East Asian Men: Why are we unattractive? **Updated**

[Eternal Sunshine]

I hear you. Any white man that struggles with dating should just go Asian - he can get a much hotter Asian girl relative to his own looks because Asian women are desparate for white. It's kind of sad. One Asian girl told me that she doesn't date Asian men because they all remind her of her cousins I have nothing against multi racial couples, it's when people say that they don't date their own race - I just go WTF??? Asian girls are at the top of that list. Annoys the hell out of me.

 

I would happily date an East Asian guy provided that he is above 5'8" tall (my height). Last guy I dated was Chinese.... I have to say that it was a bit of turn off that he was constnatly telling me that he is the least desirable race and constantly asking for reassurance that I will see him again.

[Emilia]

I hear you. Any white man that struggles with dating should just go Asian - he can get a much hotter Asian girl relative to his own looks because Asian women are desparate for white. It's kind of sad. One Asian girl told me that she doesn't date Asian men because they all remind her of her cousins I have nothing against multi racial couples, it's when people say that they don't date their own race - I just go WTF??? Asian girls are at the top of that list. Annoys the hell out of me.

 

I would happily date an East Asian guy provided that he is above 5'8" tall (my height). Last guy I dated was Chinese.... I have to say that it was a bit of turn off that he was constnatly telling me that he is the least desirable race and constantly asking for reassurance that I will see him again.

Inter-racial dating appears to open a whole can of worms I'd never anticipated. I'm considering giving it up, not because I don't find other races attractive but because of the underlying almost political issues (one's own perceptions of this weird racial hierarchy) that I really can't be bothered to deal with.

[SwordofFlame]

OP, it's not just your race that's a disadvantage, it's also your height. The two often go together for Asian guys, unfortunately. The extremely rare asian guy that I've seen with a very attractive white woman were also very tall. Look, you're going to struggle. The best thing you could do is compensate for it by earning a lot of money.

 

Nobody said life was fair. Life isn't fair. You just need to accept that and make the best of it.

[normal person]

It's not that there are no attractive East Asian men. It's just that there are so FEW. As an East Asian Male who grew up in the west, I can't tell you how many times I've heard women of all races including Asian women say they just can't date a Chinese guy or an Asian guy.

 

A Chinese guy that would be considered attractive in China is at very best average in the US. A hot Chinese guy in the US would be in the top 1%. I've heard this white girl once comment that she has seen a lot of cute Asian guys but that they'd pretty much have to be perfect to be considered hot. As in, there's always something physically wrong with them.

 

I hear your frustration but you've got to accept that everyone has irrational attractions and preferences. I'm a white guy, and I only date white girls. I've got nothing against other races, I think plenty of women of other races are beautiful, but nothing turns me on quite like a sarcastic, fit, 5'5", blonde, white girl with a great job. And I discriminate against white girls all the time too. Too tall, too uninteresting, too fat, or short hair? No thanks.

 

So extrapolate those principles and preferences to every person out there. Since people for the most part tend to date within their own race, and since you're a minority, you've got to accept that the numbers are just naturally skewed against you. Not by design. You're a minority in a country where the majority tends to date within itself. It's not calculated, it's just the way it is. It'd be the same for a Mexican guy in the Ukraine. You said you're a proud Canadian and you love all the opportunities the country has afforded you, but this one of the trade offs of that. If your family had never immigrated, perhaps you'd have less career opportunities but be married.

 

I feel that if I'm asking for advice, I have to say, "hey by the way, I'm an Asian guy who is 5'5." Then everything becomes clearer.

 

Not to derail the thread but your height is probably also contributing to some of your struggles concurrently.

 

As an Asian guy, I feel invisible to non-Asian women. Asian women may notice me but they aren't attracted to me because there are better options such as white men out there. But for non-Asian women, I feel like I don't exist in their eyes and when I do take initiative, I find they have already labelled me as "unattractive Asian dude" and don't even give me a chance.

 

Fair enough. What do you do to prove them wrong or show them what they're missing? By accepting their criticism of you as "unattractive Asian dude," you're letting them be right. Show them why they're wrong. What is it about you that they aren't seeing or appreciating?

