I unfriended and block emotional affair partner. Where do I go from here?

[NTV]

Wow Sato, have you and Patrice had this conversation before? lol sounded almost rehearsed.....

 

 

But there is nothing in the OP's story to indicate that this guy is an egomaniacal sociopath. Yes, it's still important to be able to spot the folks that are, but I would argue that this guy could have thought this was a friendship until he crossed a line and then didn't know where to stop. There is nothing she said that indicates he's some sort of mad scientist grooming her to be teacher's pet. And even if he was, it doesn't happen in a vacuum. She had the choice to go along with it, but recognized it was wrong and stopped it.

 

 

I don't see where the scheming sociopath is relevant really, other than as a word of warning. Really, if this guy was one of those user/abuser types it'd probably be a lot more confusing story and he'd have some real big ugly hooks still in her. It'd be a lot more manipulation in his part to keep her from leaving, that's for sure.

 

 

Nope, the real important piece of this story is the strength she showed in keeping her boundaries in the right place.

[MsHopeful0208201689]

Wow Sato, have you and Patrice had this conversation before? lol sounded almost rehearsed.....

 

 

But there is nothing in the OP's story to indicate that this guy is an egomaniacal sociopath. Yes, it's still important to be able to spot the folks that are, but I would argue that this guy could have thought this was a friendship until he crossed a line and then didn't know where to stop. There is nothing she said that indicates he's some sort of mad scientist grooming her to be teacher's pet. And even if he was, it doesn't happen in a vacuum. She had the choice to go along with it, but recognized it was wrong and stopped it.

 

 

I don't see where the scheming sociopath is relevant really, other than as a word of warning. Really, if this guy was one of those user/abuser types it'd probably be a lot more confusing story and he'd have some real big ugly hooks still in her. It'd be a lot more manipulation in his part to keep her from leaving, that's for sure.

 

 

Nope, the real important piece of this story is the strength she showed in keeping her boundaries in the right place.

 

Ironically, I agree with Satu & Patrice. As I reflect he has made many comments that seemed either a bit sadistic, sociopathic, or predatory.... I've did my research & I found him to have many of the traits. Almost like a Dr. Jekyl/Mr. Hyde type personality.

[whatever29]

It is hard to do! They come off as very charming, with a good sob story. When you get to the other side of this and start exposing who they are? Expect the abusive side of these people to emerge, it always does.

 

Or they backoff really quick because they don't want to hear the truth. They don't want to know that you've seen through their crap.

[whatever29]

Ironically, I agree with Satu & Patrice. As I reflect he has made many comments that seemed either a bit sadistic, sociopathic, or predatory.... I've did my research & I found him to have many of the traits. Almost like a Dr. Jekyl/Mr. Hyde type personality.

 

Since you know the truth about him, it shouldn't be a question whether to stay away. Change gyms and block all contact. These MM are leeches who will suck you dry.

[MsHopeful0208201689]

I've currently gone 17 days days NO Contact with him. I do still think about him but I am so busy & not about to use my phone when I am at work (I've been doing 9.5 hour days at work) so this helps a lot. Also I try to meet and talk to different people everywhere I go so I won't be tempted to reach out.

[Lobe]

I've currently gone 17 days days NO Contact with him. I do still think about him but I am so busy & not about to use my phone when I am at work (I've been doing 9.5 hour days at work) so this helps a lot. Also I try to meet and talk to different people everywhere I go so I won't be tempted to reach out.

 

For funsies, pick up a copy of "In Sheep's Clothing."

 

Stay strong!

[Poppy47]

What do you do now?

 

Just keep going and don't look back. No Contact, change gyms, do not go near the place you know he will be.

 

Avoid any triggers.

 

Recreate a new reality for yourself with you as the star. That's what needs to be done.

 

Poppy.

[Lois_Griffin]

Where do you go from here?

 

You move forward positively, now that you've gotten rid of the cancer in your life.

 

If I had a dime for every unscrupulous 40+ year old married man who purposefully (and make no mistake - it was done purposefully) befriended a woman in her 20's who was just gullible enough to actually believe his bullsh*t story that he 'just wants to be friends,' I'd have myself a waterfront condo on the French Riviera. And 3 fancy foreign sports cars parked in the driveway.

 

Sorry to tell you OP, but young, somewhat gullible ladies who don't have a lot of life experience - such as yourself - are EXACTLY what these predators are looking for.