd" and follow just because everyone else is doing it. I do encourage an open mind. Realize many women have taken control of their sexuality and there is now a varied spectrum of sexual preferences amongst women as opposed to the old days. Girls aren't just following the old rules.

 

Figure out your own preferences and what you desire and are comfortable with and be brave enough to stick with that regardless of whether people judge you or it makes it a bit difficult with dating. People judge because they need external validation of their own opinion. They might see you as being too much of a prude or it could be the other end of the spectrum and too open and free with your sexuality. These people are sheep who take their cues only from what other people tell them rather then what comes from within. Be true to yourself and let others do the same.

Edited July 2, 2016 by Justanaverageguy

[spiderowl]

Since most guys are just trying to hookup on Tinder and other free dating sites does that mean most girls are willing to just go and do that? Because that's appalling to me.

 

Maybe some girls think Tinder is for dating guys not hooking up for sex

[joseb]

Right, her post was gender neutral. Not written to suggest she was a *guy* like you originally said.

 

Thanks for acknowledging my point!

 

I missed it too initially.

In fairness, I'd say 99% of 'complaining' post on here are complaining about the opposite gender.

 

As to the OPs question, many many women's profiles I've seen that have anything written specifically state that they are not looking for hookups/ONS/DTF.

Now, whether or not they stick to that is another question.

[Lorenza]

I would never ever hook up just for sex. It's completely against everything I stand for. And I do admit that in my mind I don't approve others' choice to do it (both men and women) but at the same I know that I have to keep my views to myself and my judgment is irrelevant to others. So I never criticize when a friend does it. To them maybe it's not disgusting at all, maybe it's very good and needed and doesn't have the same significance as it has to me. Who am I to shame them.

 

Besides, Tinder is just like any other dating site here where I'm from. So it's never safe to assume someone you met there is up for ONS.

[lftbehind]

I also think it's too bad that sex has turned into more of a recreational activity than a way to show that you really love someone. It's sad to me. I am a woman and I do like sex a lot, but I have met a lot of guys that want to have sex right away without even taking time to get to know me. I was talking to a friend of mine and she has had the same experience. She says that they just want to go to bed with you and that's all. We are both nice women with good personalities, but guys go for the sex. It's very disheartening.

[LivingWaterPlease]

I believe there are guys who are wanting to save sex for marriage but they aren't the norm.

 

I personally am not interested in having sex outside of marriage and am single. I've found men to be respectful of my choice but always pushing the boundary, too. Not allowing sex in my dating relationships hasn't been a deal breaker for any guy I've dated.