[jen1447]

fwiw, I really don't think this is a case where indulging OP's insecurities is helpful to him. That can work when ppl go thru temporary "I suck" phases that are essentially emotional reactions to rejection, but OP seems to have constructed an elaborate rationalization for an entire ethos that appears to be designed to protect him from risking further disappointment and to let him off the hook for making an effort moving forward, not to mention justifying past failures on the basis of some outside forces conspiring against him. That's not healthy and not productive for his future.

 

If you say "yeah, you have a point" to that you're just sinking him further down the hole he's digging for himself.

[normal person]

A lot of white people, especially white men, will totally disregard my rant. Why? Well it's just preference apparently. But if it was really down to preference, why are there so few Asian guys dating non-Asian girls? Why is the opposite, white guys with Asian girls so common?

 

Because preferences are irrational and complex. Women are attracted to not only success, but things like power, authority, etc. White men are the largest, dominant, driving cultural force in the west, if not the world. And lots of men prefer docile, agreeable, pliant women, attributes which are quite common in Asian cultures. The thing is, as I said in an earlier post, "Asian" qualities like compliance and obedience don't always translate well into the western view of masculinity, which is often aggressive and defiant. In my experience, Asian men seem to just keep their heads down and do what they're told, they seem to lack the rebellious aggression that North America was born out of. However, those "Asian" qualities in women fill a certain niche within the west because lots of women here have long since been more sovereign, individualistic, rebellious, etc and Asian women and their notably more feminine attitudes are exotic and desirable to the cultural engine, which is largely made up of white men. Just my thoughts.

 

On a personal note, I'm instantly not attracted to any Asian girl who I feel is too meek, too compliant, or fetishizing my whiteness. Not my taste. Too boring for me. At the end of the day, I'm attracted to the opposite traits (I'd call them "Western" but I'm sure someone will tell me I'm generalizing). Now take the same Asian girl, and make her a total boss who kicked ass, knew what was best for herself, knew what she deserved and made damn sure she got it, didn't give a crap what my race was and wanted to know what I'd accomplished in my life and challenged me, my interest would be quite piqued. I know most other guys don't go for this alpha female type, but I'd bet the same concept would apply to Asian men who adopted similar traits. Western women would probably pay them more attention.

 

We've gotten the totally short end of the stick. We grew up in this country and have done well for the most part...except dating. We are the most successful minority in the US/Canada and are regarded as a model minority. In many ways, we are a success but total failures/losers in dating.

 

Asians are the most successful ethnic group in America, minority or otherwise. But I think you're exaggerating the dating issue a bit. To my knowledge there's no epidemic of Asians coming to the west, failing to get married one way or another and dying lonely. That isn't to say a lot don't struggle somehow, because they seem to be the ethnic group that struggles the most, but most of them figure it out at some point, don't they?

 

To be honest, I hear a lot more about hopeless men in China totally outnumbering women due to their one child policy, and the rise of Japan's "herbivore men" who find Japanese women and culture too demanding, so they eschew masculinity and don't even try to date or marry.

 

If we're speaking anec dotally, the Asian guys I know who are Westernized seem to do fine one way or the other. It's the Asian guys who aren't Westernized, or the ones who think they're westernized enough (but still seem foreign to native westerners) that struggle.

 

Yet no one seems to care. You have people all concerned about hurting the feelings of black men and muslim men but you never hear anything about how Asian men must feel. I know that 90% of you reading this post will just disregard what I've written and judge it as coming from someone who is a desperate and unattractive loser. It's funny how an angry Black men or a Muslim men will be taken seriously when he feels he's been unjustly treated but an Asian guy who complains about encountering racism in the dating world will just be ignored and written off so easily.

 

If people aren't as sympathetic, it's because blacks and muslims frequently face problems that are higher up on the hierarchy of things to be mad about. Unarmed blacks frequently getting shot by the police or profiling and/or harassment of muslims are often disturbing intrusions into their lives that fly in the face of this country's values. I feel much worse for the kid who did nothing wrong and was shot for it than I do the Asian guy who did nothing wrong but can't get a girlfriend. I'm sure it's no fun for Asian guys, but you've got to accept that on the totem pole of importance, this isn't a big societal priority. You can't take a girl to court for not being attracted to you.

 

It's funny how an angry Black men or a Muslim men will be taken seriously when he feels he's been unjustly treated but an Asian guy who complains about encountering racism in the dating world will just be ignored and written off so easily.

 

Also, not being attracted to someone is not racist in the same way you traditionally think of racism. If you deny someone a job based on race, that's against the law. But there's no law saying you have to "equal opportunity" date people you don't find attractive, your attractions aren't held to standards of law, they're held to your own personal standards of biology. Attraction is irrational, people can't control who they're attracted to and who they aren't.

 

Do you really want someone to have to go out with you under some government mandate, despite a lack of attraction to you, just because it's supposedly "fair" to you (let's not even consider how she feels about it, shall we?)? Do you think every white girl should have to fill some dating quota of Asian guys like colleges do with minority acceptance? If you weren't attracted to someone, but they were to you, should you be forced to date them under some law? It sounds pretty egregious to me. I'm not really sure what you're after here. I'm sorry life isn't fair?

[normal person]

I cam across this article (written by an Asian guy) which I think is relevant, OP:

 

Part 1: Do Asian Women Prefer White Men?

 

Part 2: Are Asian Men Less Desirable?

 

There is some decent insight in these articles, a lot of it has echoed what I've mentioned in previous posts.

 

"First of all, stop complaining. There are going to be Asian female, White male couples. Just like there will be some Asian male, White female couples (rising numbers in fact). By complaining, you are declaring yourself weaker or inferior to someone who is white. Stop this thinking."

 

"Females in the states like aggressive, pursuing men, whereas females overseas generally prefer the opposite. Quiet, humble, polite, hard-working are the typical desired traits in Asia. Asian men need to learn a whole new set of dating skills and behaviors once they move to the States. This is not easy for them, and up until now it’s been a struggle for most Asian men to acclimate."

[LookAtThisPOst]

I hear you. Any white man that struggles with dating should just go Asian - he can get a much hotter Asian girl relative to his own looks because Asian women are desparate for white. It's kind of sad. One Asian girl told me that she doesn't date Asian men because they all remind her of her cousins

 

I get the feeling that's her way of saying, "they all look alike", not being crass here, but that's how I interpret it.

 

 

I have nothing against multi racial couples, it's when people say that they don't date their own race - I just go WTF??? Asian girls are at the top of that list. Annoys the hell out of me.

 

Right...I've seen a few completely white women say in their POF headlines, "Blacks only please!" I had one woman in my area tell me that she dated white men for a time, but they simply don't "do it" for her as black men do, and thus just FZ's them.

[jen1447]

Right...I've seen a few completely white women say in their POF headlines, "Blacks only please!" I had one woman in my area tell me that she dated white men for a time, but they simply don't "do it" for her as black men do, and thus just FZ's them.

 

Actually somewhat common from what I see personally, which makes me scratch my head about the supposed white/male privilege described here. (Not many race/gender combinations get their own niche of cuckold porn but white/males < black/males w white/females do. I never see videos of Asian men helplessly sitting on the sidelines while white men have sex w their Asian women.)

[offwithhishead]

I would happily date an East Asian guy provided that he is above 5'8" tall (my height). Last guy I dated was Chinese.... I have to say that it was a bit of turn off that he was constnatly telling me that he is the least desirable race and constantly asking for reassurance that I will see him again.

 

If you could step into an Asian guy's shoes, maybe you'd have more sympathy. You have no idea the humiliating things we have had to hear growing up. You don't just shake out of those things so easily.

 

OP, it's not that you're Asian, it's just that you're short. Or that you're Asian.

 

If somehow you got a race change, you'd still have the same problem. So you'll blame it on being short. If somehow you got a height extension, same thing.

 

I will admit, you do have it rough, but being a bitch about it doesn't do ****.

 

Not true. A white guy I know whose the same height as me except he's worse than me in just about every other way still can still get a 5'1 Asian girl.

 

A 5'1 Asian girl won't date a 5'5 Asian guy and will say he's too short but she'll date a 5'5 white guy. Short white guy > Short Asian guy.

 

Are you after specifically Asian women? Is that what you really are after?

 

No I'm open to women of all races. It's just that I've entirely given up on non-Asian women due to repeated rejection and I'm just about to give up on Asian women. The little success I've had with dating have all been Asian women.

 

I hear your frustration but you've got to accept that everyone has irrational attractions and preferences. I'm a white guy, and I only date white girls. I've got nothing against other races, I think plenty of women of other races are beautiful, but nothing turns me on quite like a sarcastic, fit, 5'5", blonde, white girl with a great job. And I discriminate against white girls all the time too. Too tall, too uninteresting, too fat, or short hair? No thanks.

 

So extrapolate those principles and preferences to every person out there. Since people for the most part tend to date within their own race, and since you're a minority, you've got to accept that the numbers are just naturally skewed against you. Not by design. You're a minority in a country where the majority tends to date within itself. It's not calculated, it's just the way it is. It'd be the same for a Mexican guy in the Ukraine. You said you're a proud Canadian and you love all the opportunities the country has afforded you, but this one of the trade offs of that. If your family had never immigrated, perhaps you'd have less career opportunities but be married.

 

Not to derail the thread but your height is probably also contributing to some of your struggles concurrently.

 

Fair enough. What do you do to prove them wrong or show them what they're missing? By accepting their criticism of you as "unattractive Asian dude," you're letting them be right. Show them why they're wrong. What is it about you that they aren't seeing or appreciating?

 

Except I feel that it is calculated or by design. You even said, most people date within their own race EXCEPT Asian girls. Most Asian girls who grew up in the west date non-Asian men. It's a phenomenon.

 

Those Asian couples you see aren't Asian-Americans or Asian-Canadians. They came here late and we call them FOBs. They met in Asia and most likely immigrated here together. The Asians who grew up in US/Canada, most of the girls date outside their race. They are the ONLY female minority to do this.

 

As for me being a proud Canadian, it's strange because those same white men who fetishize Asian girls and target Asian girls for sexual conquest might easily are NOT the same white men who have treated me fairly, mentored me, and given me chances to become a successful person.

 

All the white men I've come to admire and who have treated me with fairness or kindness, their spouses are all white.

 

The kind of white men who date Asian girls are a strange sort of white man, the lesser sort. A lot of them can't do well with a white girl and see Asian girls as an attractive alternative. The surprising thing is, Asian girls don't feel insulted by this. They'll gladly go out with a 2nd class white man who has odd fetishist thought about her rather than a respectful Asian guy.

 

Because preferences are irrational and complex. Women are attracted to not only success, but things like power, authority, etc. White men are the largest, dominant, driving cultural force in the west, if not the world. And lots of men prefer docile, agreeable, pliant women, attributes which are quite common in Asian cultures. The thing is, as I said in an earlier post, "Asian" qualities like compliance and obedience don't always translate well into the western view of masculinity, which is often aggressive and defiant. In my experience, Asian men seem to just keep their heads down and do what they're told, they seem to lack the rebellious aggression that North America was born out of. However, those "Asian" qualities in women fill a certain niche within the west because lots of women here have long since been more sovereign, individualistic, rebellious, etc and Asian women and their notably more feminine attitudes are exotic and desirable to the cultural engine, which is largely made up of white men. Just my thoughts.

 

 

OK so let me get this straight. White women have become too feminist, independent for white men and in addition, white men have gotten sick of the round-eyed, blonde look and so now they want meek, submissive, feminine Asian women who look exotic?

 

And somehow we Asian men have to pay the price for this? It was white men who gave up power and allowed white women to have more and more freedom and liberation. I'm not saying anything is wrong with this. I am not against this but how come Asian men have to pay the price for this?

 

Asians are the most successful ethnic group in America, minority or otherwise. But I think you're exaggerating the dating issue a bit. To my knowledge there's no epidemic of Asians coming to the west, failing to get married one way or another and dying lonely. That isn't to say a lot don't struggle somehow, because they seem to be the ethnic group that struggles the most, but most of them figure it out at some point, don't they?

 

Yah I think they eventually figure it out....if you count figuring out as eventually ending up with a white women divorcee in an elderly age. I've seen elderly couples in their 50s where the man is Asian and the woman is white. She is probably a divorcee or multiple divorcee and just got tired of being with douchebag white men and eventually finally settled for a loyal Asian man. By then, her libido is gone so it's not like she needs to be physically attracted to her guy. She had all that fun with her tall handsome white male husbands/boyfriends when she was young. Now she needs a loyal, stable, financially successful Asian man to support her into old age.

 

Yah I guess I have that to look forward to when I'm in my 50s.....

 

To be honest, I hear a lot more about hopeless men in China totally outnumbering women due to their one child policy, and the rise of Japan's "herbivore men" who find Japanese women and culture too demanding, so they eschew masculinity and don't even try to date or marry.

 

Yah Asian men in Asia have a lot of problems but a lot of those problems are their own fault. But what if you see Asian men in Asia come over and start taking all the white women? Because that's what white men have done. White men messed up their own culture and as a result, white women become harder to date so white men start dating Asian women.

 

At least when Asian men mess up their own societies, we suffer alone and take it instead of messing it up for other people.

 

 

 

If people aren't as sympathetic, it's because blacks and muslims frequently face problems that are higher up on the hierarchy of things to be mad about. Unarmed blacks frequently getting shot by the police or profiling and/or harassment of muslims are often disturbing intrusions into their lives that fly in the face of this country's values. I feel much worse for the kid who did nothing wrong and was shot for it than I do the Asian guy who did nothing wrong but can't get a girlfriend. I'm sure it's no fun for Asian guys, but you've got to accept that on the totem pole of importance, this isn't a big societal priority. You can't take a girl to court for not being attracted to you.

 

Angry, pissed off white men formed the KKK in order to subjugate blacks in the southern US. These white men weren't being discriminated against or being shot at. They simply wanted to maintain their superiority over the Black man. It seems every race in the US has resorted to violence in order to express their anger. All except Asian men. We just stay silent and take it. The most we do is speak out occasionally in the media or mostly just on internet forums like this and even this, we don't taken seriously and just get written off as a "non-issue."

 

 

 

Also, not being attracted to someone is not racist in the same way you traditionally think of racism. If you deny someone a job based on race, that's against the law. But there's no law saying you have to "equal opportunity" date people you don't find attractive, your attractions aren't held to standards of law, they're held to your own personal standards of biology. Attraction is irrational, people can't control who they're attracted to and who they aren't.

 

So in other words, Asian men are like the neanderthals and are meant to be slowly become extinct due to genetic inferiority.

 

Do you really want someone to have to go out with you under some government mandate, despite a lack of attraction to you, just because it's supposedly "fair" to you (let's not even consider how she feels about it, shall we?)? Do you think every white girl should have to fill some dating quota of Asian guys like colleges do with minority acceptance? If you weren't attracted to someone, but they were to you, should you be forced to date them under some law? It sounds pretty egregious to me. I'm not really sure what you're after here. I'm sorry life isn't fair?

 

Actually it should be made into law. It's not been unheard of. In certain South American countries after the Spanish left, they had racial laws in place where white men could not marry white women. The purpose was to destroy racial segregation and produce a true nation.

 

I wouldn't say people should be forced to date another race. But marriage should be forbidden and should be under a quota-based system.

 

A lot of white women's feelings towards Asian men is downright racist. Asian men are rejected upon sight alone. That's very similar to a white cop assuming a black man is dangerous and gets itchy-fingered as a result.

 

A white woman doesn't have to date an Asian guy who approaches her but at least treat him like a human being.

[Emilia]

Actually it should be made into law. It's not been unheard of. In certain South American countries after the Spanish left, they had racial laws in place where white men could not marry white women. The purpose was to destroy racial segregation and produce a true nation.

 

I wouldn't say people should be forced to date another race. But marriage should be forbidden and should be under a quota-based system.

 

A lot of white women's feelings towards Asian men is downright racist. Asian men are rejected upon sight alone. That's very similar to a white cop assuming a black man is dangerous and gets itchy-fingered as a result.

 

A white woman doesn't have to date an Asian guy who approaches her but at least treat him like a human being.

You sound like those whiny little men that sometimes post here about 'feminism' and how 'dating used to be better in the old days when men owned women'. That could be reason why you are struggling.

 

This is all in your mind.

[preraph]

Offwithhishead, I'll agree with you that Asian men have a slight disadvantage at least at the current time in culture because Asian women are getting interest from a broad range of men. Not sure that will last forever.

 

But I have to say this. You said yourself that what success you've had has been dating Asians. But for some reason that makes you mad. You have some entitlement that has made you think you should be able to just date whoever. But the reality is that MOST people date within their own race, within their own town, and can only get people at their own attractiveness range. I feel you have some entitlement making you feel you deserve women out of your own race, out of your own attractiveness range. It's a deficit when someone can't be attracted to someone who is the most suitable for them. It's not bad luck or anything like that. It's a personal deficit, as if you need someone more ideal to bolster yourself and bring your own level up so you feel good about yourself. Like people who really can't afford it who will only wear apparel with a designer name stuck to it. There is some average Asian woman out there who would be a good match for you but you're not going to get and keep her if you are always looking over her shoulder at the women you will never be able to get.

[normal person]

Except I feel that it is calculated or by design. You even said, most people date within their own race EXCEPT Asian girls. Most Asian girls who grew up in the west date non-Asian men. It's a phenomenon.

 

I never said the bold, that's your assumption. It's hard to agree or disagree without any numbers. Not calculated or by design by western culture. You live in a majority "white" culture. Most men where you are are western men. Most of the best, most attractive, most appealing (the article I linked calls them "top predators") men that every women wants are going to be white just because most people in your country are white. If it were 50% Asian, you can bet 50% of those top predators would be Asian. But Asians represent a much smaller percentage of the population in reality.

 

Those Asian couples you see aren't Asian-Americans or Asian-Canadians. They came here late and we call them FOBs. They met in Asia and most likely immigrated here together. The Asians who grew up in US/Canada, most of the girls date outside their race. They are the ONLY female minority to do this.

 

So is your gripe with western culture, or is it with the Asian women who've found their niche in the west easier than Asian men?

 

The kind of white men who date Asian girls are a strange sort of white man, the lesser sort. A lot of them can't do well with a white girl and see Asian girls as an attractive alternative. The surprising thing is, Asian girls don't feel insulted by this. They'll gladly go out with a 2nd class white man who has odd fetishist thought about her rather than a respectful Asian guy.

 

I know it's anec dotal but I'm tempted to agree with some of this, or at least the theory. I have a disdain for people (of any type) who can't hack it one way or another, be it romantically or professionally, or whatever, so instead of trying to uplift themselves, do the hard work, and improve their lives to get the things they want, they settle into mediocrity and pretend like it's all they've ever wanted. Like one of those guys who gets married to a morbidly obese woman (the kind that are so big and immobile TLC makes documentaries about them) and talks about what an incredible person she is while having to wipe her ass and wash her with a hose because she can't get up or fit in the shower. It's an extreme example but the basic principal still applies elsewhere. People who are unable to do what's necessary to get the things they want will settle for an easier option.

 

I'm sure the overwhelming majority of white guys out there legitimately love their Asian partners for the people that they are, but I can't help but feel like there's more than a few "asterisks" to that out there. As I said, I'm not really attracted to Asian women, often times they seem too "easy" (not in a sexual way), but in the sense that oftentimes pursuing them isn't much of a challenge. It's kind of the same feeling I'd have getting a lap dance from a stripper, who just sees a wallet. What a turn off. I just have this underlying worry like they don't appreciate you (as much) as an individual, rather than "a guy with a good career/education/nice family/etc," as if that's all there is to you. I'm generalizing, of course. Like I said, if I met an ass-kicking, independent, challenging alpha Asian female, I'd be singing a different tune.

 

OK so let me get this straight. White women have become too feminist, independent for white men and in addition, white men have gotten sick of the round-eyed, blonde look and so now they want meek, submissive, feminine Asian women who look exotic?

 

It's a generalization that I'm making that touches upon the earlier point. I'll try and simplify further. White, western women are oftentimes demanding. Too demanding for a lot of white guys. Asian women, I think (I'd love to hear from some Asian women on what they think, too), have an inclination towards western men for whatever reason (also keep in mind that we're talking about white-majority countries where by default, "partnering up" often means being with a white guy. That's just how the numbers work.) and can be more forgiving towards western men, for whatever reason we want to think.

 

And somehow we Asian men have to pay the price for this?

 

No one is saying they "have" to. However, that might be how the cards fall given complex societal and cultural systems, but it's not the law. It's like saying "why do gazelles have to get eaten by lions?" It's way more complex than basic morality. No one wants to see other people struggling, no one wants to see gazelles get eaten -- in a different world, there'd be enough food and women and resources so that people wouldn't have to compete for everything. But that isn't the case.

[normal person]

Yah Asian men in Asia have a lot of problems but a lot of those problems are their own fault. But what if you see Asian men in Asia come over and start taking all the white women? Because that's what white men have done. White men messed up their own culture and as a result, white women become harder to date so white men start dating Asian women.

 

I wouldn't be so quick to call it "messing up." It's creating a competitive environment which will eventually drive progress. In the big picture, that's probably good for the advancement of society. If women of whatever desired race become more demanding, men will have to be better to appeal to them. The ones who can't/won't get left in the dust. Darwinism.

 

At least when Asian men mess up their own societies, we suffer alone and take it instead of messing it up for other people.

Asians are in the west by their own volition. If you think the culture is messed up, it's not to discriminate, it's just that you happen to have chosen to be here and have chosen to accept the state of things.

 

It seems every race in the US has resorted to violence in order to express their anger. All except Asian men. We just stay silent and take it.

 

Have they? I'm no history buff, but I don't recall ever hearing about any major hispanic, Middle Eastern, or South Asian uprisings. Blacks have been the most marginalized in American society. I can see why black people would want to resort to violence to change things. Their lives are affected for generations due to systemic problems and policies. There was an internment of Japanese during WW2 and exploitation of the Chinese to build the transcontinental railroad, but Asians have fared pretty well since. They are currently the most successful ethnic group (including whites) in America. Comparing your struggles in finding a girlfriend to the plight of slaves is a bit myopic, don't you think?

 

The most we do is speak out occasionally in the media or mostly just on internet forums like this and even this, we don't taken seriously and just get written off as a "non-issue."

 

I'm not trying to discredit your pain and struggles, but I do think it's less urgent of a problem than a lot of other societal issues.

 

So in other words, Asian men are like the neanderthals and are meant to be slowly become extinct due to genetic inferiority.

 

This is a joke, right? There are over 4 billion Asians out there. Asians make up the the majority of the population of planet Earth, just not the majority of of the area where you live. But you (and/or your family) choose to live in the west and complain that it isn't as advantageous to your love life as it is to westerners. Is this that much of a surprise that Western dating culture favors westerners? That's like a white guy going to the Congo and complaining that he's at a disadvantage because none of the girls like white men. No s****.

 

Actually it should be made into law. It's not been unheard of. In certain South American countries after the Spanish left, they had racial laws in place where white men could not marry white women. The purpose was to destroy racial segregation and produce a true nation.

 

I wouldn't say people should be forced to date another race. But marriage should be forbidden and should be under a quota-based system.

 

Go ahead and vote for whatever tyrant wants to run on this platform. I'll stick with the liberties of the system we've got, where everyone's free to marry who they want, thanks.

 

A lot of white women's feelings towards Asian men is downright racist. Asian men are rejected upon sight alone. That's very similar to a white cop assuming a black man is dangerous and gets itchy-fingered as a result.

 

Yeah, making decisions on race is technically "racist," but who you're attracted to isn't held to the standard of the law, and it's not even something you can control. Your preference for Asian women and white women is also "racist." Hispanics' preference for Hispanics is also racist. I don't date Asian women, it's technically "racist." But it's not malicious or calculated, it's just how the cards have fallen. Attraction isn't something you can help. Are you going to mandate that I go out with overweight women when I reject overweight women upon sight alone? Would that not be "fattist?" Would you go out with a girl with Down's Syndrome or would you reject her on the premise alone?

 

How much do we have to compromise our lives so that every single person can be perfectly happy?

 

A good idea would be to stop complaining and do something that disproves any preconception people have of you. Is it fair that you have to do it? No, and I sympathize. But at the same time, I can't sympathize with you further if you can't accept the world as it is and won't accept the fact that it won't cater to your personal whims and desires. If you're not happy, do something about it. Preferably something effective.

[basil67]

I used to work for a Japanese trading house. My female Japanese co-workers only wanted to date white men. Why? Because they disliked the attitudes and culture of Japanese men.

 

They found the western views of men from other countries more to their liking.

[LookAtThisPOst]

I used to work for a Japanese trading house. My female Japanese co-workers only wanted to date white men. Why? Because they disliked the attitudes and culture of Japanese men.

 

They found the western views of men from other countries more to their liking.

 

People will always like something better than what's already around them. Grass is always greener.

[basil67]

People will always like something better than what's already around them. Grass is always greener.

 

If that was true, these women wouldn't have settled down with and married the western guys.

[William]

Folks, we got a report that the thread was trending to racial discussion so I took a look at the last page, the starting post, the long list of moderation interactions with the thread in our private area and who did the interacting and will close this temporarily while those moderators take a look since they're more up on the dynamics here than I am.

 

Thank you for your contributions and we'll get this processed presently. Have a good evening!

[William]

After review, seems this thread has taken a bad turn so I'll say that it has run it's course and will remain closed. ~T